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DarkCaesar

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DarkCaesar

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 12707
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About DarkCaesar : I'd like to think I'm an interesting guy, but I'm still pretty awkward.

DarkCaesar's page activity

Visits<b>CruelGuy</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 1:20pm<b>Blue_Black</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 8:54pm<b>nyancait</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 4:23pm<b>JoMama_0924</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 11:32pm<b>4WARD</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 10:18am<b>MARGIE9</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 5:50pm<b>7Maverick</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 10:45pm<b>HotShot313</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 1:18am<b>ckirksey</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 10:46pm<b>Becca_Bear_98</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 10:13pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 6:23pm<b>DontMindMeAtAll</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 1:45pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 9:48pm<b>crystalxa</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 9:39am<b>miiapaige</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 11:24am<b>Ezedaya</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 5:35pm<b>kroney1</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 3:09am<b>greeneyebeauty9</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 12:21am

DarkCaesar's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

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DarkCaesar's favorite FMLs

Today, I had my midterm finals for AP Literature. My teacher had good news and bad news for us. The bad news? That he lost the file for our original exam and so had to make a harder exam for us. An exam he told us not to study for. The good news? "Jesus Christ suffered and died for our sins." FML

#21319606
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20356) - you deserved it (1739)

On 12/18/2014 at 7:11am - misc - by Overachieving Loser (woman) - Guam

Today, my mother-in-law asked for a copy of my son's death certificate so she could have her week-long island beach holiday classed as bereavement leave. FML

Today, half of my motivation to stop drinking is so that my tolerance will go down, because I currently can't actually afford enough alcohol to get even tipsy anymore. FML

#21319263
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18267) - you deserved it (7490)

On 12/17/2014 at 5:41pm - health - by Recovering Alcoholic - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I felt a horrible pain while having sex with my wife, and I had to stop. I thought it was a hernia or something, but she called me a liar and accused me of everything from not finding her attractive, to me cheating on her. It turned out I had appendicitis. She still won't apologize. FML

#21319192
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29091) - you deserved it (1908)

On 12/17/2014 at 3:09pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I took a crap. When I stood up to admire my handiwork and flush, I noticed blood-red everywhere in the toilet. I freaked out like a little girl, thinking I was bleeding out of my ass. Then I noticed the ketchup packets my roommate had slipped under the seat to prank me. FML

#21319149
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22371) - you deserved it (4210)

On 12/17/2014 at 1:47pm - misc - by RIP Turd (peacebeuponit) (man) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, I decided to splurge and get valet parking at a fancy restaurant. I got out of the car and gave the man my keys and watched as he slowly backed my car into another car. FML

#21319039
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25731) - you deserved it (2426)

On 12/17/2014 at 8:33am - misc - by seriously - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mother-in-law gave me a toaster and a fork as a wedding gift. FML

#21318970
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24575) - you deserved it (2221)

On 12/17/2014 at 2:35am - love - by monster in law. - United States

Today, my boss heard a rumor that I was in a relationship with a fellow co-worker. He assured me that inside relationships weren't against any store policy, so I confirmed it. He then fired my boyfriend anyway. FML

#21318814
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24612) - you deserved it (3803)

On 12/16/2014 at 10:31pm - work - by thankssomuch - United States (Maine)

Today, my parents decided to "discipline" my kitten by spraying her with water. This somehow managed to completely un-train her, and now she's back to being the compulsive biter she was when I first brought her home. FML

#21318466
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24515) - you deserved it (2655)

On 12/16/2014 at 10:01am - animals - by scars - United States (Illinois)

Today, I asked my spouse to help me apply some hemorrhoid relief cream, since I couldn't see what was going on down there clearly. Next time, I hope I'll remember if I'm still in a conference call with my online classmates so they don't witness the whole thing again. FML

Today, I blew my load in less than a minute. I wasn't having sex or even making out. I was spooning. FML

#21318416
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27986) - you deserved it (5282)

On 12/16/2014 at 7:01am - intimacy - by Extravirgin (man) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I found out my Nan passed away. My boyfriend came over to comfort me, things got intimate and we ended up having sex. After he came, he chuckled to himself and said, "That one's for you, Nan". FML

Today, my mom told me how lucky I was to inherit her "asymptomatic" periods. It's true, I don't get cramps, bloating or mood swings with my periods. Nope, just excruciatingly painful diarrhea. Thanks, mom. FML

#21318154
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26399) - you deserved it (2219)

On 12/15/2014 at 8:23pm - misc - by period_probs (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my classmate said I looked better without makeup. Well, her exact words were, "You look like less of a whore without makeup." FML

Today, my cat let out the biggest moan I have ever heard, while we were both in the living room. My dad heard and accused me of watching porn. FML

#21317874
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28012) - you deserved it (2409)

On 12/15/2014 at 11:07am - animals - by Anonymous - Australia



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