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DarkpawTehWolf

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DarkpawTehWolf

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1558
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>FireBitten</b> - the 11/20/2013 at 4:33am<b>Doritozilla</b> - the 08/25/2013 at 2:03am<b>dead_insects</b> - the 06/14/2013 at 3:25am

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DarkpawTehWolf's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at work talking to an older man. As our conversation ended, he said, "Thank you, ma'am." Then, he quickly stumbled over his words as he said, "I mean, thank you, sir. I meant sir. I think." He gazed at me for a moment in confusion, then darted away. FML

Today, I found out my work gave me a vacation for my performance. It's a trip to somewhere in the Caribbean, with the nickname "The Sunniest Place on Earth." I have skin cancer. FML

#20706766
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51023) - you deserved it (3738)

On 06/05/2013 at 12:22am - health - by TooSunnyForSkin - United States (Indiana)

Today, I took a dump in the woods at a secluded lake. I used the leaves of a seemingly harmless tree to clean myself. However, I was unaware that the leaf was poisonous. It feels like a thousand hornets are attacking my ass-crack. FML

#20705435
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32855) - you deserved it (48165)

On 06/04/2013 at 1:15pm - health - by poisonivyretard (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I had to walk home in the rain because my mom didn't want to get her new car wet. FML

#20705347
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56806) - you deserved it (3652)

On 06/04/2013 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

#20705129
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30836) - you deserved it (65643)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)

Today, my 6-year-old son was so angry at me for not buying him overpriced candy at the airport, that he told a security guard I had a machine gun in my suitcase. The interrogation was not pleasant. FML

#20703790
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60896) - you deserved it (7629)

On 06/03/2013 at 5:16pm - kids - by VDM (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my parents blew my entire college fund in their quest to finish building their replica Hobbit house in our back yard. FML

#20703566
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59922) - you deserved it (5883)

On 06/03/2013 at 3:22pm - money - by future burger flipper (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I had to pee in my cat's litter box, just to avoid witnessing my mom having sex in the living room on my way to the bathroom. FML

#20702750
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72710) - you deserved it (5806)

On 06/03/2013 at 1:47am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, while at my aunt's funeral, my grandma who has terrible memory loss asked me whose funeral we were at. I had to explain to her that her daughter had died. FML

#20702720
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82225) - you deserved it (3499)

On 06/03/2013 at 1:32am - misc - by Me - United States (Illinois)

Today, feeling the need to spice things up in our sex life, I dressed up in my husband's navy uniform jacket, hat, and a pair of heels. When he came into the room, he took one look at me and started laughing uncontrollably. FML

#20702628
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55427) - you deserved it (16841)

On 06/03/2013 at 12:41am - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my dad watched his first Lord of the Rings marathon. Now he keeps spouting lines from the movies, and thought it'd be funny to hide in my closet, just to jump out at me while screaming, "My precious!" FML

#20701776
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43078) - you deserved it (6990)

On 06/02/2013 at 6:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Thurrock)

Today, my step-dad's three year old granddaughter slept over. She insisted she didn't need a diaper to go to sleep and they put her in my bed with me, actually believing that she didn't need a diaper. Not only did she kick me all night, but I had the joy of waking up to her peeing on me. FML

#20700710
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45029) - you deserved it (5189)

On 06/02/2013 at 4:29am - kids - by samabomination - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I accidentally hit someone's car while at the supermarket. I left a note, went shopping, and when I came back my windows were shattered, my tires were slashed and "f you" was written on my windshield. FML

#20700486
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46377) - you deserved it (14416)

On 06/02/2013 at 1:20am - misc - by anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that my parents were artists when they met. My mom said that I was one of their best projects yet. My sister, hearing what my mother said, broke my week-old PS3 in a rage. FML

#20699851
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48405) - you deserved it (3479)

On 06/01/2013 at 7:31pm - misc - by H1dd3n (man) - United States (California)

Today, I realised half my underpants were missing. In related news, my slob of a housemate hasn't washed hers in several weeks, and has been stealing mine. FML

#20699444
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43950) - you deserved it (3366)

On 06/01/2013 at 2:52pm - misc - by WHOO HOO AIDS (woman) - Poland (Mazowieckie)



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