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Dblocker
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 November 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 1682
  • Number of comments : 35
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Dblocker : Hi.

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Dblocker's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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Dblocker's favorite FMLs

Today, I was working at Publix ringing up some 70 year old woman. She says "Man, you're a fast cashier, I like my men fast!" and then gives me a wink. I got really nervous and didn't know how to respond, so not thinking, I quickly said, "Yeah, me too." FML

#8565371
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22849) - you deserved it (6463)

On 02/22/2010 at 8:29pm - work - by Patrick (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was checking out a gorgeous woman in spandex with beautiful flowing long black hair on the treadmill at the gym. I spent a few minutes just watching her body move and ripple under the material. She turned off the treadmill and got off, only for me to find out that it was a guy. FML

#8512491
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9777) - you deserved it (37691)

On 02/21/2010 at 10:16am - love - by anonymous - United States

Today, one of my friends pointed out I'm starting to get a mustache! - "You're finally a man!" To bad it's my 15th birthday, and I'm a girl. FML

#7897193
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25422) - you deserved it (2823)

On 02/05/2010 at 1:25am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was talking this pretty religious girl that I like. We were playing a game and I asked her if she could go back in history and meet anyone who would it be. She said Jesus. Without thinking I said "I mean someone that was real." FML

#7556761
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15584) - you deserved it (39855)

On 01/24/2010 at 10:31pm - misc - by Ben (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML

#7420693
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46038) - you deserved it (7424)

On 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm - misc - by Jon (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML

#7339757
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23545) - you deserved it (4523)

On 01/14/2010 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by scubai (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while at work at a maternity and baby clothes store, I was supposed to send out an email about our "Beat the Clock" sale. After it was sent to over 500 people, I realized that I'd misspelled the subject line. It read, "Beat the Cock Sale." FML

#7336635
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9994) - you deserved it (25193)

On 01/14/2010 at 10:55am - work - by Oops (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, at a bar, a woman approched me and tried to set me up with her friend. Looking around, the only people in the bar were a man reading the paper and a very ugly woman, looking at me and smiling. I worriedly replied, "I'm sorry, but I'm gay." Turns out her friend was the one reading the paper. FML

#7295909
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9498) - you deserved it (34588)

On 01/12/2010 at 5:26am - love - by awkward23 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I planted a bit of a condom wrapper in my bed so my housekeeper would think I have a love life. FML

#7161504
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12765) - you deserved it (27942)

On 01/05/2010 at 9:06am - love - by PJ (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my wife entered in an ugliest sweater competition at her work. She wore a plain white sweater with a picture of my face printed on it. She came home with first prize. FML

#6811696
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32596) - you deserved it (3399)

On 12/18/2009 at 2:52pm - misc - by mclovin09 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom revealed to me that when I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boys while I was feeling their "no no" area. I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read. FML

#6768891
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24702) - you deserved it (6439)

On 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband left his cell phone at home. I looked through his contacts and found a person named "The Bitch." Being a very curious person, I decided to call "The Bitch" to see who it was. My phone rang. FML

#6192797
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32787) - you deserved it (13812)

On 11/07/2009 at 5:22am - misc - by badwife (woman) - Japan

Today, I joined a dating website and spent all day filling out and improving my profile. My first match is a guy who relentlessly tried to date me for all 4 years of high school. Now he just has more reasons to tell me how much we're meant to be. We're a 97% match. FML

#5466637
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32534) - you deserved it (14988)

On 09/25/2009 at 2:16pm - love - by looking (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my husband came home from shopping with my 4 year old daughter and showed me a shirt she picked out herself. The shirt read "My mom's easy i'm living proof." Apparently she just liked the colours and her father agreed. FML

#4730526
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29972) - you deserved it (3586)

On 08/22/2009 at 5:29am - kids - by naughtyshirt (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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