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DalPozzo13

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DalPozzo13
  • Town/Country : Knoxville, US
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 29 August 1990 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 2190
  • Number of comments : 78
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About DalPozzo13 : Ive never been good at these things so I dont really know what to say

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DalPozzo13's favorite FMLs

Today, after weeks of wondering if my cat has a fetish for licking my bed covers, I finally witnessed him licking up an ant off of the covers. Turns out that my bed is infested with ants. FML

#20138030
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16374) - you deserved it (3869)

On 10/29/2012 at 12:23am - animals - by lifelike (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML

#20128322
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22233) - you deserved it (3160)

On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I decided to show my friends the picture I drew, picturing the four of us in a zombie apocalypse setting. Turns out they never saw me as their friend and I'm creeping them out. FML

#20128150
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17927) - you deserved it (5442)

On 10/22/2012 at 11:39am - misc - by Nana (woman) - Sweden (Vasterbottens Lan)

Today, at work as a massage therapist, I pulled down the guy's blanket slightly to massage his lower back. There were shit stains spreading from his ass crack all the way to his mid-back. When I told him, he wanted me to massage there anyway. FML

#20127667
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21899) - you deserved it (968)

On 10/22/2012 at 12:07am - work - by Lunazel93 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mother told me that my dead grandmother speaks to her. How? When she's thinking of her while brushing her teeth, her electric toothbrush will suddenly stop buzzing and this tells her her mother is communicating with her. FML

#20127529
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11420) - you deserved it (825)

On 10/21/2012 at 10:52pm - misc - by smdh - United States

Today, at a family reunion, we all squeezed in for a picture. I set the self-timer and ran to get in it. 2 seconds before the picture went off, some guy came up, stole the camera, and ran away. FML

#20118194
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18257) - you deserved it (1348)

On 10/15/2012 at 3:57pm - money - by Pissed (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I walked in on my brother sticking his erect penis through a donut. I doubt I'll ever be able to unsee this. FML

#20113997
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24666) - you deserved it (1743)

On 10/12/2012 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out on his deck out back. When leaving, I heard the sliding glass door open on the upper deck, I froze in the yard to not be seen. Too bad I didn't move. Apparently his dad pees off the deck at night. I had to walk home covered in pee. FML

#20113299
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18234) - you deserved it (5155)

On 10/12/2012 at 7:11am - health - by monkeyzz (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my new roommate showed me to my room, which I got a good deal on. I noticed a big black spot on the floor in the walk-in closet. When I asked, he said his last roommate committed suicide and he didn't want to pay to have the carpets professionally cleaned, hence the "good deal." FML

#20113152
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20514) - you deserved it (1225)

On 10/12/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by Dino (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I learned that scorpions can apparently hold their breath for hours, and that doing so makes them angry. I found this out when I removed a scorpion from the bottom of my pool and found that it was not entirely drowned. FML

#20112873
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16686) - you deserved it (1362)

On 10/11/2012 at 10:56pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant. The father is my 15-year-old son. FML

#20111886
528 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62421) - you deserved it (6324)

On 10/11/2012 at 10:30am - kids - by wdunn69733 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was placed firmly in the friend-zone. By my wife. We've been married 10 years. She doesn't want a divorce, she says it'd be too "time-consuming." FML

#20111577
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21737) - you deserved it (1364)

On 10/11/2012 at 1:56am - love - by agh marriage (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was walking home when I saw an elderly woman struggling with a large bag of garbage. I asked if I could help. I got it all the way to the dumpster and the bag ripped. Inside were about fourteen dead cats. FML

Today, I found out why my cat hasn't been coming home for regular meals. Apparently, my elderly next door neighbour has forgotten that her cat is dead and puts food out for it every morning. My cat is exploiting her by impersonating her dead cat to get better food. My cat is an asshole. FML

#20110144
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20683) - you deserved it (3456)

On 10/10/2012 at 4:43am - animals - by assholecat (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found out that my daughter's "pen pal" is really a 58-year-old man in prison. FML

#20109821
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18113) - you deserved it (1819)

On 10/09/2012 at 10:59pm - kids - by ohgod. - United States (Florida)



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