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Dblocker
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 November 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 1717
  • Number of comments : 35
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Dblocker : Hi.

Dblocker's last visitors

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Dblocker's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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Dblocker's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family. My brother shook up my mom's soda, as a prank. My entire class witnessed my mom waving around an overflowing Diet Coke while my dad yelled, "Come on, put your mouth on it! Suck it! Suck it, Kathy!" FML

#4630669
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (107798) - you deserved it (8044)

On 08/18/2009 at 3:20pm - misc - by gbhlaughingstock (man) - United States

Today, I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML

#4525246
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57158) - you deserved it (6893)

On 08/14/2009 at 12:57pm - kids - by ohgod (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, my mom drove me to football practice. On the way she told me that she thought I was gay and that my friend was my lover. After 15 agonizing minutes of this, we get to my practice only to be greeted by my shirtless friend wearing a pink bandana saying "Man, you hit me hard last night." FML

#4421825
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69226) - you deserved it (5944)

On 08/10/2009 at 3:10am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I texted my girlfriend and told her I was mowing my lawn. She responded "it's about time, it keeps getting caught in my teeth!" I was referring to the lawn outside of my house. FML

#4272437
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13056) - you deserved it (46504)

On 08/04/2009 at 1:11am - misc - by jkon (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my 250 lb ex-Marine dad announced he was going to start randomly punching me in the crotch, without warning, to "improve my reflexes." FML

#4235904
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61174) - you deserved it (4976)

On 08/02/2009 at 6:45pm - health - by theregoesmyspermcount (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend wanted to name my penis. After 5 minutes of thinking up names, she finally picked one. Say hello to Squirtle. FML

#4201087
397 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63678) - you deserved it (14527)

On 08/01/2009 at 3:44am - love - by NinjaPanda88 (man) - United States (California)

Today, the boss returned from vacation. While he was gone we thought it would be a great idea to fill the water cooler with margaritas. Even after rinsing it we still have lime flavored water. Needless to say we got a company memo about appropriate office behavior. FML

#3958127
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6601) - you deserved it (43579)

On 07/22/2009 at 6:15pm - work - by shayes9 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, the boss returned from vacation. While he was gone we thought it would be a great idea to fill the water cooler with margaritas. Even after rinsing it we still have lime flavored water. Needless to say we got a company memo about appropriate office behavior. FML

#3958127
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6601) - you deserved it (43579)

On 07/22/2009 at 6:15pm - work - by shayes9 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, the boss returned from vacation. While he was gone we thought it would be a great idea to fill the water cooler with margaritas. Even after rinsing it we still have lime flavored water. Needless to say we got a company memo about appropriate office behavior. FML

#3958127
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6601) - you deserved it (43579)

On 07/22/2009 at 6:15pm - work - by shayes9 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I received a medical bill because my daughter thought it would be hilarious to try and fit her fist in her mouth. She succeeded in getting it in, but not in getting it out. FML

#3907328
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37142) - you deserved it (3012)

On 07/20/2009 at 3:10pm - health - by KnuckleSandwich (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told me that so I'd let him have girls in his bedroom. FML

#3842566
428 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32977) - you deserved it (90135)

On 07/17/2009 at 10:00pm - kids - by Pumpkin (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw a drunk guy hitting on a girl sitting alone at the bar. She insisted that her boyfriend was there, but he didn't relent. So I went over and put my arm around her and asked "Who's this guy?" He walked away, but then I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was her boyfriend. He broke my arm. FML

#3368467
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73739) - you deserved it (10879)

On 06/30/2009 at 2:57pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to my 7 year old son's school for a conference with his teacher. When I got there, the teacher said "she adored me for who and what I am". I was puzzled. Turns out my son told his class that I am a "lesbian American." Wrong. I'm Lebanese-American. FML

#3364803
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50338) - you deserved it (3076)

On 06/30/2009 at 12:17pm - kids - by lebanesewoman (woman) - Hong Kong

Today, a man from across the bar looked at me, pointed and said "MMMM, now THAT'S what I want." Offended, I confronted him to tell him I felt disrespected by him referring to me as 'that.' Turns out, he was pointing to the cheeseburger that the waitress behind me was holding. FML

#3207730
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7205) - you deserved it (45934)

On 06/25/2009 at 6:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, it was my high school graduation. Because our school colors were red, black and white, and our principal looked somewhat like Hitler, the senior class prank was to salute him when he finished his speech. I was the only one. FML

#2938815
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39932) - you deserved it (25194)

On 06/16/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)



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