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Crystal3602

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Crystal3602

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  • Number of visits : 250
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Crystal3602's page activity

Visits<b>olpally</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 12:25am<b>chamay</b> - the 08/15/2013 at 5:52pm

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Crystal3602's favorite FMLs

Today, school was out because of snow. My dad walked in my room and shouted "Why are you home?!" I told him why, and he replied, "Then get out the damn house and play in the snow." He tossed me out in nothing but my shorts. FML

#21037332
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36821) - you deserved it (4633)

On 01/23/2014 at 4:49pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I shut one of my breasts in my car door. FML

#21031414
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49292) - you deserved it (9275)

On 01/18/2014 at 1:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, I'm moving from Arizona to Washington State with my 2 cats in my car. I've only just left and just learned that one cat gets carsick and the other stress farts. Only 956 more miles to go. FML

#20962468
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41996) - you deserved it (5714)

On 11/18/2013 at 6:47pm - animals - by Catcrap! - United States (California)

Today, I got knocked over at the park by a rampant dog. My fiancé stood by laughing his ass off as I repeatedly tried to stand up, only to be knocked back down again. I'm seven months pregnant. FML

#20943386
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66544) - you deserved it (4611)

On 11/03/2013 at 2:21am - love - by StrandedWhale (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, after being forced to take my little sister trick-or-treating, we had the cops called on us twice. She thought it would be funny to tell all the people giving out candy that I'd been following her around and that she had no idea who I was, and that she was scared of me. FML

Today, during dinner, my mom told my dad and me in great detail about the "awesome" new cosmetic surgery idea she just had: constructing earlobes for lobeless ears, using skin taken from women's labia. I was forced to sit through this until I finished my plate. FML

#20941234
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41337) - you deserved it (3682)

On 11/01/2013 at 10:17am - intimacy - by Champignon (woman) - Belgium (Antwerpen)

Today, I got a new cell phone number and sent a text to my wife. Playing around, I said, "Hey sexy are you alone yet? I'm ready to come over." She responded with, "Hey, yeah he is at work - did you get a new number?" FML

#20941049
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85278) - you deserved it (6100)

On 11/01/2013 at 3:01am - intimacy - by PapaW - United States (Utah)

Today, I failed hard at a color test. I thought it was a joke because most of the colors looked the same to me. Now I know why people laugh at my clothes color choices. FML

#20936339
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45019) - you deserved it (3126)

On 10/28/2013 at 12:51am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, during parent/teacher conferences, my mom told my Chemistry teacher that I have an intense crush on him. There are still 7 months left in the school year. FML

#20930913
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46366) - you deserved it (4765)

On 10/23/2013 at 10:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, as I worked as a cashier, two girls came up laughing. I smiled as I rang them up, asking what had made them laugh so hard. One looked me dead in the face and said, "You." They then both walked away, laughing. FML

#20922962
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41581) - you deserved it (3507)

On 10/16/2013 at 5:52pm - work - by amy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I started to come to during dental surgery. I clearly heard someone behind me say "Shit! Get this fucker back under!" then another person mentioning they'd have to kill me to avoid "another lawsuit", followed by laughter and the blackness of sleep. FML

#20909921
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56935) - you deserved it (3356)

On 10/06/2013 at 5:49pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I moved into a new house, I couldn't help but notice a car alarm going off, so I investigated my neighbors. Turns out it's their bird. It imitates chainsaws, car alarms, and much more. FML

#20908147
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42398) - you deserved it (3019)

On 10/05/2013 at 9:51am - animals - by Mike Messenger - United States (Florida)

Today, as I was walking home, a car drove through a puddle and splashed me like in a cheesy movie. As if that wasn't annoying enough, the driver had to pull over because she was laughing too hard. FML

#20907968
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43910) - you deserved it (3100)

On 10/05/2013 at 2:31am - misc - by CelibateHero (man) - United States (Indiana)



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Tuesday 22 July 2014

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