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Dakota27

Offline (the 12/15/2014 at 3:00pm) | Search for a member

Dakota27

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 22 July 1987 (27 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2009
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Dakota27's page activity

Visits<b>sig4life</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 11:14pm<b>aishaa1</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 2:30am<b>rockstate_drew</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 9:41am

Dakota27's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of Dakota27's badges

Dakota27's favorite FMLs

Today, I decided to make home made french fries. I figured all I needed was potatoes and salt, right? Wrong! I also needed the fire department and an ambulance. FML

#17934685
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17165) - you deserved it (24850)

On 10/08/2011 at 11:36am - misc - by anonymous - Sri Lanka

Today, my mom instructed me to never scream when being attacked by a rapist. Apparently it would only anger him, causing him to chop my boobs off and superglue my eyes shut. FML

#17853519
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35964) - you deserved it (2898)

On 09/28/2011 at 2:47am - intimacy - by Sabraynay -

Today, I thought it would be funny to put a few extra spoonfuls of sugar in my co-worker's coffee. He thought it would be funny to throw the boiling hot coffee over my crotch. FML

#17794413
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11912) - you deserved it (34049)

On 09/21/2011 at 8:40am - work - by unknown - Philippines

Today, while playing with a lighter, I jokingly told my boyfriend I would burn his mustache off. He responded by telling me he would burn off mine. FML

#17781306
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13194) - you deserved it (32174)

On 09/19/2011 at 4:27pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I will be sleeping in my aunt and uncle's living room. It is 90 degrees. There is an air conditioner but if you turn it on, the raccoons living in the wall will get pissed off and try to claw through the wall. Only five more nights sweating my balls off or imagining racoons having angry sex. FML

Today, my girlfriend told me that if my penis was on any other body it would be considered small, but on me it's "cute." FML

#17744252
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37087) - you deserved it (3935)

On 09/14/2011 at 2:11pm - intimacy - by wf - United States

Today, my boyfriend proposed by painting his chest with "marry me?" and an arrow going down. The ring was attached to his penis with a string. FML

#17743940
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41570) - you deserved it (6223)

On 09/14/2011 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by ohmaigawd (woman) - Argentina

Today, for the 5th day in a row, I had to keep my 7-year-old home from school and search his poop because he "forgot" he's not supposed to swallow things like, in this case, a screw that fell off his scooter. FML

#17735426
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22874) - you deserved it (3614)

On 09/13/2011 at 9:43am - misc - by OopsMonkey - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, my husband dropped his pants and said, "Why don't you go down and say hello." This is his idea of foreplay. FML

#17734808
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28869) - you deserved it (4840)

On 09/13/2011 at 6:11am - intimacy - by notinterested (woman) - United States

Today, I apologized to the cat for walking into the laundry room while he was using the litter box. FML

#17734128
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23588) - you deserved it (9433)

On 09/13/2011 at 2:05am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

#17727595
395 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85475) - you deserved it (13102)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, the girl I've been dating, and starting to fall in love with, walked out of the bathroom claiming we were going to be parents. I jumped off of the couch in disbelief, yelling, "Really?" She replied, "Really. I just gave birth to a huge dump baby." FML

#17718767
349 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39356) - you deserved it (7097)

On 09/11/2011 at 11:13am - misc - by CaseyFpC85 - United States (Florida)

Today, I found thousands of ants in a secret nest in an unused corner of my apartment. They were feeding on the baking mix I forgot in a box from moving two months ago, and the queen has been laying her eggs on my wireless router. FML

#17710683
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23845) - you deserved it (14328)

On 09/10/2011 at 11:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML

#17706108
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35063) - you deserved it (6144) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/09/2011 at 7:18pm - love - by Angie - France

Today, I was working alone in the office with my brother. He's run out of work to do, so has been singing Disney songs loudly and badly, throwing stationery at me, and just now snuck up on me from behind and wrapped duct tape round my face. It's just us in the office next week. FML

#17696149
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21603) - you deserved it (2469)

On 09/08/2011 at 11:41am - work - by whyarewerelated (woman) - United Kingdom (London)



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