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  • Number of visits : 1241
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Code's favorite FMLs

Today, the city shut off the water at my house because my roommate thought that the water bills he had been hoarding were "suggestions." FML


I agree, your life sucks (31577) - you deserved it (3107)

On 11/02/2009 at 12:30pm - money - by parched (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was handling corrosive chemicals when I accidentally spilled a beaker of Hydrochloric Acid on myself. I had to strip naked and use the emergency shower with my boss and my hot coworker watching. The worst part was when I realized my coworker was laughing at the size of my penis. FML


I agree, your life sucks (55748) - you deserved it (6731)

On 08/03/2009 at 2:33pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had just gotten a milkshake with some friends. We were about to drive past my ex's house, so I though it would be funny to throw the milkshake in his yard. Turns out, if you're going 50mph and try to throw a shake out the window, it comes right back at you. FML


I agree, your life sucks (7370) - you deserved it (99571)

On 06/08/2009 at 1:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was sitting in my basement watching IT. I heard a knocking at my door and turned the outside lights on to see a clown outside staring in at me. I freaked out and began screaming and jumping around like a Chihuahua on drugs. My friends told me it should be on YouTube within the week. FML


I agree, your life sucks (53824) - you deserved it (8716)

On 05/29/2009 at 4:14pm - misc - by dumbo (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking, "What can I get for you, cuntie?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (82197) - you deserved it (25092)

On 05/08/2009 at 4:53pm - work - by keeks_25 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I told my girlfriend I needed someone to talk to because I just found out my aunt has cancer. She told me to talk to her in an hour, Spongebob was on. FML


I agree, your life sucks (61725) - you deserved it (5287)

On 03/31/2009 at 10:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I decided to tell my mom about my choice to wait to have sex until after marriage. Coming from a very christian family I thought she would be proud. Instead she laughed and said, "is that your excuse for not being able to get laid?" and walked out of the room. FML


I agree, your life sucks (283436) - you deserved it (51633)

On 03/12/2009 at 1:53pm - intimacy - by sucks - United States

Today, I went to go get a haircut and I asked how much it was for a haircut, shampoo, and a blow job. I meant to say blow dry. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19959) - you deserved it (53244)

On 02/26/2009 at 6:21pm - misc - by Stixchop (man) - United States (Texas)

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  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

Friday 27 November 2015

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