About DarkJoy : I have a BA in English, but try not to correct grammar unless I am being a bitch. I am currently in law school. I can be a total bitch even though most of the time I try to play nice . I feel like this site brings out the bitchy side of me though. I have a kick ass boyfriend and 2 awesome dogs. That's all anyone needs to know.
Shout out to Pendatik, Twinkle and Raleigh.
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Today, I hurried into the bank to cash in the $5,000 check my grandparents had given me for college money. I found out that instead of my name, they wrote 'our sweet iddle pumpkinbutt'. I couldn't make eye contact with anyone after. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17947) - you deserved it (3177)
On 01/17/2010 at 4:08pm - misc - by pumpkinbutt - Sent from mobile version
Today, my grandma told me to fuck off when I tried to help her with the dishes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22970) - you deserved it (4696)
On 01/17/2010 at 1:31am - love - by volleyballgirl12 - Sent from mobile version
Today, I found my beloved hamster, Toofie. Toofie escaped from his cage. 4 years ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25907) - you deserved it (3405)
On 01/16/2010 at 4:36pm - animals - by riptoofie (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, this huge wasp started flying around me. I freaked out and started running from it. Then I slipped, landed face-first in some dog poo, and got stung by the wasp on my leg. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20928) - you deserved it (5135)
On 01/16/2010 at 1:46pm - animals - by life_sucks (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, I went to an amusement park with my family. A couple of cute girls started talking to me, telling me how much they liked my dreads. Seeing this, my mother stepped up next to me, patted me on the shoulder, and said, "This here is my little baby, treat him nicely!" Thanks, Mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21332) - you deserved it (2902)
On 01/15/2010 at 2:37pm - misc - by Dreadge (man) - Israel (Hefa)
Today, while at work at a maternity and baby clothes store, I was supposed to send out an email about our "Beat the Clock" sale. After it was sent to over 500 people, I realized that I'd misspelled the subject line. It read, "Beat the Cock Sale." FML
I agree, your life sucks (9209) - you deserved it (20494)
On 01/14/2010 at 10:55am - work - by Oops (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I went on a blind date. We were walking in the park and I noticed a funny smell. I looked down and realized I stepped in dog crap. I tried to nonchalantly rub it off on the grass, but instead hit a patch of wet grass and slipped onto my butt, right into a pile of goose poop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22752) - you deserved it (3447)
On 01/13/2010 at 3:07am - love - by Juanna (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I found out the guy I've been seeing for 3 months lives at home with his parents. He's 30. They live in a '50+ only' housing complex and he sneaks in the side door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21432) - you deserved it (2731)
On 01/13/2010 at 1:11am - love - by ilu.xo (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, at a bar, a woman approched me and tried to set me up with her friend. Looking around, the only people in the bar were a man reading the paper and a very ugly woman, looking at me and smiling. I worriedly replied, "I'm sorry, but I'm gay." Turns out her friend was the one reading the paper. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8123) - you deserved it (26604)
On 01/12/2010 at 5:26am - love - by awkward23 (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was sent to the hospital for being knocked out with a potato. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22614) - you deserved it (3232)
On 01/11/2010 at 10:40pm - health - by brileyyyy - United States (Missouri)
Today, I walked in on my parents necking in the living room. I promptly covered my eyes and muttered something about my innocence being stolen from me. My dad looked up from the couch, and mentioned that he had heard my innocence being stolen by Jake, my boyfriend from 2 years ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5947) - you deserved it (25103)
On 01/11/2010 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was on a long-haul plane journey home from my holiday. After 5 hours, I decided to stretch my arms whilst watching a movie. Little did I know that a little girl was approaching, running down the aisle as my arm stretched out. I accidentally clothes-lined a little 9 year old girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20532) - you deserved it (2615)
On 01/07/2010 at 7:25pm - misc - by James4929 (man) - United Kingdom
Today, my best friend was texting me about her sick dog. She wrote "Do you think she will get better?", so I wrote "I hope she does". It wasn't until later that I realized I accidentally wrote "I hope she dies" instead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24046) - you deserved it (6546)
On 01/04/2010 at 10:32pm - animals - by poordog (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31314) - you deserved it (15045)
On 12/31/2009 at 3:04pm - love - by pottypattypeepants (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was at work and I had to take a dump. Since I was the only person in the bathroom, I started singing, "I'm taking a poopy-poop poop poop poop." I was not the only person in the bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6027) - you deserved it (43495)
On 12/31/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Monday 20 May 2013
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