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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I got my first acting part. I played the role of a bad boy who has to grab the leading lady's ass, who then slaps me in the face. The ass grab was done in one take. The slap required 14 takes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30535) - you deserved it (3485)
On 12/02/2009 at 6:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I realized that you should never teach your 6 year old child how to use the microwave, unless you want to be cleaning melted pet fish for about half an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30295) - you deserved it (7942)
On 12/01/2009 at 5:24pm - kids - by poopiemanlol - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I went to Walmart with my girlfriend. We bought the usual, food, Advil and condoms. While I waited in line, she went to grab everything. When she came back, I looked in the cart and saw no condoms. I asked her why she didn't get any. She replied "They ran out of smalls." Everyone laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37816) - you deserved it (6085)
On 12/01/2009 at 4:11pm - misc - by xXxJoe16xXx - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was in class. I am an older student going back for my PhD. I was kicked out of class for "sassing" my instructor for telling him he was wrong about what took place at an event I was actually present at. My instructor is a 22 year old TA. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34377) - you deserved it (2960)
On 12/01/2009 at 2:49pm - misc - by sassman (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, while on the phone with a client at work, I was planning on saying either "Yeah." or "Uh-huh." Without thinking, I combined the two and ended up saying "Yee-hah," like a cowboy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8882) - you deserved it (22499)
On 12/01/2009 at 12:25pm - work - by Jen (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was in line at the grocery store with my 3-year-old son. He was holding a tub of yogurt that had on it a cow wearing sunglasses. He shouted, "Mommy, look at the fat cow with the sunglasses on!" To my horror, the obese woman in front of us turned around. She was wearing sunglasses. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38510) - you deserved it (2230)
On 11/30/2009 at 1:59pm - misc - by annonymous - United States (California)
Today, we rearranged the bedroom and my boyfriend and I switched sides of the bed. When the alarm went off, he got confused as to which side the clock was on. Instead of hitting the snooze button like he normally does, he hit me in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22448) - you deserved it (6943)
On 11/30/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by SoVeryMonday (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my friend found a picture of herself on a website filled with pictures of thin people. I was in the picture, also. I was crossed-out with the word, "EWW" written next to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23794) - you deserved it (2959)
On 11/30/2009 at 12:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend watching me sleep. I asked him if he was staring at me because he was in love. He replied that it was because my farting wouldn't let him sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21123) - you deserved it (9825)
On 11/30/2009 at 2:37am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I pulled over to help an attractive girl on the highway in the middle of nowhere. When I asked if she needed help she told me she was going to try starting her car one more time. She then started to make fake engine noises and told me that she was good to go and that I should be on my way. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29276) - you deserved it (4178)
On 11/30/2009 at 2:27am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was working at a restaurant when my manager approached me and informed me that there was people having sex in the women's washroom, and he needed me to go in and ask them to cut it out. So I did. Five minutes later, a woman walks out with her disabled son and asks to talk to my manager. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27750) - you deserved it (1996)
On 11/30/2009 at 12:51am - intimacy - by Janer88 (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I went hiking with my friend. We both had to pee really bad. We went to the edge of a cliff to "relieve ourselves". He peed and it came and hit me in the face, he did it on purpose. So, I decided to get him back and peed at him. The wind changed direction and hit me in the face again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10963) - you deserved it (29587)
On 11/29/2009 at 5:53pm - misc - by Harry (man) - United States (California)
Today, while I was in confession, I was saying my sins and the priest called me a "pain in the ass." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28899) - you deserved it (7245)
On 11/29/2009 at 2:59am - misc - by ? - United States
Today, I found out I've been misspelling my middle name for 25 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12646) - you deserved it (27269)
On 11/28/2009 at 8:53pm - misc - by figures - United States
Today, my girlfriend's parents wanted to cook dinner for me. After a whole day of cooking up a storm, her parents cooked an elaborate meal of roast lamb, pork chops and grilled chicken. Rejecting a meal is like spitting in ones face in Chinese culture. I'm vegetarian. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26060) - you deserved it (9773)
On 11/28/2009 at 7:40pm - misc - by NickC (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)
Monday 20 May 2013
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