Darrus

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Darrus

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14778
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Darrus's page activity

Visits<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 4:19pm<b>iMuffindrops</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 5:45pm<b>b2514</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 10:26pm<b>ermagherdaturdis</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 8:17am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:15pm<b>ManiacsRose</b> - the 06/30/2011 at 3:17am<b>sterlingarcher</b> - the 03/24/2011 at 11:26pm<b>sweet_candy_</b> - the 12/21/2010 at 2:43pm<b>BlackMoon</b> - the 11/18/2010 at 7:46pm<b>SapphireSympathy</b> - the 09/04/2010 at 12:39pm<b>randomdude1234</b> - the 04/23/2010 at 4:24am<b>gr3y</b> - the 04/18/2010 at 10:57am<b>sebastianhs</b> - the 03/28/2010 at 2:15am<b>DogmaT</b> - the 03/01/2010 at 10:09pm<b>Isabella_r38</b> - the 02/28/2010 at 1:38am<b>Averizzle</b> - the 02/20/2010 at 11:02am<b>girlygirl666</b> - the 02/16/2010 at 12:13am<b>aDropOfSunshine</b> - the 02/14/2010 at 8:33am

Darrus's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Darrus's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my neighbor ordered parking tickets for everyone on the block. My car was 4 inches into his driveway, but not obstructing his exit in any way. That didn't stop him from calling in, on a Sunday, at 8 AM, an 88 dollar ticket. He also left a note "Your parking sucks, love, Greg." FML

by notgreg / 11/10/2009 at 10:59am / United States (California) / Money

Today, I was falling asleep on my desk, my head on my fist. My elbow slipped off the edge of the desk and I punched myself, leaving a fist mark on my cheek. At school, people think my parents hit me. My parents think I'm getting bullied at school. No one believes the actual story. FML

Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML

by birdbath / 11/08/2009 at 2:26am / United States (Minnesota) / Animals

Today, my husband left his cell phone at home. I looked through his contacts and found a person named "The Bitch." Being a very curious person, I decided to call "The Bitch" to see who it was. My phone rang. FML

by badwife / 11/07/2009 at 5:22am / Japan / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend of three years broke up with me because she found a lot of red lipstick on my neck. The red lipstick was from her lipstick because she came over in the middle of the night when she was really drunk, then left. She refuses to listen to me. FML

by Anonymous / 11/06/2009 at 12:50pm / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, I found out that our water tank has had a dead crow rotting in it for days. I took showers and brushed my teeth with dead crow soup. FML

by aqua88 / 11/05/2009 at 10:26am / Malaysia (Selangor) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally got the courage to go on a first date with this guy I had a crush on for months. It was such a big deal for me cause it was my first date ever. The first thing he says when we met was "I have to take a dump." I sat by myself for 10 minutes. FML

by dumper / 11/05/2009 at 1:41am / United States / Love

Today, my parents, who are divorced, were arguing over who has to pay for my bus pass. They decided they wouldn't pay unless the other one did too. Neither will pay the £60 it'll cost for my bus pass. I now have to walk to school every day, in freezing winter weather. It's 9 miles. Each way. FML

by Walker / 11/04/2009 at 3:00pm / United Kingdom (Coventry) / Transportation

Today, I had a blind date that my friend set me up for. My date was the ugliest, most disgusting person you will ever meet, but I thought that I would give him a chance. He saw me, eyed me up and down, then said to my friend "You're kidding, right?" FML

by BlackCheetah101 / 11/04/2009 at 1:51am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, a Milkbone commercial came on TV. At the end of it, they whistle and throw a Milkbone across the screen, prompting my 100lb German Shepherd to leap off the couch and run head on into my new plasma screen TV. FML

by doglover / 11/03/2009 at 1:11pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my aunt came into the world. My 67 year-old grandfather married a 24 year-old woman who just gave birth to my new aunt, who is 18 years younger than me. FML

by notsohappyniece / 11/02/2009 at 11:10am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friends created a fake Facebook profile of a girl, and asked me to be in a relationship. Even my friends think I can't get a real girlfriend, and need a fake one to feel better. FML

by chocolaterabbit / 11/02/2009 at 7:41am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was telling my teenage daughter about the effects from alcohol, and how she should not give in to peer pressure. While talking, I noticed that she was looking at me funny. There was a wine glass in my hand. FML

by alcoholic / 10/31/2009 at 10:30am / Estonia (Harjumaa) / Health

Today, I invited my very animal phobic boyfriend over. I have a dog and a rabbit, who are always well behaved so I insisted they wouldn't do him any harm. My dog peed all over his shoes and my rabbit furiously humped his leg and wouldn't let go. He's now even more terrified of animals. FML

by Anon / 10/31/2009 at 7:08am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Love

Today, at my school's Midnight Madness, I was selected to show my school spirit in a contest. Being drunk, I decided to hump the school mascot in front of 300 people. FML

by skyhawk13 / 10/30/2009 at 1:11am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous