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Darth_Taco

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Darth_Taco
  • Town/Country : Los Angeles, CA, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 22 May 1990 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 84761
  • Number of comments : 137
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About Darth_Taco : I like getting a good laugh out of people's everyday lives.

Darth_Taco's last visitors

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Darth_Taco's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

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Darth_Taco's favorite FMLs

Today, after a long night of partying, I fell asleep, while my bride was delivering her vows. FML

#19761767
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5631) - you deserved it (49283)

On 06/09/2012 at 7:04pm - love - by UnluckyGroom (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I snuck out of the house for a night on the town. When I got back, I found all the doors and windows bolted shut. My sister's laughing face at my bedroom window suggests I'll be spending the rest of the night outside. FML

#19761318
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8540) - you deserved it (23778)

On 06/09/2012 at 5:15pm - misc - by cock sauce (man) - Switzerland (Luzern)

Today, I was texting my girlfriend and asked her for a picture, expecting something provocative. She sent me a picture of her holding a positive pregnancy test. We had sex once. FML

#19758301
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14284) - you deserved it (39134)

On 06/09/2012 at 12:51am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Mississippi)

Today, when I was laying in my bed, I looked on the opposite side and saw a spider the size of my palm staring at me. And if that wasn't bad, I found out it hops. I still can't find it. FML

#19756673
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25889) - you deserved it (1484)

On 06/08/2012 at 7:13pm - misc - by somebody - United States (Maryland)

Today, my sister, knowing that I'm terrified of his face, taped a picture of Michael Jackson over our toilet. When I entered the washroom, I sprinted back out screaming. Minutes later, while in the shower, I happened to glance up at the ceiling. Guess who was grinning down at me. FML

#19753089
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23220) - you deserved it (7774)

On 06/08/2012 at 12:35am - misc - by ugh - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband and I were pulled over by a cop. He was still angry from our earlier argument over his constant freeloading, and when the cop told him we'd been doing 75 in a 55, he retorted, "Yeah? I did 75 in your mom last night, fuzzball." One more ticket I have to pay for. FML

#19644251
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19603) - you deserved it (4281)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:41pm - money - by me (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML

#19644212
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19471) - you deserved it (1266)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was heading to the bathroom when I clearly saw a little boy walking into my bedroom. My wife and I live alone, and I screamed at the top of my lungs, thinking he was a ghost. Turns out my wife collected him from school for a friend, and I just didn't hear them arrive. FML

#19608158
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18950) - you deserved it (5422)

On 05/11/2012 at 5:41pm - misc - by rongo12 (man) -

Today, I found out that my husband is the biological father of my baby sister. FML

#19603084
408 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55171) - you deserved it (2954)

On 05/10/2012 at 4:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was talking to my co-workers about how I've sadly been an orphan since an early age. One of them exclaimed, "Hey, just like Batman!" FML

#19557716
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18691) - you deserved it (4135)

On 05/01/2012 at 9:58am - work - by Nice (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I saw a picture of a dude on a Harley on my friend's wall. I asked her if it was Dog the bounty hunter. It wasn't, it was her aunt. FML

Today, I started my brand new job. I was late because while repairing my favorite pair of high heels, I got superglue in my eye. They had to scrape my cornea and I have to wear an eye patch. I'm now the "new pirate" in the office. FML

#19408949
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10174) - you deserved it (14940)

On 04/04/2012 at 9:41pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, he called me "Mom." FML

#19391637
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36687) - you deserved it (2744)

On 04/01/2012 at 10:18pm - intimacy - by ohgod... - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my husband and I were about to have sex. As soon as I got on top, he started speaking in a robot voice, then demanded that I call him "the Fuckinator." FML

#19136346
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32388) - you deserved it (4806)

On 02/22/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, someone actually thought it was appropriate to compare my mother's death to the death of their cat. FML

#19125744
201 comments


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