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Cristian89

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Cristian89

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Cristian89Cristian89
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 9 June 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3995
  • Number of comments : 68
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Cristian89 : Just here for the laughs :D
Ask for my kik if you wanna chat

Cristian89's page activity

Visits<b>vampy719</b> - 13 hours ago<b>missa8604</b> - yesterday at 7:52am<b>Bazinga90</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 12:52am<b>Marzell</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 10:37pm<b>bloo_isanonymous</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 4:44pm<b>changster_</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 4:43pm<b>awkotaco333</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 4:33pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 2:41am<b>Nerdgurl86</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 11:40pm<b>ifoundwaldo123</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 5:33pm<b>JuliaaNoelle</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 10:37pm<b>nikkichanxoxo</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 12:19pm<b>isabellasimone</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 9:41am<b>srinathmatti</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 2:51am<b>brook823</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 12:22am<b>yorkie_16</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 11:57pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 11:02pm<b>M_F06_25</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 7:55pm

Liked!<b>nikkichanxoxo</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 6:19pm<b>nofreeusernames</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 5:41am<b>fooltemptress</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 6:22am<b>KurlyQ</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 12:56am<b>miliaras93</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 9:34am

Cristian89's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of Cristian89's badges

Cristian89's favorite FMLs

Today, I placed a Bible app next to an app I use for porn, in the hope that it will encourage me to watch less porn. I'm a girl. FML

Today, my naked boyfriend walked up to me with my towel around his neck and with a hard-on, then declared he was "The Penis Man" and slapped me with his junk. I thought I was dating a man, not a man-child. FML

#20782097
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48071) - you deserved it (16548)

On 07/14/2013 at 1:03pm - intimacy - by peniswoman (woman) - United Kingdom (Renfrewshire)

Today, while on the airplane, the cute girl next to me and I instantly hit it off. When I excused myself to the bathroom, I must have given her the wrong impression. She wanted to join the mile high club; I just wanted to take a crap. FML

#20781742
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58542) - you deserved it (12251)

On 07/14/2013 at 6:41am - intimacy - by mile high clubber - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I woke up to a strange noise. I looked over to see my drunk husband standing at the dresser. I asked him what he was doing. "Peeing." I asked him, "In the sock drawer?" There was a pause. "Am I peeing in the wrong drawer?" FML

#20779714
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51279) - you deserved it (4233)

On 07/13/2013 at 10:32am - misc - by speechless - United States (Indiana)

Today, I had my driver's test in rural Maine. I hit a cow. FML

#20777070
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46875) - you deserved it (13201)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I let my 3-year-old daughter watch Finding Nemo on my phone while I made her lunch. I returned to find she had dropped my phone into the fish bowl so that her goldfish could see his friends. FML

#20776430
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46736) - you deserved it (17194)

On 07/11/2013 at 7:13pm - kids - by thanks, Nemo. - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was eating a corndog, when my boyfriend jokingly told me to "take it deeper". I did, and ended up choking and throwing up all over the table. FML

#20775966
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26030) - you deserved it (49212)

On 07/11/2013 at 1:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 13-year-old daughter and I went to a tropical themed restaurant. She wanted a strawberry Daiquiri, so I asked the waitress for a virgin strawberry Daiquiri. My daughter then said, "But dad, I'm not a virgin." FML

#20775827
338 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99745) - you deserved it (11645)

On 07/11/2013 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out my boyfriend regularly has his ex stay over. They even share a bed. He doesn't see a problem with this. FML

#20774058
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57883) - you deserved it (5236)

On 07/10/2013 at 10:18am - love - by Paige (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I got a message from my brother on Facebook that read, "They're watching you." This wouldn't have been such a big deal if he hadn't been dead for two years. FML

#20773595
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76156) - you deserved it (3705)

On 07/10/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Wtf (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while leaving McDonald's, I threw a fry out the window to a flock of seagulls. I watched in the rear-view mirror as it landed in the opposite lane and about 60 winged rats descended upon the street, causing a truck to veer off the road and crash. FML

#20773275
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27408) - you deserved it (45903)

On 07/09/2013 at 10:48pm - misc - by John - United States

Today, my aunt had the wonderful experience of hearing my boyfriend and I have a very "satisfying" encounter after we stupidly forgot to turn off the baby monitor. FML

#20772295
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30228) - you deserved it (45275)

On 07/09/2013 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by embarrassed niece (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML

#20772281
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52266) - you deserved it (21132)

On 07/09/2013 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband and I threw a party with non-alcoholic wine. No one acted wasted, until in the last hour my grandmother started slurring her words and slumping. We thought she was joking, until a doctor at the party confirmed she was having a stroke. FML

Today, my husband and I threw a party with non-alcoholic wine. No one acted wasted, until in the last hour my grandmother started slurring her words and slumping. We thought she was joking, until a doctor at the party confirmed she was having a stroke. FML



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