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ClosetCelt

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ClosetCelt
  • Town/Country : West Hills, U.S
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 25 April 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 10403
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 41 posted

About ClosetCelt : I live for out-of-character moments.
I'm a mutt.
I like foreign guys.
I have perfect pitch.
I like eyes.

ClosetCelt's last visitors

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50 favourites

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ClosetCelt's favorite FMLs

Today, I decided to drive my mothers Bentley. She is out of town and told me not to go near the car. Being 17, I didn't listen. As I was backing out the driveway, I was hit by an SUV, seriously damaging my moms car. Who was driving the SUV? My mom, coming home early. FML

#12878777
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9124) - you deserved it (66362)

On 09/03/2010 at 12:13am - misc - by ohseven6421 - United States (California)

Today, I received my first compliment in a really long time. It went, "Hey, you don't look like crap today." FML

#12874218
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22371) - you deserved it (3690)

On 09/02/2010 at 7:51pm - misc - by AmICrappyEveryOtherDay (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, the elevator broke in my dorm and won't be fixed for several days. I live on the 26th floor. FML

#12870338
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33650) - you deserved it (3160)

On 09/02/2010 at 1:39pm - misc - by flimflam (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I'm recovering from abdominal surgery. In addition to pain, I'm having trouble peeing and haven't pooped since Sunday, so my surgeon prescribed a laxative. Turns out I'm allergic to it. Now I'm covered in hives, even in my ears, incisions, and lady parts. I also still haven't pooped. FML

#12866112
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33735) - you deserved it (2253)

On 09/02/2010 at 3:25am - health - by coyote - Japan

Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML

#12858268
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23359) - you deserved it (2967)

On 09/01/2010 at 7:04pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was in the airport after saying goodbye to my boyfriend who left for three months. Walking back to my car, I saw a young couple kissing passionately. If that wasn't bad enough, the guy then picked his girlfriend up, spun her round in the air and her foot kicked me square in the jaw. FML

#12852491
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32268) - you deserved it (3390)

On 09/01/2010 at 9:50am - love - by ouch (woman) - Belgium (Brabant)

Today, I found out that whenever my best friend used to say she wanted to do my dad, she wasn't kidding. She accomplished her mission in my bed after school. FML

#12851592
331 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45711) - you deserved it (3147)

On 09/01/2010 at 7:10am - intimacy - by fmlskank93 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out that Whoopi Goldberg was NOT Oprah Winfrey's stage name. I was then laughed at for ages by my co-workers. FML

#12848184
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5456) - you deserved it (48063)

On 09/01/2010 at 12:30am - misc - by MisterMisinformed - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I have discovered things not to do while drunk. Like shaving my legs. FML

#12846178
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5836) - you deserved it (32189)

On 08/31/2010 at 10:46pm - health - by WIno - United States (Alabama)

Today, my boyfriend of three years proposed to me. He brought me to our favorite restaurant and ordered expensive champagne. It was all very romantic, until he got on one knee and I farted out of surprise. Loudly. FML

#12837026
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36160) - you deserved it (7382)

On 08/31/2010 at 10:48am - love - by maebyf - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend told everyone I queef during sex. Even his parents are calling me "Cooter Pooter." FML

#12816242
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32477) - you deserved it (6108)

On 08/30/2010 at 2:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was closing at work when someone came in ten minutes before close (2am) and placed a huge order. I couldn't turn him away because he's my manager from my other job. He was drunk. FML

#12807710
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25647) - you deserved it (2886)

On 08/29/2010 at 4:37pm - work - by xharuki - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I walked in on my mom giving my dad head. Acting like I hadn't seen anything, I asked if I could use a towel sitting on the dresser. My mom said, "No, we're going to need that one." FML

#12803986
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25521) - you deserved it (5183)

On 08/29/2010 at 11:37am - intimacy - by bkay26 - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend was talking with his friends about how long girls take to get ready (hair, make-up, etc.). I said, "I never spend a long time getting ready..." He then looked at me and said, "maybe you should." FML

#12803211
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26956) - you deserved it (6672)

On 08/29/2010 at 10:14am - love - by ILoveFML - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend was talking with his friends about how long girls take to get ready (hair, make-up, etc.). I said, "I never spend a long time getting ready..." He then looked at me and said, "maybe you should." FML

#12803211
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26956) - you deserved it (6672)

On 08/29/2010 at 10:14am - love - by ILoveFML - United States (New York)



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