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  • Number of visits : 796
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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Curtis66's page activity

Visits<b>donaldduckdumb</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 4:13am<b>itsjulia16</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 5:27pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 6:46am<b>maritaak</b> - the 09/09/2015 at 9:36am<b>CommentKing207</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 3:07pm<b>NandersTheFox</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 7:02pm<b>ithappens93</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 10:32am<b>Keshy</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 8:25am<b>Participation</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 12:21am<b>pey</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 6:00pm<b>Gwen4var</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 2:23pm<b>daniellenicole76</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 12:56am<b>kittina</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 4:32pm<b>Katiekhalifa</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 4:05am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 12:17pm<b>spizzymcgee</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 6:12pm<b>frankvbreukelen</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 3:35am<b>lizzy_r_b_94</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 1:20pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 11:25pm

Curtis66's FML badges

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Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

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Curtis66's favorite FMLs

Today, I let my 9-year-old daughter use my tablet while I made her dinner. A few minutes later, she let out a blood-curdling scream. Turned out she'd searched for My Little Pony pictures and stumbled upon a drawing of Rainbow Dash giving another pony a blowjob. FML

by Anonymous / 09/02/2015 at 11:26am / Canada (Manitoba) / Kids

Today, I was on a boat and I thought I saw a towel fly off, but it was actually my fricken dog. FML

by justin Bieber / 06/15/2015 at 10:49am / United States (Michigan) / Transportation

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend for the first time. I moved my leg to wrap it around him and accidentally hit his penis. Without thinking, I said, "Sorry little guy!" FML

by MiniJeans / 04/29/2015 at 10:25pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I got a new haircut. I was feeling pretty confident, until coworkers and family members kept making comments like, "I think you gained a little weight", "You look older" and "Do you still like guys?" Apparently, my new haircut changed my waist size and my sexual orientation. FML

by Lovemynewhaircut / 03/10/2015 at 2:47pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while having a sneak through my brother's browser, I found a bookmark for a Google Docs file. It was a short story involving him horrifically killing our entire family. It ended with the words: "And that is what happens when people don't respect the author's privacy." FML

by well SHIT / 02/27/2014 at 4:46pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom called to bestow upon me warm holiday pearls of wisdom: "I hope you aren't giving everyone your natural handmade eco-shit again. Gifts should be returnable. And have a price." FML

Today, I finally got a tattoo of an alchemy symbol that I've wanted for years. I also found out later that symbol stands for urine. FML

by PeeLeg / 03/11/2013 at 3:43am / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking a peaceful stroll in the local park when a curious turkey decided to follow me. Trying to shoo it away, I swung my leg at it, as if to fake kick it. Being the stupid animal it is, it decided to fly into my leg as I swung, causing my foot to connect to its neck. It died. FML

by Anonymous / 03/03/2013 at 9:40am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

by Bontempi / 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my teenage daughter to read off directions from my iPhone while I drove. She went on Instagram instead. We missed the turn by 32 miles. FML

by lostforlife / 07/12/2012 at 8:52pm / United States (Maine) / Kids

Today, I was entering a guy's number into my phone, and I couldn't remember his name. Embarrassed, I tried to be sneaky and asked, "Can you spell your name for me, please?" His name is Bob. FML

by Bernadette / 06/28/2012 at 3:58pm / Miscellaneous

Today, my cat woke me up, but not by kneading on me though. Instead, she woke me up by pouncing on the laser pointer my dad was shining on my face. FML

by XxEmoWolfiexX / 05/24/2012 at 5:18pm / United States (Indiana) / Animals

Today, I made a fake Facebook account for a girl, and then set my relationship status to make it look like the fake person was my girlfriend. Someone found out and hacked the fake account. My fake girlfriend just dumped me over Facebook. FML

by Anonymous / 12/18/2011 at 8:24pm / United States (Alabama) / Love

Today, I was in my car with my window down at a red light. Outside, a sweet old lady was sitting on a bench with her dog sleeping next to her. I yelled out the window to tell her how cute her dog was. She replied, "He's dead" and cried. FML

by macattack / 09/01/2011 at 10:29pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Transportation

Today, I went to the mall with my daughter. She asked me if she could go see Santa, so I said yes. She made me sit on his lap with her, and that's when I felt something on my bum. Let's just say Santa had a present for me. FML

by hotmommy / 12/19/2010 at 7:23pm / Intimacy