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DalPozzo13

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DalPozzo13
  • Town/Country : Knoxville, US
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 29 August 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 3618
  • Number of comments : 79
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About DalPozzo13 : Ive never been good at these things so I dont really know what to say

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DalPozzo13's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at a local restaurant. The girl that I like walked by so I tried to give her a high five. My hand ended up on her boob instead. FML

#17315366
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23752) - you deserved it (15277)

On 07/31/2011 at 12:20am - misc - by James (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I sneezed so violently that my tampon came out. FML

#17227905
363 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57000) - you deserved it (6812)

On 07/23/2011 at 9:06am - intimacy - by Sarah - United States

Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML

#17206347
355 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35887) - you deserved it (7775)

On 07/21/2011 at 5:24pm - love - by toni405 - United States

Today, I caught a cab to take me to a hospital appointment. The driver turned around and told me I was in the Cash Cab. I got really excited and screamed. That is, until she laughed and said, "Just kidding. I always wanted to do that to someone." FML

#17128085
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33180) - you deserved it (8187)

On 07/15/2011 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went into hospital for knee surgery. When I awoke, I was surprised to find a bandage wrapped around my throbbing head. The nurse explained that a student observer had fainted in the operating room and his head had smashed against mine on the way down. FML

#17027356
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37000) - you deserved it (2184) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/08/2011 at 11:46am - health - by Anonymous - Belgium (Liege)

Today, I stepped in a turd. Not a dog turd, my grandmother's turd. FML

#16900217
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39032) - you deserved it (3285)

On 06/28/2011 at 4:40pm - animals - by Username - United States (Texas)

Today, in science, we were studying reproduction. Our teacher was reading out the notes and claimed that 'the female's penis stiffens to enter the male's vagina.' I'm supposed to be learning stuff from this woman. FML

#16892674
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35162) - you deserved it (2785)

On 06/28/2011 at 2:39am - intimacy - by girlshavepenises (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I had to pick my parents up from jail. They thought it would be okay to have sex behind a bush. FML

#16761961
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44347) - you deserved it (3683)

On 06/20/2011 at 11:57am - intimacy - by Username - United States (Texas)

Today, while a very cute girl was explaining the apartment's laundry machines to me, I blurted out, "It's okay, my pants are used to handling huge loads". FML

#16758524
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13875) - you deserved it (33916)

On 06/20/2011 at 3:37am - misc - by NewTenant (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, our new cat, which my mum was hesitant about letting us keep because she believes they're diseased, gave us all ringworm. FML

#16694485
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24444) - you deserved it (11443)

On 06/16/2011 at 12:14pm - health - by catlover - China

Today, I snuck up on my girlfriend to give her a kiss. Only after I planted a big one did I realize it was not my girlfriend, or even a girl for that matter. FML

#16596385
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19614) - you deserved it (45551)

On 06/10/2011 at 3:06pm - love - by gabxoxo03 - United States (New York)

Today, I was given a new nickname at work due to my boss always confusing me with one of my co-workers who is taller than me. Someone suggested he just call us the same name to make it simpler, and the tall one would be big and the short one little. Everyone at my job now calls me Little Dick. FML

#16591385
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36806) - you deserved it (4096)

On 06/10/2011 at 4:09am - work - by lilben (man) - United States (California)

Today, my fiancé nervously sat me down for a "serious chat". The chat wound up with him asking if we could postpone our wedding, because his World of Warcraft guild had a raid scheduled for the same day. FML

#16487727
374 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44630) - you deserved it (7882)

On 06/03/2011 at 7:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my dad came round to the house. Looking rather pleased with himself he pulled out his phone, grinned, and chucked it over to me. I glanced at the screen to see a naked woman. He smiled and said "I tapped that last night". FML

#16480333
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39825) - you deserved it (4311)

On 06/03/2011 at 6:17am - intimacy - by peaaaak (woman) - United Kingdom (Thurrock)

Today, we finally got wireless Internet. My mom won't let us open any doors or windows in fear that it might "let the Internet out". It's 103 degrees in here. FML

#16464662
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52830) - you deserved it (4073)

On 06/02/2011 at 5:45am - health - by meyo555 - United States (Nebraska)



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