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Cristian89

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Cristian89

3Liked!

Cristian89
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 9 June 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3632
  • Number of comments : 68
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Cristian89 : Just here for the laughs :D
Ask for my kik if you wanna chat

Cristian89's page activity

Visits<b>tiptoe55</b> - yesterday at 1:36pm<b>mk1hate1my1job1</b> - yesterday at 8:09am<b>KatlynBrooke</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 11:58pm<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 9:10pm<b>katiebug2968</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 1:06pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 9:19pm<b>isabellasimone</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 8:44pm<b>hare</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 4:10am<b>missa8604</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 11:35pm<b>princesstavi</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 8:20pm<b>NessieMonster188</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 10:25pm<b>krupa1017</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 9:04pm<b>mcintosh123</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 11:31pm<b>nataliewby</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 10:34pm<b>Lilly_974</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 10:29pm<b>Queen_Bitch69</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 11:16am<b>Jenn_love69</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 9:59am<b>jadeluv</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 9:30am

Liked!<b>fooltemptress</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 6:22am<b>KurlyQ</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 12:56am<b>miliaras93</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 9:34am

Cristian89's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of Cristian89's badges

Cristian89's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my 4-year-old son to the bank with me. He asked why we were going, and I explained that I had a couple of checks that they would turn into money. When we got in line, he loudly exclaimed that "Mommy has checks for money!" Except "checks" sounded almost exactly like "sex". FML

#20875776
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47485) - you deserved it (4076)

On 09/10/2013 at 2:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while at the zoo, I found out that the rhinos there can pee backwards, while standing directly behind one. FML

#20874616
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38213) - you deserved it (4061)

On 09/09/2013 at 4:51pm - animals - by Are you kidding me? - United States (Kansas)

Today, I woke up and found $30 slipped under my door with a note that read, "Please buy yourself a quieter vibrator. -Mom and Dad." FML

#20874309
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55821) - you deserved it (23249)

On 09/09/2013 at 11:15am - intimacy - by anon (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I took my girlfriend to a public place before confessing that I've been seeing another woman, to avoid a dramatic scene. After being rushed to the hospital with a concussion and broken nose, I think it's safe to say my plan didn't go very well. FML

#20873101
352 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19647) - you deserved it (98988)

On 09/08/2013 at 3:31pm - love - by verbaltodomestic (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my mom was sharing the story of how I was born with the umbilical cord around my neck. My sister added that it was God's first attempt to kill me off. FML

Today, for the third time since breakfast, I accidentally walked in on my father wanking. FML

#20870154
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50544) - you deserved it (6290)

On 09/06/2013 at 12:48pm - intimacy - by jesus christ, dad (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I got home from work and found my dog missing. When I asked my neighbor if she saw what happened, I saw my dog sleeping on her couch. She tried to say it was hers. FML

#20868590
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49255) - you deserved it (2669)

On 09/05/2013 at 7:02am - animals - by GotMyBitchBack - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend took me to a very elegant and expensive restaurant to celebrate our anniversary. When it came to the check, I volunteered to pitch in half, which he rejected by saying "I got it". Little did I know was that "I got it" was short for "I got your credit card". FML

#20868496
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42531) - you deserved it (3123)

On 09/05/2013 at 3:24am - misc - by IGOTIT (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I used a restroom. While doing my thing, the power in my building completely went out. There was another person in the restroom making demonic noises and scratching at my stall. When the power came back on, he was gone. I think I'm being haunted. FML

#20867818
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45247) - you deserved it (3069)

On 09/04/2013 at 6:46pm - work - by dear god help me. - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my car window got smashed, because someone somehow confused the doll my daughter always leaves strapped into a carseat for an actual kid. It's a cabbage patch kid. FML

#20867513
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46502) - you deserved it (3664)

On 09/04/2013 at 2:10pm - kids - by mother to an ugly doll - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

#20864782
519 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17875) - you deserved it (128900)

On 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, after months of patiently waiting, I finally got my roommates out of the house for the night so I could have sex with my boyfriend for the first time without being interrupted. He couldn't get it up. FML

#20864109
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52793) - you deserved it (6729)

On 09/02/2013 at 2:49am - intimacy - by Kiddo (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, we went boating with friends. For some reason the bottom of our tube deflated, causing me to be bounced roughly up and down on the water. As a result, I had the most intense orgasm of my entire life, while sitting 2 inches away from my dad's friend. He definitely noticed. FML

#20862305
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56334) - you deserved it (6003)

On 08/31/2013 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by SplishSplash (woman) - United States

Today, I had an asthma attack while in bed with my boyfriend. He interrupted my desperate coughing only to tell me to shut up. He then rolled over to go back to sleep. FML

#20862012
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39870) - you deserved it (3620)

On 08/31/2013 at 4:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Akershus)

Today, I went skinny-dipping with my friends. At one point, I jokingly pointed out how one of them had the smallest boobs of us all. She calmly got out of the pond, dried herself, scooped up our clothes and phones, and drove off in her car. The cops she called arrived soon after. FML

#20861665
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22249) - you deserved it (65394)

On 08/31/2013 at 12:25pm - misc - by criminal tit offender - United States (Alabama)



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