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About Cow_Girl_Lilly : I live on a farm. I have 10 cow but 1 who I love to death.
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Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
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Today, I found out that my boyfriend is afraid of a female orgasms. Right as I was about to climax, he panicked, pulled out, and ran into the bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9210) - you deserved it (770)
On 04/05/2012 at 2:47am - intimacy - by displeased - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startled and peed all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21391) - you deserved it (15601)
On 11/09/2011 at 4:52pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, after a year and a half, I finally admitted to myself that I'm in an abusive relationship. Not with a person though, with my cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17862) - you deserved it (6735)
On 11/03/2011 at 6:56am - animals - by Nicole557 (woman) - United States
Today, this weird girl started texting me. I really didn't want to talk to her, so I texted back, "This message could not be delivered because of a temporery network setup error. Error 2128-226110." She replied, "You spelt temporary wrong." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7744) - you deserved it (40562)
On 10/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by tommyboy783 - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40597) - you deserved it (5771)
On 10/18/2011 at 1:34pm - intimacy - by Mini-wanker (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my 17 pound cat fell from a counter. It wouldn't have been a big deal if he didn't try to use my leg as a tree to cling onto on the way down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20569) - you deserved it (3123)
On 07/30/2011 at 7:58pm - animals - by Backinzi - United States (Iowa)
Today, my neighbor and I learned why fireworks are illegal in city limits. This lesson was learned shortly after a roman candle came crashing through my second story window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17302) - you deserved it (5445)
On 07/05/2011 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, my doctor told me to buy some KY Jelly and a dildo to help "loosen me up" so sex isn't so painful. I haven't been able to have sex for 6 months because it hurts so badly, and now my doctor has basically told me to go f*ck myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23945) - you deserved it (5685)
On 11/22/2010 at 2:36pm - intimacy - by painfulintercourse - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I just found out that my ex girlfriend is gonna be my step mother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59820) - you deserved it (2932)
On 11/15/2010 at 6:33am - misc - by xkal174 - United States (New York)
Today, I found out that my best friend lost her virginity to my father. Her excuse? She was drunk. His excuse? "She's hot." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41227) - you deserved it (2779)
On 10/29/2010 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because she said I was more of a woman than she was. I yelled out, "I HATE YOU!" and started to cry. She then took a tampon out of her purse, handed it to me, laughed, and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12653) - you deserved it (49895)
On 07/24/2010 at 6:53am - misc - by GirlishMan1883897 (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I found out that my best friend kisses me while I sleep. We're both guys. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54093) - you deserved it (6044)
On 06/04/2010 at 10:03pm - love - by weirdesout - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend of almost a year and a half broke up with me when he decided he wasn't in love with me anymore. We gave our stuff back, he was joking and happy the whole time until I told him I was taking back my cat. At that point he burst into tears. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23188) - you deserved it (2425)
On 03/15/2010 at 11:27am - love - by stunned (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to have fun at school. So, we went into the locker room. We were making out for a couple minutes when the door opened. It was the principal, who also happens to be her dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8874) - you deserved it (24062)
On 02/05/2010 at 3:17pm - love - by topfisherman (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my boyfriend (who's a bit older) introduced me to his daughter. I was expecting a toddler. Nope, she's a year older than me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9393) - you deserved it (24030)
On 12/10/2009 at 7:28pm - misc - by ohcrap (woman) - United States (Georgia)
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