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CobraLazerFace

Offline (the 10/06/2014 at 2:49am) | Search for a member

CobraLazerFace

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 32044
  • Number of comments : 144
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About CobraLazerFace : Apparently you need 1000 comments to be able to use sarcasm here.

CobraLazerFace's page activity

Visits<b>Celeden</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 12:23am<b>Kidjazzin</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 6:15pm<b>bwup</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 7:55am<b>seetei</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 4:46pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 9:37pm<b>AWildNoeAppeared</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 9:33am<b>firelord4563</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 10:03am<b>bazookajoey</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 7:35pm<b>Cheezits4dayz</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 9:02pm<b>dnabdnekdjchs</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 10:54am<b>max2732</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 10:04am<b>dylanger16</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 7:41am<b>the_fanciest_man</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 7:13am<b>allred1997</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 12:41am<b>JesterMester</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 10:21pm<b>gshocker20</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 9:33pm<b>SweetasCandy0609</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 8:51pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 8:33pm

Fucked!<b>dylanger16</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 1:41pm

CobraLazerFace's FML badges

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100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of CobraLazerFace's badges

CobraLazerFace's favorite FMLs

Today, I managed to not laugh as a potential high-profile Italian client with a heavy accent repeatedly pronounced "sheet metal" as "shit metal". Unfortunately, my boss and a senior colleague couldn't contain their own laughter. We lost that deal, and our jobs are now endangered. FML

#21227795
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40982) - you deserved it (4888)

On 08/02/2014 at 6:37pm - work - by Shitmetalseller (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, my girlfriend interrupted my proposal to take a selfie with the ice cream I had just bought her. She then said no. FML

#21227229
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58194) - you deserved it (6280)

On 08/02/2014 at 12:00am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was rejected by a company I applied to. When I was writing my application, I spent so much time on their website researching that the ads on my browser are almost all for their products. It's like getting rejected again with every click. FML

#21227193
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36787) - you deserved it (3938)

On 08/01/2014 at 11:23pm - work - by heartfelt - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I was watching my 3 year old brother. He asked me to get him a cookie and I said, "What's the magic word?" He looked at me angrily and said "Bitch, please." FML

#21227114
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47228) - you deserved it (7983)

On 08/01/2014 at 9:57pm - kids - by WickedRene (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I won a big raffle. However, my name is so ridiculous-sounding that they thought someone was playing a prank, and pulled a different ticket. I was too embarrassed to say anything. FML

#21227005
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42394) - you deserved it (12166)

On 08/01/2014 at 7:10pm - misc - by infortunatename - United States (California)

Today, I got suspended from work after getting caught reading a work-related FML. Irony is funny, but it doesn't pay the bills. FML

#21226986
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35274) - you deserved it (17530)

On 08/01/2014 at 6:38pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend's dad returned home from deployment. Being the grade A fucktard that I am, I got flustered and asked, "So um, did you make it back?" He looked me dead in the eyes and said completely deadpan, "No, obviously I died. Moron." FML

#21226906
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36961) - you deserved it (24816)

On 08/01/2014 at 4:45pm - misc - by whoops (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I confided to my grandma that I'm suffering from depression and I feel like a burden to everyone. She replied that her grandpa used to suffer from depression too, but that he'd cured himself in the end, namely by committing suicide. Thanks, grandma, thanks. FML

#21226890
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43183) - you deserved it (4043)

On 08/01/2014 at 4:09pm - health - by lacieQ (woman) - Canada

Today, I found out that my wife of 12 years has slept with the workmen we've had working on our long term building project. They call her the "quickie queen". FML

#21226819
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60902) - you deserved it (4739)

On 08/01/2014 at 2:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I had to explain to my father why it isn't a good idea to shove a metal knife into the toaster when trying to get at a small piece of toast. This man is 45-years-old and has a PhD. FML

Today, my fiancé said "Rachel" instead of my name when asked to repeat, "I take thee, Emily, to be my lawfully wedded wife." I was shocked, so he explained while laughing that he doesn't even know a Rachel. He ruined our wedding for a Friends quote. FML

Today, my son said his first word. Unfortunately, that word was "cock." I've tried convincing myself that he's trying to say "clock" but I just can't do it. FML

#21225778
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42554) - you deserved it (7521)

On 07/31/2014 at 12:24pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had trouble carrying a box upstairs because my arms were sore from working out. My mom asked me, "Why are you working out so much then?" I didn't have the heart to tell her it was because of her 100-pound weight gain and that I didn't want to end up looking like her. FML

#21225648
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43408) - you deserved it (6846)

On 07/31/2014 at 7:51am - health - by jogginglikeitsmyjob (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while wandering around the big city I just relocated to, I asked a seemingly pleasant-looking lady where the nearest library was. She told me to get lost, and started laughing. Then said she was just joking and gave me directions. I'm now standing in front of a gay strip joint. FML

#21225641
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46102) - you deserved it (4967)

On 07/31/2014 at 7:38am - misc - by lostintdot (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, the city shut off our water, because they said we didn't pay the bill. Turns out, it was sitting on their desk the whole time. I guess sending someone out to turn off our water was easier than checking to see if we'd actually paid the bill. FML

#21225552
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43717) - you deserved it (3010)

On 07/31/2014 at 3:35am - money - by fedUPwithPEOPLE (woman) - United States (Alabama)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

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