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Comet_Candy

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Comet_Candy
  • Town/Country : The Orphanage with Internet Access, Antarctica
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2541
  • Number of comments : 150
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About Comet_Candy : Feel free to message me c: I'm a pretty open person and I love talking with other people.

A little about myself: I love baking, floral arrangement, karaoke, and the colour red. I have an affinity for cute things and animals. I also make costumes and cute stuffed animals in my spare time. I enjoy a good cup of tea. Especially peach.

I really enjoy playing Lollipop Chainsaw and Bayonetta.

Mami Tomoe is mai waifu~

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Comet_Candy's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet. She said, "If you're so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father because I've already banged four guys." FML

#19995628
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52253) - you deserved it (9698)

On 08/01/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I was at the beach with my parents, and I went for a swim in the sea. I got out and my parents started laughing their asses off. It wasn't until my dad pulled a condom out of my hair that I realized what they were laughing at. My dad even took a picture. FML

#19851846
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22678) - you deserved it (1702)

On 06/26/2012 at 6:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)

Today, I foolishly told my husband that I know he's been holding back sexually, and that I was willing to indulge any sexual fantasies he may have. Now it seems that tonight, I'll be responding to the name "Fluttershy". FML

#19846265
398 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24094) - you deserved it (14966)

On 06/25/2012 at 6:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I was talking with my wife of five years, and I gave her a few hints about wanting kids. After our talk, she looked at me completely serious and said "Yeah, yeah, kids are great and all, but can't we just get you a dog?" FML

#19841919
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19333) - you deserved it (4958)

On 06/24/2012 at 11:03pm - love - by Richard (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my mom reached the lowest point of her midlife crisis. She convinced herself she's psychic and grounded me for something she "knows" I'm going to do. FML

#19832041
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21769) - you deserved it (1409)

On 06/23/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Coffee Boy - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was sent a letter by the vet, saying my cat was late for her yearly checkup. My cat died last week and I'd had her cremated by the same people who had sent the letter. FML

#19815411
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25598) - you deserved it (1878)

On 06/19/2012 at 10:15pm - animals - by jnr1234 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while taking part in a lifeguarding exercise, I was supposed to "drown" to get another guard to save me. After all was done, my boss called me into his office and screamed at me for "drowning the wrong way," and threatening our reputation. FML

#19699245
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18034) - you deserved it (1461)

On 05/29/2012 at 2:43pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while taking part in a lifeguarding exercise, I was supposed to "drown" to get another guard to save me. After all was done, my boss called me into his office and screamed at me for "drowning the wrong way," and threatening our reputation. FML

#19699245
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18034) - you deserved it (1461)

On 05/29/2012 at 2:43pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was at my new boyfriend's flat. As I came out of the toilet he walked over, took my hand, looked at me and whispered, "You washed your hands. Good." in an extremely creepy manner. FML

#19605689
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16334) - you deserved it (2540)

On 05/11/2012 at 1:03am - misc - by Lizofsmeg (woman) - United States

Today, while showering with my boyfriend, he asked if something was weird about his penis. Naturally, I looked closer. As soon as I did, he sprayed my face with urine. This is only the beginning; we just moved in. FML

#19586096
359 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43845) - you deserved it (8536)

On 05/07/2012 at 5:42am - intimacy - by quirrus (woman) - United States

Today, I faked my age to win a colouring competition. I just turned 19. FML

#19557146
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7151) - you deserved it (23026)

On 05/01/2012 at 4:24am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to a blood drive. The nurse taking my blood mentioned that she'd been called in on her day off, and she swore she wasn't drunk. I didn't know what to do, so I just smiled and blinked back tears as she savaged the vein in my arm. FML

#19466370
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19976) - you deserved it (2581)

On 04/14/2012 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is afraid of female orgasms. Right as I was about to climax, he panicked, pulled out, and ran into the bathroom. FML

#19410577
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33690) - you deserved it (2758)

On 04/05/2012 at 2:47am - intimacy - by displeased - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I made a new friend. He seemed pretty cool, until we came to the topic of religion and the ancient alien theory. I'm seemingly now friends with a guy who thinks alien Jesus raped an Earth woman, and we're the resulting cross-breed. FML

#19355965
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16190) - you deserved it (2858)

On 03/27/2012 at 3:40am - misc - by blueglover - United States (California)

Today, I learned why the phrase "seafood taco salad" terrifies everyone in the school's cafeteria. What happened to me after eating it made Saw III look like a Disney movie. FML

#19352692
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16319) - you deserved it (2934)

On 03/26/2012 at 6:21pm - health - by Mandy - United States



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