Darth_Taco

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Offline (the 12/26/2014 at 3:07pm)

Darth_Taco

8Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 22 May 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 89503
  • Number of comments : 137
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About Darth_Taco : I like getting a good laugh out of people's everyday lives.

Darth_Taco's page activity

Visits<b>Diarrhea_Volcano</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 2:11am<b>DoctorBitch</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 10:46pm<b>10220706</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 10:36am<b>jill97</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 12:22pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 7:41pm<b>Rozay333</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 10:03pm<b>am1717</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 12:58am<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 7:35pm<b>jdam123</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 2:09pm<b>vincentjules</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 7:41am<b>Nail7777</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 12:16am<b>Thoricsteam20</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 9:20pm<b>Malteser95</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 7:13am<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 7:54pm<b>_kristaaxo</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 1:58am<b>Meriwether</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 1:21am<b>WolfAvenge</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 6:37pm<b>panromantic</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 4:53pm

Fucked!<b>Diarrhea_Volcano</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 8:11am<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 1:54am<b>beautifulmymy</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 2:16pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 1:28am<b>Animeisbaetho</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 9:23pm<b>TroubleWithStich</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 3:53pm<b>pait_loves_shane</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 6:43pm<b>Janawa</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 4:59am

Darth_Taco's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of Darth_Taco's badges

Darth_Taco's favorite FMLs

Today, I snuck out of the house for a night on the town. When I got back, I found all the doors and windows bolted shut. My sister's laughing face at my bedroom window suggests I'll be spending the rest of the night outside. FML

by cock sauce / 06/09/2012 at 5:15pm / Switzerland (Luzern) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was texting my girlfriend and asked her for a picture, expecting something provocative. She sent me a picture of her holding a positive pregnancy test. We had sex once. FML

by Anonymous / 06/09/2012 at 12:51am / United States (Mississippi) / Love

Today, when I was laying in my bed, I looked on the opposite side and saw a spider the size of my palm staring at me. And if that wasn't bad, I found out it hops. I still can't find it. FML

by somebody / 06/08/2012 at 7:13pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my sister, knowing that I'm terrified of his face, taped a picture of Michael Jackson over our toilet. When I entered the washroom, I sprinted back out screaming. Minutes later, while in the shower, I happened to glance up at the ceiling. Guess who was grinning down at me. FML

by ugh / 06/08/2012 at 12:35am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I were pulled over by a cop. He was still angry from our earlier argument over his constant freeloading, and when the cop told him we'd been doing 75 in a 55, he retorted, "Yeah? I did 75 in your mom last night, fuzzball." One more ticket I have to pay for. FML

by me / 05/18/2012 at 10:41pm / United States (Michigan) / Money

Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML

by Anonymous / 05/18/2012 at 10:35pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was heading to the bathroom when I clearly saw a little boy walking into my bedroom. My wife and I live alone, and I screamed at the top of my lungs, thinking he was a ghost. Turns out my wife collected him from school for a friend, and I just didn't hear them arrive. FML

by rongo12 / 05/11/2012 at 5:41pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my husband is the biological father of my baby sister. FML

by Anonymous / 05/10/2012 at 4:17pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking to my co-workers about how I've sadly been an orphan since an early age. One of them exclaimed, "Hey, just like Batman!" FML

by Nice / 05/01/2012 at 9:58am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I saw a picture of a dude on a Harley on my friend's wall. I asked her if it was Dog the bounty hunter. It wasn't, it was her aunt. FML

by GogoTheGreat / 04/23/2012 at 10:12pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I started my brand new job. I was late because while repairing my favorite pair of high heels, I got superglue in my eye. They had to scrape my cornea and I have to wear an eye patch. I'm now the "new pirate" in the office. FML

by Anonymous / 04/04/2012 at 9:41pm / United States (Georgia) / Work

Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, he called me "Mom." FML

by ohgod... / 04/01/2012 at 10:18pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy

Today, my husband and I were about to have sex. As soon as I got on top, he started speaking in a robot voice, then demanded that I call him "the Fuckinator." FML

by Anonymous / 02/22/2012 at 12:42am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, someone actually thought it was appropriate to compare my mother's death to the death of their cat. FML

Today, as I was leaving for work, I discovered my neighbor had just passed away. I found out when I came across his body lying in my front yard. FML

by Jedi2500 / 02/15/2012 at 6:53pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous