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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Danny_Cannibal

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Danny_Cannibal
  • Town/Country : Vancouver, Canada
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 15 March 1992 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 257
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About Danny_Cannibal : I'm an odd one... I enjoy most everything. Mark Twain's is my third favorite moustache, Nikola Tesla's is my second. I go lawnmower shopping even though I live in a one-bedroom apartment... I have a serious addiciton to Zombies...it's unhealthy, like seriously; I have a legitimate problem... My Best friend is covered in hair and has breath like cooked squirrell-meat. His name is henry, he's mah Puppeh-dog... well...puppeh-horse. He weighs a hundred and fifty lbs...

This website makes me feel better about my life. (Especially my sex life...according to fml.com, I have the best sex on earth... >.>)

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Danny_Cannibal's favorite FMLs

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. Halfway through he asked me what day it was. I told him, "Friday." He jumped up and ran over to the TV yelling, "Oh my God! Shark week is almost over!!" I was cock-blocked by the Discovery Channel. FML

#4359063 (224)

I agree, your life sucks (37806) - you deserved it (5759)

On 08/07/2009 at 11:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, in the midst of foreplay, this girl tells me I am so hot, I respond "Ditto." She heatedly responds "I love ditto," to which I suavely reply "I didn't know you were into Pokemon. That may make you even sexier." She knows nothing about Pokemon, but I sure know how to kill the mood. FML

#3971030 (321)

I agree, your life sucks (12878) - you deserved it (53052)

On 07/23/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by MitchFail (man) - United States

Today, was my boyfriends birthday. He wanted a blowjob while playing Call of Duty 4. In typical gamer fashion, he slammed his controller down when he died. Into my head. FML

#3078421 (383)

I agree, your life sucks (49825) - you deserved it (19634)

On 06/21/2009 at 12:16am - intimacy - by jinxofsocal (woman) - United States (California)