Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

CrackCrazedMonky

Offline (the 10/31/2014 at 6:19pm) | Search for a member

CrackCrazedMonky

1Liked!

CrackCrazedMonkyCrackCrazedMonky
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 January 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 187
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About CrackCrazedMonky : Just an a average guy in a unique world. Enjoy sports, mainly the Redsox and Penguins, reading, watching movies, and spending time with my little girl. Want to talk? Hit me up. I'll talk about anything.

CrackCrazedMonky's page activity

Visits<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 8:31am<b>rapunzel3416</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 2:17am<b>thee_most_dope</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 12:26am<b>Mc2013</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 9:39pm<b>jad0016</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 9:35pm<b>abbyycarper</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 5:17pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 5:56am<b>turtlescape</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 10:56am<b>cherrio27</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 11:01pm<b>andiiibandiii526</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 12:20pm<b>shufflyn</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 4:38pm<b>Space_Teddy</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 6:02am<b>_Alanna_xx</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 1:18pm<b>catherine012</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 4:29pm<b>sanuxo_</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 1:26pm<b>Georgiecan</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 5:33pm<b>KILLROY570</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 4:42am<b>sassypenguinxox</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 1:20pm

Liked!<b>catherine012</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 7:16pm

CrackCrazedMonky's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of CrackCrazedMonky's badges

CrackCrazedMonky's favorite FMLs

Today, my drunk husband came home, got into bed, and started humping the body pillow. He ended up whining about how I hadn't come yet, then angrily slurred that I must be cheating on him. All I could do was stay quiet and wonder how the idiot even made it home alive. FML

#21266933
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46882) - you deserved it (3515)

On 09/28/2014 at 11:30am - intimacy - by tw@ (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, my brother got the same cologne as the guy I've been seeing for a while. Every time I'm with my brother I think about him, and every time I'm with him I think about my brother. FML

#21259922
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38566) - you deserved it (3787)

On 09/17/2014 at 7:46am - love - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

#21258033
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31654) - you deserved it (18221)

On 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm - animals - by Anonymous - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, my boss slapped me across the face with a raw chicken breast. FML

#21243022
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40481) - you deserved it (4652)

On 08/22/2014 at 8:05am - work - by haileelouxxx (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to lose our virginity. When he saw blood, he panicked and started crying, convinced that he was bleeding out. FML

#21242605
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46184) - you deserved it (5169)

On 08/21/2014 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Portugal (Lisboa)

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

Today, I complained to the train company online. I filled in information and added several photos as evidence. I only realised later that the photos I attached were nudes. FML

#21202786
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23812) - you deserved it (56626)

On 07/08/2014 at 12:29pm - intimacy - by anona (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I stubbed the same toe three times in fifteen minutes. How? My sister moved most of the furniture in the house to the left by a few inches, because she thought it would be funny to watch me get confused and suffer. FML

#21183245
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44677) - you deserved it (6544)

On 06/21/2014 at 3:57pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I was talking to one of my British friends online, and he told me to say "yew anchors" a few times really fast. I'm a fairly stupid person, and wasn't very focused, so I did as he said. When I finally figured what the words meant, my dad had heard and grounded me for cursing. FML

#21161539
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30812) - you deserved it (9113)

On 06/03/2014 at 11:36am - kids - by properpissed (man) - United States (California)

Today, at the movies, some asswipe kept throwing candy at me. After 20 minutes of it, I got up and went over to get him to stop. Good news: his balls vanished faster than a politician's spine immediately after being elected. Bad news: I got kicked out for "starting a disturbance". FML

#20952633
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36862) - you deserved it (3375)

On 11/10/2013 at 1:26pm - misc - by fuck you, bitchcake (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, my brother tried to convince me to get a clitoris piercing at his recently opened piercing studio. FML

#20668963
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59774) - you deserved it (6045)

On 05/17/2013 at 12:40pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Varmlands Lan)

Today, my boyfriend was watching TV, when we started getting frisky. I'd just started to give him a blowjob when he pushed me off and said, "Fun's over." Dragon Ball Z had just come back on. He's 21. FML

#20632729
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57177) - you deserved it (14983)

On 04/30/2013 at 1:35pm - intimacy - by SecondBest,IGuess (woman) - United States

Today, someone put a whole packet of glitter on the blades of my ceiling fan. Too bad I only noticed when I turned it on. FML

#20482822
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29300) - you deserved it (3617)

On 01/28/2013 at 8:55am - misc - by hopelessteej (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while attempting the Italian Chandelier with my girlfriend, I heard a popping noise, and then had a sharp pain in my dick. Turns out I "broke" it. Instead of calling 911 immediately, my girlfriend remarked how my now black and blue penis looked like a Smurf. FML

#20003323
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27568) - you deserved it (5850)

On 08/05/2012 at 1:33am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: