Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

DarkDaedalus009

Search for a member

DarkDaedalus009

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 17 November 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 948
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About DarkDaedalus009 : I took a shit

DarkDaedalus009's page activity

Visits<b>nothemother</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 11:44am<b>Spartancjm</b> - the 09/16/2013 at 2:07am<b>Mornai</b> - the 05/16/2013 at 3:25am<b>Shannonbena</b> - the 01/04/2013 at 1:41am<b>sillyyanks</b> - the 10/09/2012 at 5:31pm<b>pink_raindrops</b> - the 10/09/2012 at 3:03pm

DarkDaedalus009's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of DarkDaedalus009's badges

DarkDaedalus009's favorite FMLs

Today, after rolling my car on the highway, I witnessed several people stop and get out of their cars to take pictures. No one asked if I was okay, and I was the one who had to call 911 for myself. FML

#19988721
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29829) - you deserved it (2110)

On 07/28/2012 at 5:56am - health - by Insomniac (woman) - United States (Alaska)

Today, while in the store with my kids, they wanted to buy tampons because I am "getting cranky, and it should be that time of the month." FML

#19988318
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9827) - you deserved it (18911)

On 07/28/2012 at 12:17am - kids - by love_to_live - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my neighbor called me on vacation to tell me that she let my mother into my house to feed my fish. I don't have fish, and my mother passed away 3 years ago. FML

#19978365
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31574) - you deserved it (2132)

On 07/22/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by My_Name_Is_Zach -

Today, I told my boyfriend that I didn't want to go out with him because I was having a fat day. After ten minutes of fighting, he threw a ring box on the floor and stormed out. I basically refused his proposal because of my body issues. FML

#19977285
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9326) - you deserved it (62584)

On 07/22/2012 at 9:33pm - love - by henley -

Today, I nailed every single move in my routine at a gymnastics competition. I then finished off with a perfect split, letting out a fart loud enough to wake up a kid in China. FML

#19928978
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33398) - you deserved it (2844)

On 07/12/2012 at 4:35pm - misc - by LetItRip - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)

Today, while I was on the floor stocking a bottom shelf, a man walked up behind me and humped the back of my head. He ran away laughing. This kind of shit happens all the time. I hate my job. FML

#19218186
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28102) - you deserved it (2528)

On 03/05/2012 at 12:12am - work - by cero_kewl - United States

Today, whilst nibbling on my husband's ear, I swallowed a lump of his earwax. FML

#14986533
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38795) - you deserved it (22531)

On 02/15/2011 at 3:34am - intimacy - by Emily Salt -

Today, while eating dinner with my family, I found out my boyfriend recorded me screaming while having sex with him on my phone, and set it as my ring tone on high volume. FML

#13822314
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32886) - you deserved it (5551)

On 11/13/2010 at 12:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned that you should never, ever, under any circumstance, take a laxative and a sleeping pill on the same night. FML

#11281809
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10974) - you deserved it (51189)

On 06/18/2010 at 1:42am - health - by emilygreeny - United States

Today, I found out that my brother was selling pictures of me showering. For what? World of Warcraft money. FML

#4073449
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66823) - you deserved it (4386)

On 07/27/2009 at 3:32am - misc - by Anon (woman) - Singapore

Today, I was lying in bed, trying to sleep, when I heard my parents having sex, so I put on my headphones. After listening to music for a good long while, I figured they were done by now, so I took off the headphones just in time to hear them finish. FML

#3934975
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67717) - you deserved it (5088)

On 07/21/2009 at 5:38pm - intimacy - by Headphones (man) - United States

Today, I was down at Disney World. Me and my buddy decided to take our pictures in a photobooth. While in the tiny space, I thought it'd be funny to flash the camera. A women barged in as soon as I did so, screaming "You know there's an outside video feed, right!?" FML

#3102076
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10244) - you deserved it (59877)

On 06/21/2009 at 9:15pm - misc - by TheFlash (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was down at Disney World. Me and my buddy decided to take our pictures in a photobooth. While in the tiny space, I thought it'd be funny to flash the camera. A women barged in as soon as I did so, screaming "You know there's an outside video feed, right!?" FML

#3102076
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10244) - you deserved it (59877)

On 06/21/2009 at 9:15pm - misc - by TheFlash (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was down at Disney World. Me and my buddy decided to take our pictures in a photobooth. While in the tiny space, I thought it'd be funny to flash the camera. A women barged in as soon as I did so, screaming "You know there's an outside video feed, right!?" FML

#3102076
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10244) - you deserved it (59877)

On 06/21/2009 at 9:15pm - misc - by TheFlash (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML

#361047
1250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (667909) - you deserved it (449109)

On 03/15/2009 at 10:20pm - misc - by KAAALIS (woman) - United States (New York)



FML's blog

  • Malec's illustrated FML
  • Life is like a box of chocolate full of piece of rabbit droppings sometimes, isn't it? OK, I'll admit that's a weird way to start an article a few days before Christmas. Let me explain: you try and get…

Friday 12 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: