About DatFMLDoe : I am who I am .
Bisexual and respected .
Fml doee :3
About DatFMLDoe : I am who I am .
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DatFMLDoe's favorite FMLs
Today, I attended the reading of my grandfather's last will and testament. My parents, as well as my brothers and sister, all inherited a nice sum of money. I got 69 cents, because "young Jack always was an immature little shit." FML
by JacksWag4 / 08/16/2013 at 6:21pm / United States (Michigan) / Money
Today, I discovered I have epilepsy. 10 years ago, I told my mother about my frequent fits of vertigo, deja vu, nausea, flashes of memory and strange sounds, smells, and images, coupled with an other-worldly feeling. I thought they were holy visions. So did she. FML
by seizure_girl / 08/15/2013 at 9:32am / United States (South Dakota) / Health
Today, I went to a store. I was wearing a shirt that I'd bought from the very same store, and was accused of stealing. When I tried explaining, the manager said I was lying because I'm a teenager and "all teenagers are full of shit." FML
by PapaMoti / 08/15/2013 at 4:04am / Canada (Ontario) / Money
Today, I fell asleep on the beach while tanning. I was woken up by the flock of seagulls eating the bread from my stomach. Why was bread on my stomach? Because my little brother knows birds are my biggest fear. FML
by Nanana32 / 08/14/2013 at 4:28pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Animals
Today, was my wedding day. We had a beautiful outdoor wedding and everything was going perfectly as planned. That is, until a bird flew over us and left a present right between my boobs. I had to stand at the altar for 30 minutes as bird poop melted in my cleavage. FML
by NewBride / 08/14/2013 at 1:39pm / United States (Nebraska) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 08/10/2013 at 12:02am / United States (California) / Kids
by YouSoSmelly / 08/02/2013 at 9:58am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
by SadFoxLady / 06/10/2013 at 2:01pm / United States (Iowa) / Animals
Today, my cats were making a ton of noise rolling around and fighting over their toys, and I yelled for them to knock it off. When they looked up at me, their "toy" ran away. Not a toy, but a real mouse. It's been 2 hours, and I still can't find it. FML
by drkate25 / 06/04/2013 at 12:28pm / United States (Connecticut) / Animals
by for the love of god / 05/14/2013 at 5:35pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
by BIGCHEIFAAA / 04/24/2013 at 12:55am / United States (California) / Kids
by Anonymous / 03/01/2013 at 2:18am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by WellShit / 01/03/2013 at 9:19pm / United States (Minnesota) / Health
Today, I was at a barbeque with my family, my boyfriend, and some mutual acquaintances. Someone jokingly called my boyfriend a pussy, to which he loudly replied, "I guess I am what I eat!" My mother was sitting across from us. FML
by Anonymous / 10/31/2012 at 4:24pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got…