Dead_and_Gone

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Dead_and_Gone

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 11 October 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8578
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Dead_and_Gone : I love to play sports, mostly football and soccer,i love to party and listen to music.

Dead_and_Gone's page activity

Visits<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 5:48pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:59pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 2:55am<b>jedi012</b> - the 02/15/2010 at 5:22pm<b>baby_gurl2405</b> - the 12/17/2009 at 5:39pm<b>wtfismyfml</b> - the 09/01/2009 at 5:36pm<b>fmyl09</b> - the 07/19/2009 at 11:55pm<b>MrJentipede</b> - the 07/17/2009 at 2:13pm<b>laughingman</b> - the 07/14/2009 at 11:32am<b>biskitbukit</b> - the 07/12/2009 at 4:29am<b>depinaariana</b> - the 07/10/2009 at 6:21pm<b>Insert_Wit_Here</b> - the 07/10/2009 at 5:58pm<b>RhymePrime</b> - the 07/09/2009 at 8:25am<b>hellomynameisril</b> - the 07/08/2009 at 12:00pm<b>Nuts_the_Wiseguy</b> - the 07/07/2009 at 7:26pm<b>tin_can_000</b> - the 07/05/2009 at 4:52pm<b>stung_09</b> - the 06/27/2009 at 8:38pm<b>soccerchic64life</b> - the 06/27/2009 at 8:27pm

Dead_and_Gone's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Dead_and_Gone's favorite FMLs

Today, I was wearing a skirt, and running towards a closing elevator, making it just in time. As soon as I ran in, my pad fell out of my underwear and onto the floor. There were 6 other people in the elevator. I picked it up before I realized I had nowhere to put it, so I held it. For 18 floors. FML

by Alice / 08/01/2009 at 4:15am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend wanted to name my penis. After 5 minutes of thinking up names, she finally picked one. Say hello to Squirtle. FML

by NinjaPanda88 / 08/01/2009 at 3:44am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my father taught my son to pee on trees outside. We went to the mall later and my son decided to practice what he'd learned on a potted plant. FML

by jcesom / 08/01/2009 at 2:35am / United States (West Virginia) / Kids

Today, I told my boyfriend I was really horny. He then gave me the link to his favorite "porn". He said I should do it for him. It was a youtube video of some girl making a sandwich. FML

by fmysexlife / 07/27/2009 at 1:06am / United States (New Hampshire) / Intimacy

Today, I told my boyfriend I was really horny. He then gave me the link to his favorite "porn". He said I should do it for him. It was a youtube video of some girl making a sandwich. FML

by fmysexlife / 07/27/2009 at 1:06am / United States (New Hampshire) / Intimacy

Today, while in the middle of having sex with my husband, instead of saying something sexy in my ear, he whispered, "We are so gonna make pizza after this." FML

by PTKFML / 07/26/2009 at 12:37am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my husband made a replica of our family on The Sims 3. I also found out he killed me off a couple weeks ago and made a new wife, KiKi. FML

by nosrepamai82 / 07/26/2009 at 12:28am / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him I had none, he yelled angrily "who comes to this city without money?" I replied "apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML

by re2K5 / 07/25/2009 at 12:39pm / Korea Republic of (Kyongsang-bukto) / Money

Today, I was walking around in a park when I pass some kids playing soccer. One of them kicks the ball as hard as he could at me. Luckily I catch the ball. Then I drop kick the ball, intending to say "go get it." Instead it ricochets of a nearby tree and hits my face. FML

by PeterRabit / 07/25/2009 at 11:11am / Canada (British Columbia) / Kids

Today, my 9 year old niece asked me if I was a virgin. I told her, "Yes, I'm saving myself until marriage". She replied, "That's a load of bullshit, you just can't get a guy!" Sadly, she's right. FML

by Kimberly / 07/25/2009 at 5:55am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was going to hang out with the girl I like, because she was leaving for the rest of the Summer. She had to cancel to go shopping with her grandma "all day." At 1 o'clock, she came online and told me how much fun she had with this guy I really don't like. She forgot that she lied to me. FML

by Jake / 07/25/2009 at 12:17am / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I awoke to my husband donning a gorilla mask in the middle of the night. My kids have been staying in a tent out back for the past few nights, and have complained of a "monster" scaring them. I told them that it was their imagination. My husband says he gets a kick out of it. FML

by Divorcemenow / 07/17/2009 at 6:02pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids

Today, my drunk boyfriend told me he thought of new positions for us to try in bed because it was getting boring. We haven't had sex yet. FML

by bellaboop1990 / 07/14/2009 at 6:13pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend of over a year said she has been faking her orgasms since the first time we've had sex. FML

by guess28 / 07/14/2009 at 2:19pm / Puerto Rico / Intimacy

Today, I went to a restaurant for lunch. The waiter brought some bread and I started eating it as I waited for him to take my order. When he approached me he looked at me and said, "Don't eat too much bread honey. It'll make you fatter." Not fat, fatter. I never thought of myself as fat. FML

by Anonymous / 07/14/2009 at 2:03pm / Spain (Madrid) / Health