About Country29 : So I'm addicted to fmls... Support group??
Country29's FML badges
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Country29's favorite FMLs
by embarassedmuch / 10/30/2012 at 12:05am / United States / Miscellaneous
by CutestBoysEver / 10/29/2012 at 9:30pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids
Today, maintenance came to fix the constantly beeping alarm system near my apartment. They changed it from beeping on-and-off to one never-ending beep, similar to the sound of my sanity flat-lining. FML
by tcm123 / 10/29/2012 at 12:31am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was taking a walk with a girl I really like. Trying to impress her, I mentioned I'd just learned how to do a front flip, and she told me to prove it. I did the flip, but stumbled forward on the landing and smacked head-first into a pole. She's still laughing. FML
by RedFox12 / 10/27/2012 at 8:12pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
by Monkey / 10/27/2012 at 11:02am / United States / Intimacy
by geena / 10/27/2012 at 2:42am / United States (Illinois) / Work
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate, and I gave her a condom to put on me. She tried to open it with her teeth, but ripped it. That was my only condom. I'm now sitting here watching a soap opera with a boner. FML
by Andrew / 10/23/2012 at 3:12pm / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/17/2012 at 6:15am / Australia / Love
Today, I asked my husband to come upstairs to our bedroom, thinking I could get some "special time." It ended up with us arguing about his mother, and him falling asleep cuddling my pillow while sucking his thumb. FML
by anonymous2.0 / 10/12/2012 at 2:15am / United States (North Carolina) / Love
by britchick95 / 10/10/2012 at 4:03pm / United States (Nebraska) / Miscellaneous
Today, I applied for a job as a secretary. As I sat in the waiting room, the interviewer came out with his wife. She gave me a once-over, then said to her husband, "Hire this one. She's so ugly, you would never have an affair with her." FML
by caltech / 10/10/2012 at 12:15am / United States (California) / Work
Today, I asked my husband to watch our daughter while I ran a few errands. While he treated himself to a long nap, she decided our fish needed a bubble bath, and squeezed out an entire bottle of dish soap. I came home to bubbles all over the floor, five dead fish, and one sleeping husband. FML
by Anonymous / 09/25/2012 at 6:35pm / United States / Kids
Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML
by -___- / 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Kids
Today, my boyfriend and I had breakfast with his grandmother. She told him how I'm prettier than "that Mexican" he'd brought home for dinner last week. We had dinner with her last week, and I'm that same Mexican. She then went on to how Mexicans are what's wrong with the economy. FML
by MexicanMe / 09/14/2012 at 10:13am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, after having a long talk with my mother about gays, she told me that she was totally open. I felt completely relieved, being gay myself. Seconds later, she said, "But not for you. I want you to find me a nice girl that can give me lots of grand kids." FML
by EvilMother / 09/13/2012 at 8:57pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous