You know...there's some really fucked up people here. My kind of website.
DarkMirror: Spreader of Badassery (you have no idea how long it takes me to right a check)
Interests: reading, writing, swimming, youtubing, and listening to music (normally rock like Three Days Grace, MCR, Queen, Breaking Benjamin, Led Zeppelin, etc. but I'll listen to anything). Oh yeah, and just being plain weird.
angel_dust_330@yahoo.com
katluvsu@live.com
- talk to me if your funny, sarcastic, bitchy, bored, or all around awesome like me xD (yeah I wish)
Today, I came home at noon from a long night out. I was surprised to see a woman I didn't recognize standing in my living room in a brown dress and heels. As I walked up to the door and knocked to be let in, the woman whipped around and I figured out who it was. My dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36578) - you totally deserved it (1514)
On 08/04/2009 at 4:40am - misc - by superfiedman (man) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I was getting mugged. In shock, I said, "Are you mugging me?!" To which the mugger responded, "Duh, do you think I grabbed you for your looks?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (33894) - you totally deserved it (4229)
On 08/04/2009 at 2:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I went to a bookstore and asked the sales woman,"Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10437) - you totally deserved it (27131)
On 08/04/2009 at 12:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, my brother's best friend spent the night and was changing with the door partially open. He's super hot and as I was watching him change, he sneezed. Forgetting he didn't know I was watching him, I said bless you. He called me a freak, slammed the door in my face and told my parents. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6311) - you totally deserved it (65542)
On 08/02/2009 at 6:03pm - misc - by jeeperspeepers (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I witnessed a horrible car accident and was interviewed by the local news. During the interview I said, "It was terrible. It was like watching a silent movie... but there was sound!" The interview has been aired 6 times. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12744) - you totally deserved it (38414)
On 06/04/2009 at 9:07pm - misc - by LadyChristina25 - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, at a party, my three friends and I thought it would be fun to urinate in a jug. We dislike the neighbours, so decided to throw the contents of the jug over the fence into their garden. It hit a tree and splashed back. I ended up covered in our piss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3484) - you totally deserved it (83304)
On 06/04/2009 at 6:38am - misc - by Unluggee (woman) - United Kingdom (Liverpool)
Today, I meant to express to my friends that I was enamored with a young saleswoman I had encountered at a store. I wanted to tell them that she was quite petite and that I am, in general, attracted to petite women. Instead I said "You know? I like little girls." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10052) - you totally deserved it (34855)
On 06/03/2009 at 1:23am - love - by boinger (man) - United States (California)
Today, I had to rub my turtle's anus with a wet Q-tip, which is supposed to help with his constipation. I think he liked it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42539) - you totally deserved it (6112)
On 06/02/2009 at 3:07am - misc - by haniii (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was getting it on with my cute guy friend in his candlelit bedroom and we had just started tearing each other's clothes off. I decided to be coy and sexy and flip my hair to the side. As I did so, my long hair caught in the flames of his lit candles and caught half of my head on fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42374) - you totally deserved it (20589)
On 06/01/2009 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Bawo (woman) - United States (Utah)
Today, while shopping in the FML store I bought the "Retro Sport Tee," I didn't notice you are suppose to put your own "FML" on the shirt. Mine says "Today, Your Text Here FML." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11968) - you totally deserved it (45456)
On 05/31/2009 at 8:03am - misc - by deucelututi - United States (New York)
Today, I tried to imitate Mary Poppins by jumping off a shed with an umbrella. I spent the next 3 hours in the emergency room. My leg is broken. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5124) - you totally deserved it (101331)
On 05/29/2009 at 11:04pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, while waitressing at the Mexican restaurant I work at, a customer walks up and asks me why an Asian is working at a Mexican restaurant. I say I don't know and he then starts calling me many derogatory Asian names and leaves. Funny thing is I'm not at all asian. I'm Mexican. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36623) - you totally deserved it (1433)
On 05/29/2009 at 12:42am - work - by Via_Baudelaire (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I learned to never blast classic rock with your convertible's top down while passing an SUV full of gangbanger wanna-bes. That is, of course, unless you want your immaculate, newly detailed leather seats to be decorated with pretty brown and white milkshake stains. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32733) - you totally deserved it (4728)
On 05/29/2009 at 12:08am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)
Today, I was getting my first tattoo done. My parents told me it was a bad idea. My friends' parents told me it was a bad idea. I told them that people get tattoos done all the time and nothing goes wrong. 50 min into the tattoo on my back, the artist says "Oh shit, shit, shit. We can fix this." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20756) - you totally deserved it (30632)
On 05/28/2009 at 2:15pm - misc - by thats_not_good (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was taking calls at the helpdesk I work at. The caller was a man, and while helping him with his issue he suddenly stopped to tell me I had a nice soothing voice. Then he told me to say something else. As I continued to help him, he started making moaning noises. I'm a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38420) - you totally deserved it (1505)
On 05/28/2009 at 12:52pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
