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  • Town/Country : Covina, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 9 June 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8461
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Cristian89 : Just here for the laughs 😄
Add me on SnapChat : chinchilla.89

Cristian89's page activity

Visits<b>hannah_nana109</b> - the 09/24/2016 at 4:34pm<b>monkeysee21</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 1:36am<b>Jesmassimo</b> - the 09/09/2016 at 9:24am<b>leafynitemare</b> - the 08/25/2016 at 5:28am<b>beffnytutt</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 10:31pm<b>tiredofwaiting</b> - the 08/21/2016 at 2:21am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 6:51pm<b>2simz</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 12:44am<b>MDoremis</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 12:19am<b>EddySaBoy</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 4:56am<b>badassmf1234</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 10:45pm<b>nadiabjensen</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 6:27pm<b>anonymous0110902</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 9:26am<b>usedername</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 9:05pm<b>SWhimsynBubbaS</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 12:05am<b>DerSuldam</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 9:54am<b>RedCronos</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 2:33am<b>StarDust5921</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 11:22pm

Fucked!<b>usedername</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 3:05am<b>HighlandShadows</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 12:29am<b>sarahyep</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 10:08am<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 7:25pm<b>KVYLV</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 6:15am<b>marthagayo</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 4:22am<b>nikkichanxoxo</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 6:19pm<b>nofreeusernames</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 5:41am<b>fooltemptress</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 6:22am<b>KurlyQ</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 12:56am<b>miliaras93</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 9:34am

Cristian89's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of Cristian89's badges

Cristian89's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I are sick. He keeps whining about how bad he feels. I'm just as sick, as well as 7 months pregnant. I've not only been taking care of his whiny ass: I've cooked, cleaned, and gone to the store several times because the tissues we had were too rough on his nose. FML

by AnonWife / 01/21/2014 at 8:16pm / United Kingdom (North Lincolnshire) / Health

Today, my husband and I decided to have a quickie before the kids woke up from their nap. The sex was amazing and I couldn't hold in my screams or not hit the wall. About 15 minutes in, both of our children came busting in with their nerf guns, screaming, "Where's the monster?" FML

by anon / 01/12/2014 at 8:53pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, after his sixth beer, my dad looked me in the eye and said "I've never forgiven you for what you did to your mother's vagina". FML

by Anonymous / 01/12/2014 at 1:38am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I texted my boyfriend of two years and asked if he wanted to go to ball with me. His response was "The person you are trying to message cancelled their phone service and moved to Mexico. Taco taco burrito." I'll take that as a no. FML

by rollergirl13 / 01/11/2014 at 12:55am / United States (Alaska) / Love

Today, we were playing charades at school. My word was "head", so I pointed to my face. Nobody on my team got it. But they did guess, "Ugly?!" FML

by kyyle / 01/10/2014 at 11:02pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realised after showering that I didn't have a towel, so I thought I would risk a naked dash to my brother's room to steal one of his. He and his friend were in the room and both agreed that I needed a "trim". FML

by Anonymous / 01/06/2014 at 1:59pm / South Africa / Intimacy

Today, was my first day as a male cheerleader in an attempt to flirt. The girls were stronger than me and it's now my job to be thrown in the air by girls. FML

by give me an F / 01/05/2014 at 11:16am / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Love

Today, I got a text from my girlfriend. After only having sex once, where I wore a condom and didn't even get to come, she says that she's pregnant. FML

by fuckmuppeter512 / 01/04/2014 at 5:26pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of bananas. This evening, the phobia came to a head when I had a nightmare in which I was stabbed to death by a gang of walking bananas. FML

by Elisa_LmR / 01/03/2014 at 6:28pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, I realized just how lonely I am when I tried to time my ejaculation to happen right as the new year started. FML

by Lonesome / 01/01/2014 at 1:41am / United States (Louisiana) / Intimacy

Today, like every day since I was born, my name is Yarenis, pronounced "ja-ra-nees. For some reason, everybody pronounce it "your anus". FML

by yarenis / 12/24/2013 at 5:45am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. As he came, he yelled "FIRST, BITCHES!" FML

by Anonymous / 12/14/2013 at 1:50pm / Intimacy

Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He seemed thrilled, and went to buy some wine to celebrate. He left 11 hours ago and won't come back. FML

by Anonymous / 12/14/2013 at 2:24am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I woke up in my hospital bed after having knee surgery, on the wrong knee. FML

by knee pain / 12/09/2013 at 2:17pm / United States / Health