Crephix

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Crephix

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 4 September 1989 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 966
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Crephix : What do you want to know?

Crephix's page activity

Visits<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 10:22pm<b>puppyXluvz123</b> - the 04/09/2013 at 10:39pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 9:13am

Crephix's FML badges

Mobility

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Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Crephix's favorite FMLs

Today, I was fired from my job. Apparently getting shot is no valid reason to stay home. FML

by davka / 04/18/2011 at 11:09am / Work

Today, I was finally having sex with the man of my dreams, and then he fell asleep on top of me. FML

by Anonymous / 04/17/2011 at 11:12pm / United States (South Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, in an attempt to get my son to stop playing Call of Duty, I threw his Xbox controller out the window. He was so desperate, he followed it. His bedroom is on the second floor. My son has 3 broken ribs, and no future. FML

by failureparent / 03/20/2011 at 9:25pm / United States (California) / Geek

Today, I woke up after a night out drinking on my sofa, with an electric dog collar around my neck and handcuffs on my wrists. The keys were on the other side of the invisible doggy fence. FML

by stupiddrunk / 02/28/2011 at 8:10pm / United Kingdom (London) / Health

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML

by Wisconsin love / 12/13/2010 at 12:35pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that you can get arrested for holding up a 'free hugs' sign. FML

by nonameLiz / 02/02/2010 at 8:16pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was letting my boyfriend of 4 years tie me up and do stuff to me. After finishing on my face, he then left. My parents had to untie me. FML

by chanclepants / 01/27/2010 at 8:35am / Intimacy

Today, some drunk dude broke into my house while my parents were out. Scared, I asked him what he wanted, his response was "cookies." FML

Today, I thought my online boyfriend was calling me, so the first line I said was "Hey, Baby." His wife answered with, "This is Jenny. Who's this?" After speaking for thirty minutes, I found out he's married, fifty-eight, and has two kids. I'm seventeen. FML

by omgitserika / 11/18/2009 at 10:09am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I awoke in bed with my boyfriend and his dog. After some pushing and prodding, I thought my boyfriend was trying to move the dog out of the way to cuddle with me. It turns out, he was moving the dog closer to him. My boyfriend would rather spoon with his dog than me. FML

by chachi / 09/28/2009 at 2:25pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I was awakened by the sound of chain-saws. Moments later a tree branch came through my roof. FML

by 1ndustrytx / 09/04/2009 at 12:46pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, after a night of partying, I woke up in the middle of my co-ed dorm lobby to the sound of giggles. I was in a thong with $1 monopoly bills sticking out. I'm a guy. FML

by joedoe / 07/18/2009 at 2:03am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to announce to my son that I am pregnant again. After I told him, he looks up and yells: "fuck this shit!" and walks out of the room. My son is nine years old. FML

by poormom / 06/27/2009 at 12:05am / United States (Illinois) / Kids

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my boyfriend to ravish me. He told me he would rather play PS3. FML

by fml_for_real / 02/04/2009 at 12:04pm / United States (New York) / Love