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CookiesNmilk

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CookiesNmilk
  • Town/Country : SF, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 803
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About CookiesNmilk : i like cookies

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CookiesNmilk's favorite FMLs

Today, I fell asleep in my last period class. When I woke up my teacher said "you missed your bus". I grabbed all my stuff and ran out the room. My class mates were standing outside the class laughing. We still had an hour left in class. FML

#5145727
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8457) - you deserved it (51686)

On 09/09/2009 at 8:32am - misc - by Victor (man) - United States

Today, I was having sex with my husband. As I was undressing, he said, "Arr, I spy me some booty!" I let it go, I'm used to his embarassing pirate talk. But as he orgasmed, he screamed, "I'VE FOUND THE BURIED TREASURE!" My neighbors heard in the apartment next door and called to let me know. FML

#4361327
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46099) - you deserved it (6085)

On 08/07/2009 at 1:39pm - intimacy - by piratequeen (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my mum called and told me she had bought me a new, white dish washer for my apartment because it doesn't have one. I was SO excited and told her I'd pay her back as soon as I could. I only had to pay her $1.25. She bought me a sponge. FML

#3650725
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38260) - you deserved it (7584)

On 07/10/2009 at 9:09pm - money - by thanksalot (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I woke up finding myself violently humping my pillow. My mom recorded it. FML

#3474895
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59536) - you deserved it (11396)

On 07/04/2009 at 4:58am - intimacy - by R_U_CEREAL (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was hard at work cleaning up from a party I had while my parents were out for the night. Not a bottle of beer or a red cup was left for them to find. However, my parents did find two of my friends in their bedroom, still passed out and naked from beer and sex last night. FML

#2685483
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16719) - you deserved it (70761)

On 06/07/2009 at 7:41am - intimacy - by zep (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I gave a big presentation at work. The manager decided to video tape it. I went through my presentation with ease and was confident I did a good job. My confidence was then lowered after watching the tape. Apparently, my boobs are much more interesting than what I had to say. FML

#1869352
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46091) - you deserved it (5150)

On 05/12/2009 at 9:41am - misc - by Viridian - United States

Today, I gave a big presentation at work. The manager decided to video tape it. I went through my presentation with ease and was confident I did a good job. My confidence was then lowered after watching the tape. Apparently, my boobs are much more interesting than what I had to say. FML

#1869352
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46091) - you deserved it (5150)

On 05/12/2009 at 9:41am - misc - by Viridian - United States

Today, I had a massive argument with my boyfriend in which he called me stupid repeatedly. I stomped out of his house and sent a very angry text to my best friend about him. She didn't text back. Then my boyfriend texted. 'My girlfriend is so stupid she can't even text the right number.' FML

#1775796
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15144) - you deserved it (66125)

On 05/09/2009 at 11:48am - love - by rawkdinosawr (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found out that my husband named our daughter after his favorite porn star. FML

#1749459
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (125938) - you deserved it (11788)

On 05/08/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by Oblivious (woman) - Kuwait

Today, I had a terrible dream where my boyfriend cheated on me with his ex. I woke up almost crying and called him just to tell him how much he means to me. Turns out my dream gave him that little extra push he needed to confess he's been cheating on me. With his ex. FML

#1747216
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73790) - you deserved it (3969)

On 05/08/2009 at 12:23pm - love - by WonderWall09 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that the guy i've been having sex with for over a month didn't know my name until today. No wonder he always ever called me 'baby.' FML

#1716313
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28412) - you deserved it (61564)

On 05/07/2009 at 12:17pm - intimacy - by ummPORQUE (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that the guy i've been having sex with for over a month didn't know my name until today. No wonder he always ever called me 'baby.' FML

#1716313
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28412) - you deserved it (61564)

On 05/07/2009 at 12:17pm - intimacy - by ummPORQUE (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that the guy i've been having sex with for over a month didn't know my name until today. No wonder he always ever called me 'baby.' FML

#1716313
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28412) - you deserved it (61564)

On 05/07/2009 at 12:17pm - intimacy - by ummPORQUE (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that the guy i've been having sex with for over a month didn't know my name until today. No wonder he always ever called me 'baby.' FML

#1716313
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28412) - you deserved it (61564)

On 05/07/2009 at 12:17pm - intimacy - by ummPORQUE (woman) - United States (Florida)



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