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Damned_Architect

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Damned_Architect
  • Town/Country : New York, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 267
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Damned_Architect : I'm a native New Yorker and an Architect who works on repairing skyscrapers. When not riding a suspended scaffold up a decaying facade, falling through a poorly installed pipe scaffold on a roof (I recently returned from being on disability because of that), or slaving away on reports at the office, I like to enjoy life in the city, travel the world, and meet new people.

People who know me say that:

• I'm very tall and too chubby for my own good.
• Am thoughtful, generous, and forgetful.
• Know way too much stuff about everything!

To be continued....

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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Damned_Architect's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband yelled from upstairs, "Babe! BABE, COME QUICK!" Terrified that something might have happened to our newborn daughter, I rushed up, only to find out he just wanted to show me that he'd learned how to spin a top on the tip of his penis without it falling. FML

#20908628
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43578) - you deserved it (5177)

On 10/05/2013 at 5:28pm - intimacy - by -____- (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I asked my surgeon if I would be having a general or local anesthetic at my upcoming operation. He replied, "General, of course! It's gonna be a slaughterhouse in there!" FML

#20824490
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38737) - you deserved it (3430) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/06/2013 at 5:59pm - health - by pong - France (Midi-Pyrenees)

Today, after giving me my very first orgasm, my boyfriend sat me down and had a serious chat with me about my orgasm face. Apparently it reminded him of the scene in the Exorcist with the possessed girl, and it really freaked him out. FML

#20816805
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52767) - you deserved it (5800)

On 08/02/2013 at 10:08am - intimacy - by right (woman) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, I met the most beautiful girl I've ever seen on the beach. I was nervous, but I just smiled and said, "Hey, you're really pretty." Then I let out a horrific fart. FML

#20816798
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47108) - you deserved it (9789)

On 08/02/2013 at 9:58am - misc - by YouSoSmelly (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my 10-year-old son told my 5-year-old daughter that we're a ghost family, and told her to run through our glass door to see for herself. She believed it, ran straight into the door, and ended up having to be taken to hospital. FML

#20813979
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52607) - you deserved it (5051)

On 07/31/2013 at 7:19pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Falkirk)

Today, my dad walked in on me filming a Harlem Shake video. He stared for a moment, said "Son, I don't have a problem with homosexuals, but... nevermind." then shook his head and walked out. FML

#20806774
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35591) - you deserved it (22580)

On 07/27/2013 at 6:43pm - misc - by ¬_¬ (man) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I received some unwanted anal sex tips. They were unwanted because I'm not into anal sex, and the tips came from my drunk mom. FML

#20806687
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46650) - you deserved it (2987)

On 07/27/2013 at 5:41pm - intimacy - by moms know best??? (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was getting freaky with my boyfriend and told him to spank me. In a seductive voice, he told me not to tell him what to do. Continuing, I asked him how he was going to punish me, to which he then replied, "I'm going to punch you straight in the face." FML

#20798640
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53276) - you deserved it (11249)

On 07/23/2013 at 12:04am - intimacy - by suckstosuck (woman) - United States (California)

Today, the guy whose son I babysat for six hours straight confessed to being broke, then actually asked if he could pay me with sex instead. FML

#20797604
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49126) - you deserved it (3717)

On 07/22/2013 at 1:47pm - work - by nowimbroketoo (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I announced my third pregnancy to my family. My dad's only reaction was to scoff, "Really? Stop breeding already." FML

#20780277
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40277) - you deserved it (13006)

On 07/13/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked in on my daughter hugging and sobbing into her Edward Cullen cut-out. She won't tell me what's wrong, yet she can confide in a creepy fictional stalker whose facial expression is locked to "chronically constipated". Where did I go wrong? FML

#20778274
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45810) - you deserved it (6711)

On 07/12/2013 at 7:18pm - kids - by So little trust. (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I once again told my son he needed a job and a girlfriend because I simply could not keep him in my house anymore. He yelled, "No, I can do whatever I want!" Then went back to playing video games. He's 38. FML

#15960842
365 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27410) - you deserved it (39621)

On 04/28/2011 at 7:07am - kids - by oldmama728 -



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