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DarkCaesar

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DarkCaesar

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3293
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About DarkCaesar : I'd like to think I'm an interesting guy, but I'm still pretty awkward.

DarkCaesar's page activity

Visits<b>CruelGuy</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 1:07pm<b>4WARD</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 10:18am<b>MARGIE9</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 5:50pm<b>nyancait</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 1:07pm<b>7Maverick</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 10:45pm<b>HotShot313</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 1:18am<b>ckirksey</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 10:46pm<b>Becca_Bear_98</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 10:13pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 6:23pm<b>DontMindMeAtAll</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 1:45pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 9:48pm<b>crystalxa</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 9:39am<b>miiapaige</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 11:24am<b>Ezedaya</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 5:35pm<b>kroney1</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 3:09am<b>greeneyebeauty9</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 12:21am<b>yourfullname</b> - the 12/12/2013 at 12:59am<b>VivaLaColdplay</b> - the 12/03/2013 at 1:42pm

DarkCaesar's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of DarkCaesar's badges

DarkCaesar's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally got to watch some porn after not being able to for a while. All I could notice in the video was how badly the participants were playing snooker. FML

#21250464
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12593) - you deserved it (3077)

On 09/02/2014 at 11:49am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I asked my girlfriend to talk dirty to me. Her response was to impersonate a saxophone. FML

#21250455
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14502) - you deserved it (3087)

On 09/02/2014 at 11:32am - intimacy - by ihatejasonderulo - United Kingdom (Hounslow)

Today, I went out with my best friend to McDonald's for a late night snack. Turns out she lied to me and just used me to pick up the boy she likes so they could go stargazing. I'm now laying beside them as they look at the stars and make out. I just want fries. FML

#21249351
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33544) - you deserved it (3400)

On 08/31/2014 at 10:55pm - love - by emilyparker - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was called in over speakers at the airport. The man who was speaking clearly and nearly burst out laughing when he said my name. Soon, a few people around also snickered when they heard it. I had to wait five minutes before I could casually stand up. My last name is Bastard. FML

#21248318
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36283) - you deserved it (2917)

On 08/30/2014 at 4:35am - misc - by poorbastard (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I almost got lucky with a girl from my course. We've been flirting since we met. After removing her top and moving downwards with my tongue, whilst moaning my name she decided to mention she has a boyfriend and that we needed to stop. FML

#21248283
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38525) - you deserved it (4053)

On 08/30/2014 at 2:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I got a job. My parents have decided it's now a better idea to take money from my paycheck instead of grounding me. FML

Today, it was my great aunt's funeral. We all had to wait two hours for the service to begin, because they forgot to dig the grave. FML

#21247920
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33824) - you deserved it (2104)

On 08/29/2014 at 2:54pm - misc - by abbshows (man) - United States

Today, my parents sat me down and told me that I'm adopted. I took it in stride, and reassured them that as far as I'm concerned, they're my true parents. That annoyed them. Apparently the whole thing was a prank for a YouTube video, which I ruined by not crying or freaking out. FML

#21247893
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39871) - you deserved it (2609)

On 08/29/2014 at 2:09pm - kids - by hannahka (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it's been three weeks since my dad finished growing what he calls a "Jesus beard" and gone out asking for donations and claiming to be Jesus Christ. I've been trying and failing to get a job for 2 years, and he's already raking in cash from gullible idiots. FML

#21247834
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32733) - you deserved it (2986)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after moving into my new house, I woke up to strange sounds coming from the kitchen. I panicked and started sobbing, convinced it was either a robbery or a home invasion. Turned out it was just my cat. FML

#21247811
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25191) - you deserved it (9614)

On 08/29/2014 at 11:38am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I dreamed I was wrestling an alligator. I quickly woke up to my girlfriend yelling and me holding her in a headlock. FML

#21247589
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34304) - you deserved it (4721)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16am - misc - by AgentOrion - United States (Alabama)

Today, my boyfriend was stroking my stomach and looking into my eyes. It was very romantic, until he grabbed my love handles and said, "Mmmm... bacon..." FML

#21247445
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32262) - you deserved it (4379)

On 08/28/2014 at 9:47pm - love - by ch4nny (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after coming home from a two week vacation, my dog was pink, there were beer bottles and used condoms on my bed, and everything was a mess. I asked my sister, who'd been watching over the place, what had happened. She just said "Oops." and hung up. FML

#21246633
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34915) - you deserved it (3183)

On 08/27/2014 at 6:52pm - misc - by nayahbear24 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, it's been a few months since my grandfather passed away. Now all of his porn subscriptions are getting forwarded to my address. FML

#21246620
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33849) - you deserved it (2737)

On 08/27/2014 at 6:03pm - misc - by dr.mantistobagon (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I bought some noise-canceling headphones. They work well. Too well. My mom came home, unpacked her shopping, walked upstairs, knocked on my door, opened my door, and found me jacking off to a porno, all without me hearing a thing. Fucking hell. FML

#21246585
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32079) - you deserved it (30285)

On 08/27/2014 at 5:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)



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