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DJ_Pixel's favorite FMLs
Today, my mother kept nagging at me because my 9-month-old daughter only calms down when I play her metal. She demands I use gospel, otherwise she will turn into a "devil-worshipping lunatic like her mother". FML
by SlapAndTickle / 10/10/2013 at 11:04pm / United States / Kids
by Anonymous / 10/03/2013 at 5:40pm / Canada (Ontario) / Money
by Anonymous / 10/02/2013 at 8:17am / United States (Michigan) / Love
Today, my ex-wife put my number on Craigslist as a gay fashion designer needing a one night stand. I only found out when I got a text from an unknown number asking me when was the last time I "ate a black anaconda". FML
by Craigslist is Evil. / 09/24/2013 at 2:12pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy
by friend loves a gay guy... / 09/23/2013 at 4:49pm / United States (Ohio) / Love
Today, I was complimented by a stranger, who said I looked great in my outfit. I thanked her, and she immediately gave me a fist-bump. I stared curiously, and she explained: she was arguing with her friends about whether I'm a man or a woman. The pitch of my voice was the answer. FML
by Anonymous / 09/15/2013 at 3:53am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by sleeplessinrichmond / 09/15/2013 at 2:02am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Volunteer / 09/13/2013 at 6:24pm / United States (Indiana) / Work
Today, I was standing in line at the grocery store waiting for my husband. After a while, I feel him kissing my neck, so I turn to tell him that it's not appropriate in public. It wasn't my husband. FML
by whyme / 09/12/2013 at 10:44am / United States (Florida) / Love
by spiritbeast33 / 09/11/2013 at 2:17am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Python22 / 09/04/2013 at 8:52pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by resurrected / 09/04/2013 at 11:59am / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Work
Today, I, for some reason, was talking to my mom about money. I jokingly said that the reason we're short on cash is because of her internet porn addiction. She replied, with a straight face, "How did you know?" I'm still not sure if she's joking or not. FML
by Anonymous / 09/01/2013 at 1:06am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by fartz / 08/31/2013 at 2:04am / United States / Miscellaneous
by scammed / 08/29/2013 at 2:48pm / United States (Arizona) / Health
- Today, I met the man of my dreams. Hot, funny, smart, sensitive, he guesses at what I need before I… Today, I had to work a double shift as a server with a multi-fractured foot because my boss decided… Today, my live in boyfriend has been giving me the silent treatment for the last three days because…