About DalPozzo13 : Ive never been good at these things so I dont really know what to say
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Today, I'm sitting in the ER with my eight-year-old son. He broke his arm after jumping out through the second story window. He was too impatient to walk to the ice cream van pulling up outside. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20191) - you deserved it (2383)
On 07/13/2012 at 1:08pm - kids - by Marjorie (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I went to an orchestra concert. Halfway through the performance I had to fart really bad, so I decided to try and sneak it in while the orchestra was playing a loud exciting part. Just as I let it rip, there was a dramatic pause in the music. Everyone heard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10570) - you deserved it (20876)
On 07/10/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Concert Flatulent - United States (Texas)
Today, I was listening to some Michael Jackson through my earphones when I saw this really cute girl. Trying to impress, I aproached her while doing some dance moves, not thinking about how unbelievably stupid it must have looked without the music. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5370) - you deserved it (21328)
On 07/09/2012 at 6:37am - misc - by Anonymous - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)
Today, I had a violent sneezing attack while changing my phone's password and now I have no idea what it could be. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21199) - you deserved it (2817)
On 07/08/2012 at 9:29pm - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend and sister fooling around in the shower together. Supposedly, she was sleepwalking, and he was trying to wake her up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33474) - you deserved it (1934)
On 07/04/2012 at 12:40pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Prince Edward Island)
Today, I was walking past a homeless guy while smoking; he asked if he could have a cigarette. So I gave him one and said without thinking, "Sorry, it’s a menthol, but beggars can't be choosers." FML
I agree, your life sucks (6663) - you deserved it (19150)
Today, I saw my best friend, who's a cop. He was dressed up in regular clothes and with six other guys. I said, "Officer T.? Didn't you have work today?" Turns out he was undercover, and I blew his investigation. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15076) - you deserved it (36596)
On 07/01/2012 at 4:45am - misc - by immabitch - United States
Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. In an ambulance. On the way to the hospital after being T-boned at an intersection. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28969) - you deserved it (1139)
Today, I went to the bookstore and saw a stunning girl reading. I walked over and picked up a book, thinking our two books were the same category, hence a good conversation starter. She looked at me, and I pointed at my book and smiled. After that, she left. It was a sex position book. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5615) - you deserved it (22268)
On 06/27/2012 at 12:39am - misc - by deli Shoppe - United States (California)
Today, I was having a debate with my friend over tattoos. I used the example that you wouldn't put a bumper sticker on a Ferrari. He looked me in the eye and said, "Yeah, but you're no Ferrari. More like a Prius." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8356) - you deserved it (18989)
On 06/17/2012 at 1:01pm - misc - by kitty shah - United States
Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9179) - you deserved it (17160)
Today, I was out to coffee with an extremely attractive friend. A crazy man came up to the window we were facing. He took one look at her, then turned to me with a big, congratulatory smile, flashing me a thumbs-up. Then he turned to her, frowned disappointedly and gave a thumbs-down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16764) - you deserved it (1327)
On 06/14/2012 at 4:11am - misc - by offended (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my date made me pay him for picking me up, and taking me back home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20634) - you deserved it (2761)
On 06/13/2012 at 12:42am - money - by bad date - United States (Nebraska)
Today, my identical twin sister's boyfriend walked over to me, and whispered in my ear, "I know what you look like naked." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34187) - you deserved it (2878)
On 06/12/2012 at 2:28pm - misc - by creeped out - United States (New York)
Today, I was texting my girlfriend and asked her for a picture, expecting something provocative. She sent me a picture of her holding a positive pregnancy test. We had sex once. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11965) - you deserved it (28976)
On 06/09/2012 at 12:51am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Mississippi)
Monday 17 June 2013
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