About Darth_Taco : I like getting a good laugh out of people's everyday lives.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Seen it!
You’ve watched 5 FML videos on the website, and commented on them.
Today, my boyfriend cutely climbed through my bedroom window for some sexy time. He decided he'd introduce bondage. As I was tied to the bed, completely naked, we heard the front door open. He got scared and left via the window, leaving me handcuffed to my bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22493) - you deserved it (5284)
On 08/11/2012 at 2:53am - intimacy - by dafuqdidihear (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my insane boss decided I poop too much. Now, every time I go to the bathroom, he follows me in and tries to get me to hurry up by reading passages from 50 Shades of Grey. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22821) - you deserved it (2188)
On 08/08/2012 at 9:53am - work - by blakeintheoffice - United States
Today, I had to scream for my dad to come help me, after I got my hair caught in a fan while trying to make the Darth Vader voice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6115) - you deserved it (20468)
Today, on more than one occasion, I was mistaken for my boyfriend's mother, by his own family. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16710) - you deserved it (1489)
On 08/02/2012 at 3:16pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I cleaned the toilet so vigorously that I snapped the handle of the brush. I laughed and told the rest of my family. Instead of joining in on the hilarity, my mother screamed, "We have had that toilet brush for twenty-six years!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19564) - you deserved it (1614)
On 08/01/2012 at 3:59am - misc - by SLAB_GIRL15 - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was speaking to my mother on the phone, when she mentioned that my dad had surprised her last week with a pearl necklace. Before I could quite grasp what was going on, I'd popped a boner and visualised the scene. What the hell is wrong with me? FML
I agree, your life sucks (7954) - you deserved it (27236)
On 07/27/2012 at 8:30pm - intimacy - by clayton (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my husband and I were watching Lord of the Rings. My husband told me he sees the eye of Sauron every time he goes down on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16527) - you deserved it (2310)
On 07/26/2012 at 10:13pm - intimacy - by LOTRfail (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, everyone found out about the strange but intense fetish I have for women physically lifting me. It all came out when my friend, a female bodybuilder, decided to grab and pick me up for a laugh. I came in my pants, in front of about twenty people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30168) - you deserved it (6963)
On 07/25/2012 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I went on a fifth date with a guy, and he asked me if we could be boyfriend and girlfriend. Just after I said yes, he pulled out a contract and asked me to sign on the dotted line. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21182) - you deserved it (2124)
On 07/25/2012 at 9:03am - love - by Unlucky (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)
Today, I received a "get well soon" card in the mail, which I found just a little odd, since I was feeling completely fine. Not an hour later, I tripped and fell down a flight of stairs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19137) - you deserved it (1402)
On 07/24/2012 at 1:36pm - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I mowed over a bird while mowing the lawn. It wasn't dead, so I had to mow over it a second time to put it out of its misery. Now there are pieces of dead bird all over my lawn and I can't sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18462) - you deserved it (11918)
On 07/23/2012 at 3:35am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8844) - you deserved it (31187)
Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (29037) - you deserved it (3192)
On 07/14/2012 at 8:50pm - intimacy - by checkup (man) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. We were under the covers, and my little brother thought we were wrestling, so he got on top of the covers and started "wrestling" with us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10467) - you deserved it (19229)
On 07/14/2012 at 3:09am - intimacy - by Leyla - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I went to the grocery store with three bags full of sausages that I'd drunkenly bought the night before. Even though the manager remembered me, he wouldn't give me a refund, and now I'll be lucky if I can pay my rent this month. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4185) - you deserved it (22214)
On 07/13/2012 at 4:13pm - misc - by minaaaaajftw (man) - Norway (Akershus)
Monday 20 May 2013
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