About Darth_Taco : I like getting a good laugh out of people's everyday lives.
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Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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Darth_Taco's favorite FMLs
Today, I was the maid of honor at my sister's wedding. I was the first one to walk down the aisle, where I managed to trip over a wire, shutting off the music and falling on my face. My family cheered and took pictures. FML
by Anonymous / 07/06/2012 at 6:42am / United States / Miscellaneous
by bob / 07/03/2012 at 1:33pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
by MeanMother / 06/28/2012 at 4:29pm / United States (Missouri) / Kids
by … / 06/28/2012 at 10:20am / United States / Intimacy
Today, I was at the beach with my parents, and I went for a swim in the sea. I got out and my parents started laughing their asses off. It wasn't until my dad pulled a condom out of my hair that I realized what they were laughing at. My dad even took a picture. FML
by Anonymous / 06/26/2012 at 6:04pm / United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of) / Holidays
by stolen-car / 06/25/2012 at 10:55pm / United States (South Carolina) / Money
by Anonymous / 06/24/2012 at 1:01am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I was so out of it from a lack of sleep and an accidental antihistamine overdose, I tried to offer my cat a cup of tea, and actually got pissed off when he didn't reply. It took me a good five minutes to understand what just happened. FML
by anonymous / 06/20/2012 at 10:09am / United Kingdom / Animals
Today, I found out that the only reason why I haven't had a relationship last for more than a week the past 4 years is because of my stalker ex-girlfriend, who has been keeping other women out of my life by making up horrible stories about me. She broke up with me 5 years ago. FML
by Anonymous / 06/17/2012 at 9:55pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, my son paid the price for emulating his idols, aka the sub-human scum on Jersey Shore. He called me from jail and actually had the balls to try to guilt me into bailing him out, after he'd been arrested for punching his girlfriend at a liquor store. FML
by Anonymous / 06/15/2012 at 8:00pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids
Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML
by 16590 / 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm / Sweden / Transportation
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, saying he had to move away to be with his dad, who's just been diagnosed with cancer. After talking to his sister, I discovered that not only is his dad healthy, he's not moving away either; he's just gotten back with his ex. FML
by Anonymous / 06/10/2012 at 3:50pm / United Kingdom (Norfolk) / Love
by fernie vazquez / 06/10/2012 at 5:16am / United States (California) / Love
by UnluckyGroom / 06/09/2012 at 7:04pm / United States (Washington) / Love
- 1Today, I found out my parents have been slipping birth control pills into my morning orange juice… 2Today, I found out my husband has been catfishing my sixteen year-old brother for over a year. FML 3Today, I babysat a kid who was such a bratty little prick that I actually considered walking out on…