Dallasluver19

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Offline (the 10/06/2014 at 9:37pm)

Dallasluver19

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3179
  • Number of comments : 199
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

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Dallasluver19's page activity

Visits<b>panromantic</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 10:55pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 5:58pm<b>britbear0731</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 9:21pm<b>chisty87</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 10:37am<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 5:16pm<b>hazerdagreek</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 10:44pm<b>zanoty</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 11:15pm<b>katydid91</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 2:43am<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 2:44pm<b>kashicookie</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 11:31am<b>milldoglol</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 4:39pm<b>justaguynl</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 12:50pm<b>WizardlyUnicorn</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 6:46pm<b>JLFML</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 12:28am<b>reginag_13</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 5:37am<b>tek523</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 1:04am<b>dinodeanna</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 8:23pm<b>SamanthaCharlee</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 4:15pm

Fucked!<b>tranced_</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 11:58pm

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Dallasluver19's favorite FMLs

Today, my mother-in-law said I wasn't the type she expected her son to marry, as he's always dated cheerleaders and model types. I must have looked offended, so she added, "I mean they weren't smart like you." So, I might be smart but I'm the ugliest girl my husband has ever been with. FML

by Anonymous / 07/02/2012 at 1:47am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend doesn't have time to text me back, but he does have time to post an entire Facebook album dedicated to cats. FML

by JJBones / 06/29/2012 at 6:03am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, a homeless man tried to sell me a "magic, one-finger glove". It was a used condom. FML

by Anonymous / 06/24/2012 at 10:17am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, while shopping, I bumped into a guy I knew in high school. He went on about he heard I'd got married, looked like I'd had a baby, and that, "she looks just like you!" The kid was my niece, and my husband broke up with me 2 years ago. Thanks for bringing that up. FML

by thankspal / 06/24/2012 at 6:57am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I stepped out for some fresh air while I waited for my clothes to dry at the laundromat. Just as I was retrieving my clothes, a disheveled-looking kid staggered over, pushed me aside, and started vomiting his guts out all over my fresh clothes. FML

by herpmonster / 06/23/2012 at 12:59pm / Italy / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my girlfriend I love her for the first time. She said, "Thanks." FML

by Anonymous / 06/23/2012 at 10:23am / Canada / Love

Today, I divorced my husband of 20 years. The only positive thing about my day was my pregnancy test. Yes, it was his. FML

by GM38 / 06/22/2012 at 10:57pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, after a very painful mouth surgery, I went home to take a nap. Then my nose started bleeding, so I stuck a tissue in it and fell asleep. When I woke up, I was so high from painkillers that when I saw the tissue, I thought it was a ghost. I screamed so loud I burst a stitch. FML

by LaurenB / 06/07/2012 at 2:12pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Health

Today, I had my first ever shift at the zoo. My job is to explain the characteristics and habits of various animals to the visitors. A five-year-old outsmarted me while I was talking about lions. FML

by DuhSteven / 06/06/2012 at 1:04pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Animals

Today, my father-in-law called me an idiot for buying him coffee cake because he can't have caffeine. He refuses to believe that there's as much coffee in coffee cake as there is ham in a hamburger. FML

by 635CSi / 06/06/2012 at 1:23am / United States (California) / Health

Today, my uncle gave me a lecture on how I eat too much "unhealthy" junk food, and that it can be very harmful for me. All the while smoking a cigarette. FML

by Singapore / 06/05/2012 at 10:59pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, it was the last day of school, and I said goodbye to one of my students. She then told me how to correctly pronounce her name. I'd said it wrong all year. FML

by Mark / 06/05/2012 at 10:21pm / United States / Work

Today, I was at work, reading some funny stories on my phone. Just as one of my co-workers decided to share that his father had passed away recently, I burst into uncontrollable, teary-eyed laughter at a story. They don't believe my explanation, and have branded me the office asshole. FML

by Anonymous / 06/05/2012 at 2:47pm / Brazil (Sao Paulo) / Work

Today, my husband went nuts. He's quit his job and set out building an amateur bomb shelter in our backyard. According to him, there's "substantial evidence" that cannibalism is on the rise across the country, and that "it's gonna be like Resident Evil out there, babe." FML

by why... / 06/05/2012 at 1:21pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I was walking home with my boyfriend. There's a short cut to my house by jumping a fence but he insisted that we take the long way because, "Girls don't jump fences." To prove him wrong, I jumped the fence. I fell and broke my leg. FML

by Josie / 06/05/2012 at 12:27am / United States (Kentucky) / Love