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Croquis

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Croquis
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1741
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About Croquis : I enjoy things in an adjective nature.

Croquis's last visitors

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Croquis's FML badges

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Croquis's badges

Croquis's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to announce to the class that I finally got a girlfriend. I received a standing ovation. FML

#19601611
10 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22384) - you deserved it (3445)

On 05/10/2012 at 7:48am - love - by JG (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he would still love me if I became a vegetable. His response: "Well, the sex wouldn't be any different." FML

#19591291
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14648) - you deserved it (27647)

On 05/08/2012 at 7:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I accidentally kicked a can and it hit a man's shoe. He tried to kick it at me but his foot somehow failed to connect with the can. I could hear it rattling behind me as he failed again and again. So he decided to run up behind me and throw it at my head. FML

#19586621
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17589) - you deserved it (4575)

On 05/07/2012 at 10:08am - misc - by thepigeonsfriend (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I noticed my nephew has blue eyes, freckles and dimples which don't run in my family or my sister's husband's family, but they do run in my husband's family. FML

#19581290
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35004) - you deserved it (3522)

On 05/06/2012 at 9:53am - misc - by Damn (woman) - Australia

Today, on the bus, I caught the eye of this ugly, sweaty girl giving me a death stare through the driver's mirror. I gave her a death stare back. Only then I realized I was staring at myself. FML

#19579357
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9130) - you deserved it (28863)

On 05/05/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by mhm (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked in on my new puppy peeing on the carpet. The trainer had told me to punish her when she's bad by shaking a metal can of pennies at her, since the noise scares dogs. I shook it at her, and she responded by having explosive diarrhea all over the carpet in fright. FML

#19578544
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15309) - you deserved it (27025)

On 05/05/2012 at 7:07pm - animals - by doggone - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML

#19572377
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10325) - you deserved it (29894)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States

Today, while I was sneaking a boy out of my room at 2am, I ran into my mom sneaking a man into her room. FML

#19568801
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33307) - you deserved it (9693)

On 05/03/2012 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by dentistrygirl - United States

Today, I was to have an important phone interview for a job. I got a call and everything went perfectly, and they said I was hired. Later, I found out that one of my "friends" had gotten one of his buddies to prank call me and make sure the line was engaged when the real interviewer called. FML

#19564521
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27175) - you deserved it (1573)

On 05/02/2012 at 5:58pm - work - by panther of the desert (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, my husband informed me that he has been purposely finishing before me in bed as a form of punishment for beating him at Mario Kart. FML

#19563136
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28470) - you deserved it (5827)

On 05/02/2012 at 11:46am - intimacy - by winnerwinner (woman) - United States

Today, I was talking to my co-workers about how I've sadly been an orphan since an early age. One of them exclaimed, "Hey, just like Batman!" FML

#19557716
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18688) - you deserved it (4135)

On 05/01/2012 at 9:58am - work - by Nice (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend yet again unsuccessfully tried to hold in uncontrollable giggling every time I moaned or sighed during sex. He's 24. I'm terrified of his reaction should I ever reach an orgasm with him. FML

#19557308
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22983) - you deserved it (2584)

On 05/01/2012 at 7:02am - intimacy - by epicsquishii (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I blacked out at a wedding as a bridesmaid, during the service. FML

#19550881
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17653) - you deserved it (3281)

On 04/29/2012 at 10:53pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. She didnt look away and we stared at each other for a while; then she asked me what I wanted from McDonalds. FML

#19547170
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31412) - you deserved it (8087)

On 04/29/2012 at 11:10am - intimacy - by ShadowJack - United States

Today, I was looking through my roommate's room trying to find a DVD, when I stumbled upon a bundle of pictures of me showering and sleeping. FML



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