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Dajucy1

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Dajucy1
  • Town/Country : West Jordan, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 13 June 1996 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 839
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Dajucy1 : If you're stalking me, I want you to know you'll get an immediate erection right about...now

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Today, I was in my 15-year-old sister’s room when I found birth control pills. I told my parents, who responded by saying, "Sex is beautiful thing." When I was her age my parents caught me pleasuring myself, and smashed my laptop with a hammer, all while calling me "filthy" and "immoral". FML

#5375758
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46466) - you deserved it (7006)

On 09/20/2009 at 4:55pm - misc - by LovesHisHand (man) - United States (California)

Today, I ignored my cat's incessant meowing, and pushed him away every time he wanted to be petted. The next time I walked downstairs I found him dead. FML

#5210731
383 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24228) - you deserved it (84148)

On 09/12/2009 at 5:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I ignored my cat's incessant meowing, and pushed him away every time he wanted to be petted. The next time I walked downstairs I found him dead. FML

#5210731
383 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24228) - you deserved it (84148)

On 09/12/2009 at 5:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, after spending 20 minutes every day working on my abs for the last month and feeling pretty good about how they were looking, I received the first comment about them. A girl poked them and said 'squish'. FML

Today, I realized that the shorts I have been wearing all day say "Juicy" on the ass. My name is John. FML

#5136850
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10350) - you deserved it (44097)

On 09/08/2009 at 9:33pm - misc - by JuicyJohn (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I received a text message from my favorite sister saying "Great news! The technology in condoms has improved so much that they ensure that accidents like you won't ever happen again!" Today's my birthday. FML

#4978107
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37352) - you deserved it (6595)

On 09/01/2009 at 3:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I decided to ride my rusty old bike to work, since it will help the environment. I was standing up and had a tight grip on the handle bars. The handle bars came off and I fell down on the cross bar, busting my nuts. FML

#4967329
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32882) - you deserved it (7243)

On 09/01/2009 at 12:03am - health - by David (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was at the mall and someone peeked their head under the door of my dressing room while I was half dressed. Not knowing who it was, I kicked him in the face just out of instinct. Its was a 4 year old kid looking for his mother. FML

#4137553
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49262) - you deserved it (20343)

On 07/29/2009 at 4:26pm - misc - by 4yrldkicker (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my family invited a bunch of their friends over for a party. At some point they decided to play some home videos from many years ago. In one of them, I was 7, I said, "Look Mommy! I can make my pee-pee bigger by doing this!" Everyone saw and laughed. FML

#4027991
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40973) - you deserved it (3686)

On 07/25/2009 at 10:55am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was telling my dad about plans to go out late for a few drinks next week. My dad started his usual "YOU COULD GET RAPED!" lecture, before my brother sprang to my defence, "It's not like she's what they're after, is she?" Apparently, rapists are out of my league. FML

#3880719
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39361) - you deserved it (4045)

On 07/19/2009 at 1:11pm - misc - by adalia (woman) - United Kingdom (Barnsley)

Today, I finally got into a yoga class with the instructor I've been crushing on for 2 years. As he walked closer to greet me, I lifted my leg over my head into a full split, and queefed obnoxiously loud. He responded with his gag reflex. FML

#3241027
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41982) - you deserved it (25190)

On 06/26/2009 at 12:51pm - misc - by LondonKitsch (woman) - United States

Today, I was having sex with a girl. Things were getting pretty hot, so I decided to smack her butt. I missed. I smacked my balls instead. Real hard. FML

#3055426
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11777) - you deserved it (83791)

On 06/20/2009 at 7:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Switzerland (Bern)

Today, I reached into my fridge to grab a strawberry soda. I noticed the can had started to leak from the top so I slurped up the spilt red liquid on the top of the can. I realized it wasn't soda, but blood from a defrosting steak on the shelf above it. FML

#2929872
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47277) - you deserved it (20155)

On 06/16/2009 at 12:38am - misc - by kjmsit (woman) - United States (North Carolina)



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