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Cristian89

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Cristian89

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 9 June 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2194
  • Number of comments : 63
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Cristian89 : Just here for the laughs :D
Ask for my kik if you wanna chat

Cristian89's page activity

Visits<b>Dozer1988</b> - 10 hours ago<b>RedNinjaTurtle</b> - 12 hours ago<b>sweetest_jenn</b> - 13 hours ago<b>jojoluv132</b> - 14 hours ago<b>colton_colton</b> - 22 hours ago<b>rachangie</b> - 24 hours ago<b>CurlyQute</b> - yesterday at 2:05pm<b>sh07</b> - yesterday at 1:24pm<b>Aquamarine9</b> - yesterday at 11:55am<b>killer0689</b> - yesterday at 3:24am<b>mif</b> - yesterday at 11:50pm<b>AFaye3964</b> - yesterday at 9:46pm<b>GenaALazer</b> - yesterday at 9:13pm<b>aliceanon</b> - yesterday at 8:33pm<b>sammy1021</b> - yesterday at 5:39pm<b>tjcall12</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 7:21am<b>Vanshikap</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 7:15am<b>Pesticides</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 3:39am

Cristian89's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of Cristian89's badges

Cristian89's favorite FMLs

Today, I got home from work and found my dog missing. When I asked my neighbor if she saw what happened, I saw my dog sleeping on her couch. She tried to say it was hers. FML

#20868590
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48422) - you deserved it (2612)

On 09/05/2013 at 7:02am - animals - by GotMyBitchBack - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend took me to a very elegant and expensive restaurant to celebrate our anniversary. When it came to the check, I volunteered to pitch in half, which he rejected by saying "I got it". Little did I know was that "I got it" was short for "I got your credit card". FML

#20868496
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42029) - you deserved it (3091)

On 09/05/2013 at 3:24am - misc - by IGOTIT (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I used a restroom. While doing my thing, the power in my building completely went out. There was another person in the restroom making demonic noises and scratching at my stall. When the power came back on, he was gone. I think I'm being haunted. FML

#20867818
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44233) - you deserved it (2979)

On 09/04/2013 at 6:46pm - work - by dear god help me. - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my car window got smashed, because someone somehow confused the doll my daughter always leaves strapped into a carseat for an actual kid. It's a cabbage patch kid. FML

#20867513
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46248) - you deserved it (3634)

On 09/04/2013 at 2:10pm - kids - by mother to an ugly doll - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

#20864782
513 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17814) - you deserved it (127742)

On 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, after months of patiently waiting, I finally got my roommates out of the house for the night so I could have sex with my boyfriend for the first time without being interrupted. He couldn't get it up. FML

#20864109
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52446) - you deserved it (6698)

On 09/02/2013 at 2:49am - intimacy - by Kiddo (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, we went boating with friends. For some reason the bottom of our tube deflated, causing me to be bounced roughly up and down on the water. As a result, I had the most intense orgasm of my entire life, while sitting 2 inches away from my dad's friend. He definitely noticed. FML

#20862305
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56070) - you deserved it (5979)

On 08/31/2013 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by SplishSplash (woman) - United States

Today, I had an asthma attack while in bed with my boyfriend. He interrupted my desperate coughing only to tell me to shut up. He then rolled over to go back to sleep. FML

#20862012
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39770) - you deserved it (3611)

On 08/31/2013 at 4:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Akershus)

Today, I went skinny-dipping with my friends. At one point, I jokingly pointed out how one of them had the smallest boobs of us all. She calmly got out of the pond, dried herself, scooped up our clothes and phones, and drove off in her car. The cops she called arrived soon after. FML

#20861665
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22030) - you deserved it (64827)

On 08/31/2013 at 12:25pm - misc - by criminal tit offender - United States (Alabama)

Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML

#20861263
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42943) - you deserved it (7327)

On 08/31/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by fartz (woman) - United States

Today, I brought my Japanese girlfriend home for dinner with my family for the first time. They all got drunk and made heaps of racist jokes right in front of us. My dad forgot her name and started calling her "Rice Ball" instead. FML

#20858245
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55732) - you deserved it (4414)

On 08/28/2013 at 6:35pm - love - by Thanks everyone (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I went down on my boyfriend, and tried out a new trick I learned. I read in a magazine that if you hum while giving oral, it's supposed to feel good. My boyfriend started laughing and told me to stop after 30 seconds because I reminded him of his singing toothbrush. FML

#20857818
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49352) - you deserved it (9242)

On 08/28/2013 at 12:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me for "cheating" on him by using a vibrator. FML

#20851263
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52710) - you deserved it (15709)

On 08/23/2013 at 7:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my 17-year-old son came home with a black eye saying he ran into a pole at school. I asked the principal if we could see the tapes. He actually did run straight into a pole. And not just once, twice. FML

Today, my 26-year-old boyfriend came to my apartment to spend the night for the first time. He brought a "blankie" that he insisted was the only thing that could help him sleep. That "blankie" was his ex-girlfriend's silk nightgown. FML

#20833570
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52004) - you deserved it (3940)

On 08/12/2013 at 10:30am - love - by iwearsilkgownstoeatwaffles (woman) - United States (Texas)



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