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DarkJediLove

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DarkJediLove

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DarkJediLove
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1507
  • Number of comments : 43
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About DarkJediLove : Pretty much Forest Gumping my way through life. So if there is something you think you can add, please do say hi!

DarkJediLove's page activity

Visits<b>flupsht</b> - 22 hours ago<b>PleasantDino</b> - yesterday at 12:57pm<b>thejonac</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 10:23am<b>natalea_rae</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:38pm<b>mineller</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 10:37am<b>Galacticain</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 12:50am<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 4:23pm<b>kinzopinzi</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 8:56am<b>hard_candy</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 10:06pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 2:05pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 11:48pm<b>LittleRed79</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 1:08pm<b>imthatperson1993</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 2:28am<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 2:12am<b>Marie54321</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 12:47am<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 9:41pm<b>emilyrrobbins</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 11:27pm<b>ARetardedSeal</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 9:51pm

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DarkJediLove's favorite FMLs

Today, my fiancé paid a visit to my parents so he could ask my dad's permission to marry me. My dad responded with, "Why buy the cow when you can milk it for free?" FML

#20757403
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51217) - you deserved it (4315)

On 07/01/2013 at 2:38am - love - by Gracie-Ann (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

#20711208
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55151) - you deserved it (64261)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my parents asked me if I was sexually active. My grandma then screamed from upstairs, "She's not even physically active!" FML

#20548943
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48362) - you deserved it (14419)

On 03/18/2013 at 4:59am - intimacy - by Susan (woman) - Ireland

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. In the entrance way I felt a slight tugging on my jeans. Used to my Doberman tugging when he wants to play, I shoved hard with my foot. I successfully punted their Chihuahua off the ground and into the next room where it landed with a thud. FML

#20460283
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19801) - you deserved it (36474)

On 01/15/2013 at 2:33am - animals - by I think its dead (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my dog did something I had no idea he could do. He participated in an all-male three-way at the dog park. In front of everyone. FML

#20199452
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23337) - you deserved it (2388)

On 12/10/2012 at 7:04pm - animals - by MoreActionThanMe - United States

Today, while walking on a nearly empty street, my friend dared me to slap a tall muscular chick on the butt and run away. I went and did it, but before I even had a chance to turn and run, she grabbed me, bent me over her knee and spanked me until I cried. My friend filmed it. FML

#20130842
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7014) - you deserved it (46746)

On 10/24/2012 at 1:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after great sex with my boyfriend, I lay in my bed while he went to get a drink from downstairs. Hearing someone come up, I shouted out as a joke, "Damn babe, I'm covered in cum, was there a hole you didn't fill?" It wasn't my boyfriend, it was my dad. FML

#20109762
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16162) - you deserved it (61037)

On 10/09/2012 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by cumhole (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned that I'm expecting twins. A boy and a girl. My husband, upon finding out about this, immediately suggested that we give them Star Wars names. But not Luke and Leia. Oh no. He wants to name them Darth and Vayda. And he is absolutely serious about this. FML

#20068529
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24011) - you deserved it (3663)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:03am - kids - by AGeeksWife (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my fully grown, 90-pound German Shepherd sniffed and wagged his tail as a guy mugged me. FML

#20054806
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23879) - you deserved it (2085)

On 09/02/2012 at 10:07pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after sex, my boyfriend and I lay in bed for a couple of hours just chatting. This would have been lovely. However, his topic of choice for post-coital pillow talk was his theory about how Chewbacca is secretly the leader of the Rebel Alliance. It actually made sense. FML

#20020311
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24327) - you deserved it (6889)

On 08/14/2012 at 8:17am - intimacy - by cl4ptp (woman) - United Kingdom (Vale of Glamorgan, The)

Today, my wife yelled at me for admitting I take my wedding ring off at work. I explained that I work in a chemistry lab and don't want to damage it. She laughed and said, "Oh please, that chemistry stuff is nonsense anyway." All while reading her horoscope. FML

#20010086
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28188) - you deserved it (3390)

On 08/08/2012 at 7:03pm - love - by Dumbfounded - United States (Texas)

Today, at my job, an old lady kept calling her inhaler a blow job. I kindly explained to her why she couldn't call her inhaler that. She continued to ask me for a blow job in front of visitors. I had to say yes. FML

#19986519
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27580) - you deserved it (2366)

On 07/27/2012 at 12:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, at work in a nursing home, I had to kill imaginary dogs in the lunch room, because they were evil and trying to eat everyone. This started with just one person seeing them, to all 30 of them screaming and freaking out. I spent 45 minutes killing imaginary dogs. FML

#19983789
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27042) - you deserved it (2090)

On 07/25/2012 at 5:05pm - work - by justlittleoldme - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML

#19942412
373 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35252) - you deserved it (3247)

On 07/15/2012 at 7:13pm - kids - by Zora (man) - Norway (Hordaland)



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