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CobraLazerFace

Offline (the 10/06/2014 at 2:49am) | Search for a member

CobraLazerFace

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 14230
  • Number of comments : 144
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About CobraLazerFace : Apparently you need 1000 comments to be able to use sarcasm here.

CobraLazerFace's page activity

Visits<b>firelord4563</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 10:03am<b>bazookajoey</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 7:35pm<b>Cheezits4dayz</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 9:02pm<b>dnabdnekdjchs</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 10:54am<b>max2732</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 10:04am<b>dylanger16</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 7:41am<b>the_fanciest_man</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 7:13am<b>allred1997</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 12:41am<b>JesterMester</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 10:21pm<b>gshocker20</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 9:33pm<b>SweetasCandy0609</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 8:51pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 8:33pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 8:15pm<b>afrahmohasin</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 9:43pm<b>psychopolarbear</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 7:22pm<b>hailstorm187</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 7:05pm<b>Miss_Brii</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 12:12pm<b>KazuTrumpet1512</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 4:22am

Liked!<b>dylanger16</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 1:41pm

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CobraLazerFace's favorite FMLs

Today, I texted my boyfriend of two years and asked if he wanted to go to ball with me. His response was "The person you are trying to message cancelled their phone service and moved to Mexico. Taco taco burrito." I'll take that as a no. FML

#21024175
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45941) - you deserved it (5191)

On 01/11/2014 at 12:55am - love - by rollergirl13 - United States (Alaska)

Today, after much debate I let my mom wax my eyebrows. Now I get to look super surprised until they grow back. FML

#21024170
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37452) - you deserved it (9296)

On 01/11/2014 at 12:49am - misc - by madib33 (woman) - United States

Today, we were playing charades at school. My word was "head", so I pointed to my face. Nobody on my team got it. But they did guess, "Ugly?!" FML

#21024059
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41400) - you deserved it (4441)

On 01/10/2014 at 11:02pm - misc - by kyyle - United States (Illinois)

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

#21023934
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46342) - you deserved it (8722)

On 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my grandpa took my face in both hands, kissed me on the lips, said "Now you can tell all your friends you've had your first kiss," and walked out of the room. FML

#21023495
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48338) - you deserved it (4581)

On 01/10/2014 at 11:47am - misc - by wtf - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend saw a YouTube video of a guy throwing boiling water into the cold air, with the water immediately turning to ice and vapor. He copied it, but only succeeded in dousing himself with boiling water, then making me drive his idiot self to the hospital. FML

#21023480
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43194) - you deserved it (5110)

On 01/10/2014 at 11:12am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I'm trapped in my apartment, due to the fact that five raccoons have decided to sit outside my only door and prevent me from getting out. Every time I look at one, they hiss at me. FML

#21023350
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42915) - you deserved it (5309)

On 01/10/2014 at 6:15am - animals - by RaccoonFever - United States (California)

Today, I joked with a pregnant girl in a state juvenile correctional facility where I work that eating a lot of candy would damage the unborn baby's teeth. Without batting an eye, she responded that she would simply "eat some toothpaste after the candy." FML

Today, my parents used my going away party as a cover up for my sister's surprise party. I didn't know until they brought out the cake. FML

#21022962
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39376) - you deserved it (2988)

On 01/09/2014 at 9:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sri Lanka

Today, my mom tried giving me the sex talk. Her version of "the talk" consisted of making me watch videos of guys jacking off and reassuring me that "it's natural." FML

#21022635
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52447) - you deserved it (4760)

On 01/09/2014 at 4:48pm - intimacy - by ReallyMom - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my lips were dry and chapped, so I asked if I could use some of my friend's chapstick. She didn't mind, so I quickly put some on. Only later did I notice that my lips were sparkly. Turns out it was glitter balm. Now everyone calls me "princess." FML

#21021931
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40235) - you deserved it (12586)

On 01/08/2014 at 10:23pm - misc - by chapstick (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was asked to go to a ball by the guy I like. The theme is masquerade. He made me a Robin mask; he's wearing a Batman mask. FML

#21021762
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38573) - you deserved it (10755)

On 01/08/2014 at 7:54pm - love - by Unfortunately Me (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. They thought it would be funny to pretend that they're nudists. FML

#21021758
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47022) - you deserved it (4502)

On 01/08/2014 at 7:53pm - misc - by loganHchrist - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I joined my friends out birthday clubbing. After I'd gotten a little drunk, a few guys asked for my number. I rattled off random numbers, until I accidentally said my mother's. Guess who woke up to a text at 2:17 in the morning, containing a picture of a penis. FML

#21022033
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26976) - you deserved it (35144)

On 01/08/2014 at 7:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my 175-pound rottweiler I've raised since a puppy watched me get jumped and robbed of my phone and money in my yard. An hour later, he hopped the fence and chased the mail man down the street after he leaned on the fence for a second. FML

#21021631
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46933) - you deserved it (4747)

On 01/08/2014 at 6:02pm - animals - by Zach Got Robbed (man) - United States (New Jersey)



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