About CoolRainbowdash : Hi :3
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
50 quality responses
Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.
Today, I was at a frat band party dancing with my girl when I felt some liquid on my arm. Normally, I'll lick spilled drinks off my arms and being slightly intoxicated, I did. Then I realized it was chunky. The girl dancing next to us had puked everywhere and I licked her vomit off my arm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24242) - you deserved it (93076)
On 04/18/2009 at 6:42am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)
Today, I took the bus to work and a sweet old lady got on after me and sat next to me. Halfway to work, she fell asleep and her head was on my shoulder. Trying to be nice, I gently tried to wake her up before my stop came. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (549961) - you deserved it (35348)
On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was working as a manager of the local movie theater. This six year old came in with no parents or anyone else. When I asked him where his parents were he looked at me and said, "Shut up white boy, I don't have to listen to your shit." I just got told by a six year old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53160) - you deserved it (5383)
On 04/13/2009 at 8:44pm - work - by brad3720 (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, half asleep, I dropped my pill before I could take it. I quickly picked it up and washed it down. Five hours later, I just found my pill on the ground. What did I swallow? FML
I agree, your life sucks (86353) - you deserved it (17604)
On 04/13/2009 at 12:12pm - misc - by anonymiss (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was trying to get drama students to attempt to make themselves cry. I was not having any luck, until suddenly a girl burst into tears, sobbing uncontrollably. I jumped up to applaud, saying what a wonderful thing it is to have such expressive kids. Turns out her grandma just died. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46731) - you deserved it (7683)
On 04/02/2009 at 8:37pm - misc - by dramateach11 (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my friend was saying how her "nano" died. I quickly responded by saying, "So? Recharge it." Turns out she didn't say "nano"; she'd said "nana." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21716) - you deserved it (42949)
On 04/02/2009 at 12:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I ran to a public bathroom because of explosive diarrhea. In the middle of it, I noticed there was no more toilet paper nor paper towels remaining. The smallest bill in my wallet was a 5. I had to pay 10 dollars to wipe my own butt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (76555) - you deserved it (13451)
On 04/01/2009 at 4:16am - misc - by highleyj (man) - United States (California)
Today, I ran to a public bathroom because of explosive diarrhea. In the middle of it, I noticed there was no more toilet paper nor paper towels remaining. The smallest bill in my wallet was a 5. I had to pay 10 dollars to wipe my own butt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (76555) - you deserved it (13451)
On 04/01/2009 at 4:16am - misc - by highleyj (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was at work at a preschool. I was sitting outside with the kids and was getting bored so I started singing. One of the little girls runs up and puts her hand over my mouth and tells me to stop. I'm in a select chorus at my highschool and plan to major in choral studies in college. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41896) - you deserved it (9018)
On 03/28/2009 at 10:14am - kids - by justjust (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my friends and me had a little water balloon fight and somehow it led to throwing water balloons at cars. We all decided to hit a car all at once, after one came by we all hit it. The car stopped and started flashing bright blue lights. We ended up hitting an off-duty police car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8267) - you deserved it (84688)
On 03/26/2009 at 1:20am - misc - by AzNFoo (man) - United States (California)
Today, I got up extra early to curl my hair because I wanted to look nice at school for a change. After coming downstairs my mom yells at me and says, "See, when you don't wake up on time your hair looks like that. You could have atleast combed it!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (56350) - you deserved it (4287)
On 03/24/2009 at 12:11pm - misc - by Rai (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, was my sixteenth birthday. I was hoping to get a car. Instead, my parents got me a 3 month membership at the gym so I can lose weight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32368) - you deserved it (40473)
On 03/16/2009 at 11:10pm - misc - by not_so_sweet_sixteen - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, I was using the elliptical when I got a bad wedgie. All the ellipticals are up against a wall so after trying to pick it I finally decided to just pull down the back of my pants and underwear. I then remembered there was a window to a yoga class behind me. I mooned them all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8666) - you deserved it (43142)
On 03/13/2009 at 12:26am - misc - by MikeyPeters - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was late to school for the third time this week because my alarm clock didn't go off. I clearly remembered setting it, so I videotaped myself sleeping. It turns out I've been turning off my alarm clock in my sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48093) - you deserved it (11040)
On 03/11/2009 at 1:33am - misc - by EFFED4LIFE (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was at work and a very obese woman came in to get a pedicure. When she took her shoes off I noticed an odd black substance on her feet. I started scrubbing it off and wondered out loud, "What IS this stuff??" As a chunk of it fell onto my lip, she replied, "Girl, that's just the fungus." FML
I agree, your life sucks (86798) - you deserved it (4660)
On 03/10/2009 at 7:55am - work - by SalonGirl (woman) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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