About Dan714 : I've been known to dabble in magic and play the bagpipe. I'm a geology major from Maine. If I sound like someone you'd be able to tolerate, and/or you'd like to get to know me better, let's talk!
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Dan714's favorite FMLs
by inked / 02/05/2012 at 12:54am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/02/2012 at 11:23pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML
by aliezzedine / 02/02/2012 at 6:32am / Lebanon / Miscellaneous
Today, I was breaking into a house when three police cruisers pulled up. They ran my social, my license plates, and asked me twenty minutes worth of questions, before allowing me to go back to work. I work as a locksmith; the homeowner had lost their keys. FML
by ABBenzin / 02/01/2012 at 11:11am / United States / Work
by Anonymous / 10/31/2011 at 6:09am / United Kingdom (Peterborough) / Miscellaneous
by jdmarine83 / 10/07/2011 at 3:32pm / United States / Work
by anonymous / 09/13/2011 at 8:07pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy
by skichick54 / 08/24/2011 at 1:28am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by fuckall / 01/19/2011 at 6:05am / United States (Oregon) / Money
by Anonymous / 12/24/2010 at 10:12am / United States / Money
Today, I wanted to punish a student for being late. I decided to start a pop quiz before he arrived. I was positive there wasn't enough time for him to finish. He scored full marks and I couldn't say a word. FML
by K_M / 08/23/2010 at 12:18am / Malaysia (Selangor) / Kids
Today, I jokingly asked my husband if he was going to make it to our first child's Christening as there was a football match on at the same time. Without hesitating, he replyed that he would just watch the recording. He meant the recording of the Christening. He was serious. FML
by Anonymous / 02/28/2010 at 9:26am / South Africa (Eastern Cape) / Kids
Today, I had an interview for a college. The college is in Rhode Island. I live on the West coast. When I asked the interviewer if they got to the mainland by boat or by some other form of transportation, he told me Rhode Island is not an island. FML
by Anonymous / 02/16/2010 at 12:15am / United States (California) / Transportation
Today, I was telling my entire cocktail party about the time I accidentally flashed my volleyball team at a pool party. While trying to demonstrate how it happened, I accidentally pulled my dress down and flashed everyone again. FML
by Anonymous / 12/23/2009 at 3:48pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
Today, I walked into my room in only a towel. I walked in front of my brother to get to my computer. He said, "My webcam is on." I replied smartly by screaming, hugging the towel tightly to me, turning, and running straight into the glass door, dropping the towel. His friends saw and laughed. FML
by GlassPwn / 12/19/2009 at 12:01am / United States / Miscellaneous