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Offline (the 10/18/2015 at 6:51pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 9438
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About Conrob : My life probably isn't bad enough to have an accepted FML, but I still enjoy reading others

Conrob's page activity

Visits<b>okcnation</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 8:02pm<b>MR_CUDDLY</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 8:29am

Conrob's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

See all of Conrob's badges

Conrob's favorite FMLs

Today, feeling in need of a self-esteem boost, I took what I thought was a good selfie and I put it on Facebook. Out of 500 friends, the only response I got was a picture of Saddam Hussein with the caption, "This is why I bomb people." FML

by why they bomb / 03/09/2015 at 2:01am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was told that I need to learn to "let things go" by a woman who held a four-month grudge over a ham sandwich. FML

by NoHamForMeThanks / 03/08/2015 at 10:36pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, while cleaning my son's room, I found an envelope labelled "PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL" under his bed. I opened it, only to find it was a glitter bomb. I couldn't get it all cleaned off myself before he got home. He just said "HAH! Serves you right!" and went to his room smirking. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2015 at 1:11pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids

Today, while trying to sleep, I heard what sounded like someone breaking into my house. I ran downstairs, only to find my cat had ripped down my blinds and was tangled up in them, thrashing around the floor like a fish. FML

by Sarah1330 / 02/24/2015 at 11:33pm / United States / Animals

Today, after I got home from a long day at work. I go inside my room and find a life-size cut out of Miley Cyrus. I don't know how it got here. I'm the only person with a key to my apartment. FML

by I'm screwed / 01/27/2015 at 6:46pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, my asshat roommate tricked me into eating a weed brownie. I thought it was his terrible attempt at baking regular brownies until it kicked in at college. I was so high, I started giggling like a schoolgirl when my instructor said "Dickens". Now everyone thinks I'm a retard. FML

by Annomymous / 01/23/2015 at 1:12pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, at Walmart, a crazy old woman bitched me out for being pregnant. She kept following me around, calling me a stupid teen slut and saying she hoped my baby died so I could live a "normal life". I'm 26 and just very short. FML

by Anonymous / 01/21/2015 at 9:34am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my boyfriend dresses in my underwear and tights, takes suggestive shots of his ass and legs, and uses them to trick people into thinking he's a girl so they buy him stuff in his online games. FML

by mybfthecrossdresser / 01/20/2015 at 10:08am / Australia (Western Australia) / Love

Today, while on my driving test, the guy told me to pull over and do a U-turn. A few minutes later, he asked me to do another one. After the test, he said I'd failed because the second U-turn was illegal, and I should have refused to comply. I didn't know they're even allowed do that. FML

by Anonymous / 01/19/2015 at 6:58pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I was accused of letting my dog take a shit on the sidewalk and not picking it up. My dog's a chihuahua, and the turd was almost longer than he is. I got fined anyway. FML

by Titatoum / 01/17/2015 at 4:12pm / Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML

by con135 / 01/12/2015 at 8:16pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I refused to serve a woman alcohol, as she looked underage. She complained to my manager about "age racism". FML

by nick / 01/12/2015 at 3:23am / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Work

Today, I had a sneeze attack while my nose was bleeding. Now my living room looks like a crime scene. FML

by MonsterProblems / 01/07/2015 at 2:07am / Croatia / Health

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time in over a month. When I came, I thrust one last time and let out a huge fart. She couldn't keep her mouth shut about it, and now all our friends keep calling me "CumFart". FML

by I'll Make You FartCum / 01/02/2015 at 4:53pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, a customer threatened to smash my face in because I wouldn't give him a veteran's discount on a donut. He looked like he'd eaten his way out of fat camp, and it seemed the only action he'd seen was fighting his way into a lard factory. Still, he swung fast, and I now have a black eye. FML

by Anonymous / 07/24/2014 at 5:23pm / United States (Virginia) / Work