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Cristian89

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Cristian89

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 9 June 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2122
  • Number of comments : 63
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Cristian89 : Just here for the laughs :D
Ask for my kik if you wanna chat

Cristian89's page activity

Visits<b>seemetrot</b> - 15 hours ago<b>ROMAD</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 7:46am<b>ButterflyHaze</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 2:53pm<b>louisdenis805</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 11:46am<b>kaylaaa01</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 1:09am<b>Peck_Kcep</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 12:12am<b>nela25</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 10:51pm<b>SierraaaNicoleee</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 8:07am<b>BFons</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 2:12am<b>soccerforlife_27</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 12:36am<b>xIlluminated</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 11:15pm<b>KawaiiSushii</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 6:49pm<b>emleighb</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 5:52pm<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 3:50pm<b>watermelon1</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 3:38pm<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 1:18pm<b>marieeecc</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 8:04am<b>Anapaob</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 4:38am

Cristian89's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of Cristian89's badges

Cristian89's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up from a drunken one-night-stand. The person I slept with turned out to be heavily pregnant. She tried to convince me that I am the father and that I passed out for 7 months. FML

Today, I had a seizure in class. Being an epileptic, I had warned my professor of the possibility that I could have one in class. She was understanding and seemed very concerned about my issue at the time. After I had the seizure, however, she asked me if I had ever tried exorcism. FML

#20963219
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41759) - you deserved it (2272)

On 11/19/2013 at 10:00am - health - by seizuregirl17 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I realized I need to start hitting the gym, when my boyfriend actually utilized my love handles during sex. FML

Today, my boyfriend of three years sent me a text message saying "It's over!". I sent him maybe a thousand texts saying "Why?", "What do you mean?!" After an hour of crying and whatnot, I realized he had driver's education today and that he was saying the class was over. FML

#20959504
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29173) - you deserved it (44012)

On 11/16/2013 at 5:06am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while feeling sick, I decided to go to a furniture store to sit down for a few minutes. I'm now the proud owner of an expensive, vomit-stained recliner. FML

Today, I realized how amazing I've become at faking orgasms: I made up everything from the noises of my juices to pure, blissful climax over the phone to my husband. He came; I finished putting laundry away. FML

#20955991
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43454) - you deserved it (11276)

On 11/13/2013 at 1:40am - intimacy - by CanWeAllGetOne - United States (Texas)

Today, as always, my boyfriend has the ability to pop his eyeballs out of his eye sockets. He thought it'd be funny for me to wake up face-to-face with the disgusting sight. The shit in my bowels did an early Thanksgiving Day parade straight into my underwear. FML

#20952990
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41241) - you deserved it (3752)

On 11/10/2013 at 6:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my husband and I went for our 20 week scan and found out we're having a girl. The first thing he said to me was, "The next one better be a boy or I'm leaving you". FML

#20952357
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49019) - you deserved it (4359)

On 11/10/2013 at 5:28am - kids - by Naomi - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I woke up late and had to rush to catch my bus. Upon arriving at school, I was hot from running and took off my sweater. It was then, in a lecture hall with 400 people, that I realised I hadn't put a shirt on underneath. FML

#20945220
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44864) - you deserved it (9916)

On 11/04/2013 at 2:17pm - misc - by barebackingit (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my car keys are in my house and my house keys are in my car, and I'm in neither. FML

#20943997
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45942) - you deserved it (8276)

On 11/03/2013 at 3:18pm - misc - by Argh (man) - France (Poitou-Charentes)

Today, my husband was getting undressed. I told my 2-year-old daughter not to go in our bedroom because he was undressing in there. I turned my back and she instantly ran off to my bedroom. I heard her shout "I can see daddy's tail!" Now, she points to everyone's crotch and shouts "TAIL!" FML

#20943580
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46466) - you deserved it (5546)

On 11/03/2013 at 9:22am - kids - by KittyKat (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, I got a new cell phone number and sent a text to my wife. Playing around, I said, "Hey sexy are you alone yet? I'm ready to come over." She responded with, "Hey, yeah he is at work - did you get a new number?" FML

#20941049
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80413) - you deserved it (4605)

On 11/01/2013 at 3:01am - intimacy - by PapaW - United States (Utah)

Today, I found out my 13-year-old daughter thinks the showerhead got her pregnant. FML

Today, I rushed to a dentist's appointment. Once in the chair, I apologized for not having had the time to brush my teeth beforehand. He responded with, "Ah that's alright, I just took a piss and forgot to wash my hands." FML

#20937985
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43336) - you deserved it (11361)

On 10/29/2013 at 2:57pm - health - by Anonymous - Zimbabwe

Today, my boyfriend and I watched Star Trek Into Darkness together. He liked it so much that he's now chosen to yell "KHAAANNNNN!" as he cums. FML

#20933461
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39157) - you deserved it (6216)

On 10/25/2013 at 1:17pm - intimacy - by NOKHAN (woman) - United States (North Carolina)



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