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ClumsyKee

Offline (the 08/07/2015 at 11:27am) | Search for a member

ClumsyKee

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 10142
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About ClumsyKee : An impatient, impulsive and immature artist who has attachment issues with her beloved gaming computer.

ClumsyKee's page activity

Visits<b>pavingboy</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 3:57pm<b>MdMan2</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 9:56pm<b>IronicLights</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 9:47pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 6:48am<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 9:52pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 12:41am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 3:34pm<b>skinnyminhy</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 12:16am<b>Pandacupcakelove</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 11:58am<b>sniper1321123</b> - the 02/08/2014 at 8:31pm<b>Rosa223</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 11:06am<b>moondoglou420</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 8:42pm<b>drshn</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 7:32pm<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 3:12pm<b>sCrEaMiNgToAsT</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 7:02am<b>peanut012</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 2:46pm<b>brians2617m</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 3:03am<b>Pebbles89</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 11:56pm

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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ClumsyKee's favorite FMLs

Today, on the eighth day of my diet, I met up with my study group. Everyone was snacking on junk food while I stuck to carrots. Someone put a Snickers bar on the table. "God, I want you," I thought. Turns out I was thinking out loud. The guy next to me inched his chair away. FML

#21050614
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38277) - you deserved it (7175)

On 02/04/2014 at 8:03pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, as usual, I stress ate. After having my exams prolonged for an extra week, I ate three extremely large packs of Skittles, and then threw them all up. Taste the rainbow, puke the rainbow. FML

#21048665
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40304) - you deserved it (15058)

On 02/02/2014 at 10:26pm - health - by Sad Student - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was in the process of finally losing my virginity. Part-way through, my neighbour started shouting from his backyard, "Go, Nicolas! You can do it!" He was talking to his son, but the two of us have the same name. I couldn't finish. FML

#21046533
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59153) - you deserved it (6541) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/31/2014 at 4:05pm - intimacy - by prochainefois (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had an upset stomach all day at work. When lunch break came, I rushed to the bathroom. Just as I turned into an unstoppable human whoopie cushion, a co-worker walked in. He heard the entire arse symphony, and just asked "What the fuck, dude?!" as he left. FML

#21045407
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42781) - you deserved it (4630)

On 01/30/2014 at 5:46pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, my boss let me know that I'm being laid off, via a text message that ended in "lmao". FML

#21043231
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48302) - you deserved it (3783)

On 01/28/2014 at 5:36pm - work - by soon to be unemployed (man) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

#21041278
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43791) - you deserved it (13375)

On 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm - work - by sabz21 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was in a market in France, and went to ask the seller for some potatoes. I speak fluent French, but I got flustered and instead of saying "pomme de terre", which is the French for potato, I said "pomme de merde". I literally asked for an "apple of shit". FML

Today, while I was fooling around with my girlfriend, she hurt her hand. It obviously wasn't very serious, so I told her to stop faking it. She responded, "Wanna know what I actually fake? My orgasms." FML

#21031998
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37887) - you deserved it (61170)

On 01/18/2014 at 5:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went to get my first tattoo. Before we started, the tattooist told me to just relax and embrace the pain. I guess I did that too well; I kept getting an erection throughout. FML

#21030923
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42632) - you deserved it (8069)

On 01/17/2014 at 3:56pm - health - by sausages (man) - Macedonia (Karpos)

Today, after his sixth beer, my dad looked me in the eye and said "I've never forgiven you for what you did to your mother's vagina". FML

#21025234
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58373) - you deserved it (5857)

On 01/12/2014 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

#21023934
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46543) - you deserved it (8749)

On 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I tried to lose my virginity to my boyfriend of a year. We're almost twenty. In the end, we both chickened out and played Pokémon instead. FML

#21020996
286 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62304) - you deserved it (27060)

On 01/08/2014 at 12:43am - intimacy - by gottacatchemall (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up to my psycho roommate trying to baptize me in my sleep. FML

#21020397
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51402) - you deserved it (4994)

On 01/07/2014 at 4:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was watching ESPN. My boyfriend came in, bitched about "boring tv," so I handed him the remote. He put on a Lifetime movie. I must be the only woman in America with this problem. FML

#21010622
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49605) - you deserved it (5055)

On 12/30/2013 at 4:38pm - love - by smokecloud_ (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, a DJ friend of mine offered me a part in one of his tracks. I was flattered, and accepted. All I ended up singing was, "I'm a bitch, I'm a bitch" over and over again in the background. FML

#21008243
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39023) - you deserved it (6795) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/28/2013 at 9:46am - misc - by Cacahuete (woman) - Sent from mobile version



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