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Colonel_Lexi

Offline (the 06/10/2014 at 6:29pm) | Search for a member

Colonel_Lexi

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 10 November 1992 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1073
  • Number of comments : 141
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About Colonel_Lexi : Why are you on my page?

Colonel_Lexi's page activity

Visits<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 6:42am<b>PiroPiroKyun</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 10:20am<b>GreenBeast</b> - the 03/11/2014 at 3:58pm<b>roza043</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 3:08am<b>perdix</b> - the 05/03/2012 at 8:29pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 02/23/2012 at 10:09pm<b>EconomicCrisis</b> - the 02/21/2012 at 1:54am<b>CaptainPickles72</b> - the 02/19/2012 at 12:09am<b>OctoberRainfall</b> - the 02/03/2012 at 12:08pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 02/03/2012 at 10:19am<b>Haha_no_123</b> - the 02/01/2012 at 3:36pm<b>alexup24</b> - the 01/25/2012 at 7:35pm<b>AyeTee77</b> - the 01/24/2012 at 10:58pm<b>Tvolsfan325</b> - the 01/24/2012 at 12:34pm

Colonel_Lexi's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of Colonel_Lexi's badges

Colonel_Lexi's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a coffee shop with my friend. The guy rang her up and said it was only a dollar as he winked at her $10 purchase. Then he rang me up at completely full price. She got his number and I got to be the ugly friend once again. FML

#19948524
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28024) - you deserved it (3157)

On 07/17/2012 at 2:09am - misc - by theuglyfriend (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to Hooters for lunch. My food was brought to me by a man. FML

#19288594
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24469) - you deserved it (14351)

On 03/16/2012 at 1:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was feeling frisky for the first time in months, so I started feeling up my husband. He kept insisting he had a headache and that he wasn't feeling it tonight. When I noticed his sarcasm, he said "Yeah, doesn't feel so great, does it?" and turned the TV volume up. FML

#19156948
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10052) - you deserved it (54428)

On 02/24/2012 at 10:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, an intoxicated homeless man tried to chase me out of a McDonald's because he thought I was President Obama. I'm a 26-year-old white woman. FML

#18892690
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29577) - you deserved it (2471)

On 01/23/2012 at 7:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I took my kids to visit their grandma. At one point while playing, my youngest said "shit", so I admonished her. My mom snorted and told me to "stop being such a little bitch", because it will make my kids into "lame prisses like their mother". FML

#18892248
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25085) - you deserved it (6806)

On 01/23/2012 at 6:26pm - kids - by gloria77 (woman) - United States

Today, my long lost father came to visit me. He got drunk, then tried to beat me up. My neighbor called the police, and as soon as they got there, my father yelled, "Help! This man tried to stab me!" The sad part is, they believed him. FML

#18884912
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29875) - you deserved it (1731)

On 01/22/2012 at 9:59pm - misc - by Sadfaic (man) - United States

Today, I had to send a picture of my Grandma at her funeral to my girlfriend, because she thought I was out cheating on her. FML

#18883322
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33700) - you deserved it (5164)

On 01/22/2012 at 7:31pm - love - by Jeff G. - United States (Arkansas)

Today, while I was getting ready to take a shower, I placed my phone on the counter next to the toilet. While I was washing my hair, someone called me. My phone was on vibrate, so I didn't hear it until it vibrated off the counter and into the toilet. FML

#18881874
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16199) - you deserved it (27942)

On 01/22/2012 at 5:03pm - misc - by needanewphone - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend and I shared our first kiss. When I leaned in on him, he fell over backwards and smashed his head against the floor. FML

#18880094
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24557) - you deserved it (3594)

On 01/22/2012 at 1:06pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I caught myself thinking about what to cook for dinner tonight. During sex. FML

#18878139
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26034) - you deserved it (6530)

On 01/22/2012 at 6:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my recent ex-girlfriend posted a photo of herself on Facebook. It was a picture of herself in the arms of a half-naked male stripper. She posted it on my wall. FML

#18877694
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29837) - you deserved it (4776)

On 01/22/2012 at 4:12am - love - by sisco2901 (man) - Slovakia (Nitra)

Today, I was kicked out of a comedy club for laughing too loudly. FML

#18877531
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29561) - you deserved it (7041)

On 01/22/2012 at 3:25am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out that the daily "vitamins" that my dad has been giving me for the last three months were actually weight loss pills. FML

#18876628
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28338) - you deserved it (6454)

On 01/22/2012 at 1:10am - health - by suckstobefat - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my girlfriend and I were hugging in the hall after school. This annoying kid I know walked by, and yelled, "Tiny penis!" at me. My girlfriend responded, "Yep." FML

#18872810
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36246) - you deserved it (4415)

On 01/21/2012 at 5:38pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I asked a guy if he could buy me a pack of cigarettes, since I'm still under 18. He took my money, went into the supermarket, and must have slipped out a side-entrance, because he never came back. FML

#17367544
432 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8607) - you deserved it (112540)

On 08/04/2011 at 2:28pm - money - by Joe - United States (Florida)



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