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Cristian89

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Cristian89

9Fucked!

Cristian89
  • Town/Country : Covina, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 9 June 1989 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6385
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Cristian89 : Just here for the laughs 😄

Cristian89's page activity

Visits<b>reagan_compton</b> - yesterday at 8:51am<b>KVYLV</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 11:42pm<b>kutchbabe</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 4:07am<b>emhope5868</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 9:52pm<b>sarahyep</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 10:20pm<b>nina0917</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 4:59pm<b>mariah_1_11</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 3:34pm<b>FatKitty</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 9:35am<b>tiwan</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 2:57am<b>CandyDawg</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 12:36am<b>vikibloom</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 12:29am<b>Way2Fast8</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 12:01am<b>dillonfi</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 12:00am<b>actuallythoo</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 10:49pm<b>LilyLi</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 5:37pm<b>tigerzroze</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 5:27pm<b>maravillosaaaa</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 4:00pm<b>reggie87</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 2:43pm

Fucked!<b>sarahyep</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 10:08am<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 7:25pm<b>KVYLV</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 6:15am<b>marthagayo</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 4:22am<b>nikkichanxoxo</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 6:19pm<b>nofreeusernames</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 5:41am<b>fooltemptress</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 6:22am<b>KurlyQ</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 12:56am<b>miliaras93</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 9:34am

Cristian89's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of Cristian89's badges

Cristian89's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in a restroom, reading this site, when another gentleman walked in. He washed his hands, dried them, nodded at me, then left. It wouldn't ordinarily be so weird, except I was in a one-person restroom. FML

#20784458
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51335) - you deserved it (8490)

On 07/15/2013 at 3:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I placed a Bible app next to an app I use for porn, in the hope that it will encourage me to watch less porn. I'm a girl. FML

Today, my naked boyfriend walked up to me with my towel around his neck and with a hard-on, then declared he was "The Penis Man" and slapped me with his junk. I thought I was dating a man, not a man-child. FML

#20782097
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49841) - you deserved it (17068)

On 07/14/2013 at 1:03pm - intimacy - by peniswoman (woman) - United Kingdom (Renfrewshire)

Today, while on the airplane, the cute girl next to me and I instantly hit it off. When I excused myself to the bathroom, I must have given her the wrong impression. She wanted to join the mile high club; I just wanted to take a crap. FML

#20781742
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58792) - you deserved it (12305)

On 07/14/2013 at 6:41am - intimacy - by mile high clubber - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I woke up to a strange noise. I looked over to see my drunk husband standing at the dresser. I asked him what he was doing. "Peeing." I asked him, "In the sock drawer?" There was a pause. "Am I peeing in the wrong drawer?" FML

#20779714
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52830) - you deserved it (4354)

On 07/13/2013 at 10:32am - misc - by speechless - United States (Indiana)

Today, I had my driver's test in rural Maine. I hit a cow. FML

#20777070
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48065) - you deserved it (13550)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I let my 3-year-old daughter watch Finding Nemo on my phone while I made her lunch. I returned to find she had dropped my phone into the fish bowl so that her goldfish could see his friends. FML

#20776430
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48723) - you deserved it (17844)

On 07/11/2013 at 7:13pm - kids - by thanks, Nemo. - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was eating a corndog, when my boyfriend jokingly told me to "take it deeper". I did, and ended up choking and throwing up all over the table. FML

#20775966
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27203) - you deserved it (51239)

On 07/11/2013 at 1:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 13-year-old daughter and I went to a tropical themed restaurant. She wanted a strawberry Daiquiri, so I asked the waitress for a virgin strawberry Daiquiri. My daughter then said, "But dad, I'm not a virgin." FML

#20775827
339 comments

I agree, your life sucks (100389) - you deserved it (11706)

On 07/11/2013 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out my boyfriend regularly has his ex stay over. They even share a bed. He doesn't see a problem with this. FML

#20774058
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58123) - you deserved it (5247)

On 07/10/2013 at 10:18am - love - by Paige (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I got a message from my brother on Facebook that read, "They're watching you." This wouldn't have been such a big deal if he hadn't been dead for two years. FML

#20773595
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76420) - you deserved it (3866)

On 07/10/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Wtf (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while leaving McDonald's, I threw a fry out the window to a flock of seagulls. I watched in the rear-view mirror as it landed in the opposite lane and about 60 winged rats descended upon the street, causing a truck to veer off the road and crash. FML

#20773275
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27511) - you deserved it (46109)

On 07/09/2013 at 10:48pm - misc - by John - United States

Today, my aunt had the wonderful experience of hearing my boyfriend and I have a very "satisfying" encounter after we stupidly forgot to turn off the baby monitor. FML

#20772295
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31542) - you deserved it (46860)

On 07/09/2013 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by embarrassed niece (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML

#20772281
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52444) - you deserved it (21198)

On 07/09/2013 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband and I threw a party with non-alcoholic wine. No one acted wasted, until in the last hour my grandmother started slurring her words and slumping. We thought she was joking, until a doctor at the party confirmed she was having a stroke. FML



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