DEVASTATOR

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DEVASTATOR

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  • Town/Country : London, United Kingdom
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 3 February 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6581
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About DEVASTATOR : I`m just a normal person like you guys :)

DEVASTATOR's page activity

Visits<b>vampyrate3562</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 8:10pm<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 5:18pm<b>HashtagCarly</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 8:41pm<b>artistickitten</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 2:14pm<b>0dd80d</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 10:14am<b>NightmareDawg27</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 3:29am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 1:29pm<b>iRydePwnies</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 12:20am<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 1:10am<b>k00li0</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 2:04am<b>amberock16</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 11:38am<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 3:58am<b>eVulsheep</b> - the 10/26/2009 at 3:55pm<b>lostguy</b> - the 08/22/2009 at 11:09pm<b>mari0958</b> - the 08/19/2009 at 4:56am<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 08/12/2009 at 7:47am<b>Horde</b> - the 08/12/2009 at 7:05am<b>ch2358</b> - the 08/09/2009 at 2:35pm

DEVASTATOR's FML badges

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DEVASTATOR's favorite FMLs

Today, my drill sergeant was yelling at me and asking me questions. I got a question wrong, and he asked me if I am a "Shit Sandwich". I replied "Yes sir, with extra cheese." I'm running miles till the day I die. FML

by BarhydtBran / 08/17/2015 at 9:55pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, my girlfriend dyed her hair from blonde to brunette. An hour later, she found one of her blonde hairs on my pillow, and accused me of cheating. FML

by Anonymous / 08/17/2015 at 6:46pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I realized how cheap I am when I blacked out at a water park and some one yelled "Call 911!" I tried to mutter out "No, that's too expensive!" FML

by extremereviews / 08/16/2015 at 6:14pm / United States (Texas) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend told me she wants to have sex with my ass. I'm not sure she's taking "no" for an answer, seeing as how she's keeping a dildo on her nightstand and is clearly waiting for me to fall asleep. FML

by Anonymous / 08/16/2015 at 11:49am / Intimacy

Today, while working at a children's toy store, a woman walked in, looked around a bit, then asked if we sell dildos. FML

by Anonymous / 08/16/2015 at 11:22am / United States / Work

Today, during a blowjob, my girlfriend decided to try something new by squeezing my balls as hard as she could as I came, for a "more intense orgasm". All she gave me was a ruptured testicle. FML

by Anonymous / 07/27/2015 at 8:08pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I burned my hand while making breakfast. As I staggered around the kitchen in agony, looking for some burn cream, my cat figured he'd latch onto said hand and drag his claws through the burn. FML

Today, I finally brought a girl home from college. While I was making her some coffee, my roommate came down in her underwear, pretended to be my girlfriend, and asked if we were having a threesome. My date left before I could explain, and my roommate thinks it's fucking hilarious. FML

by GimmeLaCoffee / 05/15/2014 at 9:03am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I walked in on my sister masturbating with my curling iron. FML

by need € for new iron / 05/16/2013 at 3:49pm / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Intimacy

Today, it's been 13 months since I've been living in the States. I've been called a Nazi, asked if we have electricity in Germany, and been made fun of the way I speak with my "German accent", the list goes on. I'm not even German, I'm Danish. FML

by LearnGeographyUSA / 12/12/2012 at 1:45am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, my family went to the Christmas tree farm, and cut down the perfect tree. When we got home we put the kids down for a nap and took some time to relax. We went out to the truck to bring the tree into the house, it was gone. Someone stole my Christmas tree from my driveway in broad daylight. FML

by Project-Mayhem / 12/02/2009 at 5:57am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my husband thinks its okay to have an online girlfriend and have naked pictures sent to his email because he's not "physically touching, making love, or kissing". The sad part is that the online girlfriend gets more action than me. FML

by j.b. / 12/02/2009 at 12:57am / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, me and my girlfriend were riding on my motorcycle. While at a stop light, she started to make these weird noises. Turns out she was having an orgasm. I still can't give her one. FML

by Anonymous / 11/30/2009 at 3:35pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I took my girlfriend's 4-year-old son and four of his friends to the amusement park. While walking down a hill, I slipped on some water and slid down the hill, taking out multiple children. It wasn't rain. I'd slid on vomit. FML

by Anonymous / 11/30/2009 at 12:22pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, a funny smelling liquid was sprayed all over the computer. Last week, I told my fully pottytrained but extremely reluctant toddler that he couldn't play Barney games until he used the big boy toilet. A 4 year old's revenge really sucks. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2009 at 4:10pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous