Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Cristian89

Offline (one hour ago) | Search for a member

Cristian89

3Liked!

Cristian89
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 9 June 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3591
  • Number of comments : 68
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Cristian89 : Just here for the laughs :D
Ask for my kik if you wanna chat

Cristian89's page activity

Visits<b>10nachoman10</b> - 10 hours ago<b>isabellasimone</b> - 10 hours ago<b>hare</b> - yesterday at 4:10am<b>missa8604</b> - yesterday at 11:35pm<b>princesstavi</b> - yesterday at 8:20pm<b>NessieMonster188</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 10:25pm<b>krupa1017</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 9:04pm<b>mcintosh123</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 11:31pm<b>nataliewby</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 10:34pm<b>Lilly_974</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 10:29pm<b>Queen_Bitch69</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 11:16am<b>Jenn_love69</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 9:59am<b>jadeluv</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 9:30am<b>AHSFan</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 9:07am<b>herecomestheboom</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 3:01pm<b>qdawg06</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 12:49am<b>sammy1021</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 8:36pm<b>cutiepie600</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 2:16pm

Liked!<b>fooltemptress</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 6:22am<b>KurlyQ</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 12:56am<b>miliaras93</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 9:34am

Cristian89's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of Cristian89's badges

Cristian89's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up late and had to rush to catch my bus. Upon arriving at school, I was hot from running and took off my sweater. It was then, in a lecture hall with 400 people, that I realised I hadn't put a shirt on underneath. FML

#20945220
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45874) - you deserved it (10196)

On 11/04/2013 at 2:17pm - misc - by barebackingit (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my car keys are in my house and my house keys are in my car, and I'm in neither. FML

#20943997
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47027) - you deserved it (8458)

On 11/03/2013 at 3:18pm - misc - by Argh (man) - France (Poitou-Charentes)

Today, my husband was getting undressed. I told my 2-year-old daughter not to go in our bedroom because he was undressing in there. I turned my back and she instantly ran off to my bedroom. I heard her shout "I can see daddy's tail!" Now, she points to everyone's crotch and shouts "TAIL!" FML

#20943580
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49801) - you deserved it (6392)

On 11/03/2013 at 9:22am - kids - by KittyKat (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, I got a new cell phone number and sent a text to my wife. Playing around, I said, "Hey sexy are you alone yet? I'm ready to come over." She responded with, "Hey, yeah he is at work - did you get a new number?" FML

#20941049
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86570) - you deserved it (6193)

On 11/01/2013 at 3:01am - intimacy - by PapaW - United States (Utah)

Today, I found out my 13-year-old daughter thinks the showerhead got her pregnant. FML

Today, I rushed to a dentist's appointment. Once in the chair, I apologized for not having had the time to brush my teeth beforehand. He responded with, "Ah that's alright, I just took a piss and forgot to wash my hands." FML

#20937985
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45815) - you deserved it (12427)

On 10/29/2013 at 2:57pm - health - by Anonymous - Zimbabwe

Today, my boyfriend and I watched Star Trek Into Darkness together. He liked it so much that he's now chosen to yell "KHAAANNNNN!" as he cums. FML

#20933461
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41158) - you deserved it (6562)

On 10/25/2013 at 1:17pm - intimacy - by NOKHAN (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found out through one of my friends that my boyfriend cheated on me. He says it doesn't count as cheating because he couldn't get it up. FML

#20930754
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49437) - you deserved it (4152)

On 10/23/2013 at 3:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend sent me a nude picture. I would have been fine with it if he hadn't taken it in his ex-girlfriend's room. FML

#20925937
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52735) - you deserved it (4213)

On 10/19/2013 at 1:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

#20925183
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27217) - you deserved it (39063)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went on a first date. He left me standing at a bus stop while he took a dump in some bushes. FML

#20922179
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47800) - you deserved it (4334)

On 10/15/2013 at 11:10pm - love - by highlydisgusted - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I started to come to during dental surgery. I clearly heard someone behind me say "Shit! Get this fucker back under!" then another person mentioning they'd have to kill me to avoid "another lawsuit", followed by laughter and the blackness of sleep. FML

#20909921
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57149) - you deserved it (3378)

On 10/06/2013 at 5:49pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I pretended to be deaf to a door to door salesman. He knew sign language. FML

#20907982
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21256) - you deserved it (47788)

On 10/05/2013 at 2:56am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I accidentally texted a picture of my cock to my dad. FML

#20907559
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25733) - you deserved it (77920)

On 10/04/2013 at 7:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while in bed, my boyfriend pointed to my stomach and said, "Bad fat", then pointed to my boobs and said, "Good fat." FML

#20906869
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51906) - you deserved it (7211)

On 10/04/2013 at 4:20am - misc - by f.a.t. (woman) - Australia



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: