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Mobility
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Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27320) - you deserved it (58290)
On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)
Today, I saw a coin on the ground. As I bent over to pick it up, some dude came up from behind, grabbed my waist and humped me three times. He ran away before I could get a good look at his face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45857) - you deserved it (7969)
On 05/15/2013 at 4:08am - misc - by asdffhhjk (man) - Philippines (Manila)
Today, while doing a fun genetics game in Biology, I found out that I was adopted. Turns out the game wasn't so fun. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48638) - you deserved it (2402)
On 05/13/2013 at 7:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (64702) - you deserved it (3721)
On 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm - intimacy - by more than I wanted to know (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)
Today, my mom asked me what a MILF is. Apparently that's her nickname at work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48226) - you deserved it (3371)
On 05/01/2013 at 11:55am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28709) - you deserved it (95636)
Today, my twelve year-old son thought it would be a good idea to relentlessly shoot the mail truck with a paintball gun in front of all the neighbors. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25509) - you deserved it (8112)
On 04/05/2013 at 12:25am - kids - by NYmets456 - United States (New York)
Today, I was lost in a foreign city so I asked a girl for directions. She replied, "Directions? ONE DIRECTION!" and started screaming in my face and jumping around. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36957) - you deserved it (3502)
On 04/03/2013 at 5:17am - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boss threatened to fire me for killing him in Minecraft. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29806) - you deserved it (5487)
On 04/02/2013 at 6:30am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14570) - you deserved it (50516)
On 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by je_regrette_tout (woman) - Sent from mobile version
Today, I went to a paintball match with a group of friends, one of whom brought his dad along. His dad is a weight-lifting, wannabe alpha male fucknut who thinks that chokeslamming opponents is a legitimate close-quarters paintball tactic. My broken shoulder disagrees. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33591) - you deserved it (2600)
On 03/02/2013 at 1:59pm - health - by Anonymous - United Kingdom
Today, I went to Hollister with my grandmother. She immediately started yelling about the music being too loud, and ordered the staff to "shut the damn thing off". She was yelling at a bunch of mannequins. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17896) - you deserved it (3555)
On 12/01/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by time to put you down, gran (woman) - United States
Today, in the middle of a hot air balloon ride with my girlfriend, I asked her to marry me. She said no. The rest of the ride was the most awkward 2 hours of my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25274) - you deserved it (2766)
On 11/04/2012 at 10:26pm - love - by Tj Hunt - United States
Today, while walking on a nearly empty street, my friend dared me to slap a tall muscular chick on the butt and run away. I went and did it, but before I even had a chance to turn and run, she grabbed me, bent me over her knee and spanked me until I cried. My friend filmed it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5134) - you deserved it (33601)
On 10/24/2012 at 1:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant. The father is my 15-year-old son. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62993) - you deserved it (6333)
On 10/11/2012 at 10:30am - kids - by wdunn69733 - United States (Georgia)
Monday 17 June 2013
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