ClosetCelt

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ClosetCelt

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 25 April 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 23919
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 41 posted

About ClosetCelt : I live for out-of-character moments.
I'm a mutt.
I like foreign guys.
I have perfect pitch.
I like eyes.

ClosetCelt's page activity

Visits<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 11:53pm<b>adambomb8181</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 11:19pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:37pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/28/2011 at 12:38pm<b>lolmyendoff456</b> - the 05/07/2011 at 11:02am<b>ohthebloodygore</b> - the 04/25/2011 at 4:09am<b>KaylaCrow</b> - the 11/01/2010 at 9:05pm<b>infowarrior</b> - the 10/28/2010 at 4:24pm<b>TigerTattoo</b> - the 08/13/2010 at 6:35am<b>unluckyluis</b> - the 08/03/2010 at 8:48pm<b>type1</b> - the 07/29/2010 at 2:25pm<b>That_Guy_Jake_JR</b> - the 07/24/2010 at 10:08am<b>ilovegage627</b> - the 07/24/2010 at 6:25am<b>281go</b> - the 07/23/2010 at 12:08am<b>blahh12</b> - the 04/04/2010 at 8:00pm<b>Starchild21</b> - the 12/24/2009 at 12:28am<b>JustSoLost</b> - the 12/08/2009 at 9:57pm<b>BaBiiSpAnKy821</b> - the 12/06/2009 at 12:06am

ClosetCelt's FML badges

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50 favourites

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ClosetCelt's favorite FMLs

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

by Anonymous / 02/04/2011 at 12:42am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend finally got me to orgasm, for the first time in my life, after trying for months. He started laughing when I climaxed. I asked why. Apparently I look like an Down's Syndrome child when I climax. FML

by Embarrassed / 02/03/2011 at 7:28pm / Intimacy

Today, I accidentally drank my sister's science project. Her science project consisted of taking a glass of orange juice and putting maggots in it to see if they would live. I thought it was just pulp. FML

by Username / 02/02/2011 at 11:46pm / Miscellaneous

Today, while in my room sleeping, my little brother deemed it necessary to come in and drop a book on my face. When I sat up with a now bloody nose, he looked at me, pointed, and said "You've just been facebooked" and ran away giggling. FML

by Malakai / 02/02/2011 at 12:57am / United States / Kids

Today, I realized that someone spray painted a giant black cock on the front of my house while I was asleep. I also just recently painted my entire house yellow. Yellow doesn't cover up black penis very well. FML

by Stormbringer / 02/01/2011 at 1:37am / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that the girl who my high school boyfriend cheated on me with is now the woman my husband is having an affair with. FML

by sad / 01/08/2011 at 12:22am / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, at work, my computer started acting up. I told my boss I could fix it, but he told me to call the IT department instead. Neither the IT technician or his supervisor could figure it out, so I showed them what was wrong and how to fix it. I was promptly fired for wasting 2 hours of company time. FML

by worksux / 01/05/2011 at 3:25pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I lost my virginity, I think. Does it still count if she left halfway through, laughing? FML

by Username / 01/03/2011 at 6:40am / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend talked me into having drunk sex. Right after we started, my head hit a wall, knocking me out. I woke up to him taking pics of my tits. FML

by Samantha / 01/01/2011 at 12:11am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, the horn in my car decided to malfunction. It honked continuously for an hour as I drove down the highway. FML

by nick / 12/23/2010 at 9:21pm / United States (Missouri) / Transportation

Today, I accidentally walked in on my roommate while she was changing clothes. She insisted on telling her boyfriend what had happened, because, "It wouldn't feel right" if she didn't. Her boyfriend is a MMA fighter/bodybuilder and has major jealousy issues. I'm screwed. FML

by screwed / 12/22/2010 at 12:56pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a call about my dog who went missing a week ago. The guy who called said "We have your dog, but you aren't getting her back." Then he hung up. FML

by ks.swan13 / 12/22/2010 at 4:50am / Animals

Today, I walked to school in -5 degree weather, snow up to ankles, for an exam. The school had closed and warned all the parents, but mine didn't tell me, because it was "funnier". FML

by stupid / 12/21/2010 at 10:21am / Ireland (Meath) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to go to the bathroom. I was in a rush, so I went into the boys bathroom. I then had diarrhea. The entire basketball team was waiting for me outside the stall. They did a slow clap for me. FML

by Anonymous / 12/20/2010 at 9:31pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I was playing hide and seek with a few friends. I hid in the bathroom, under the sink in a cabinet. I ended up having to sit there quiet as a mouse while my grandfather took an incredibly long and vile dump. I was too afraid to move. Let's just say he didn't rush it. FML

by Anonymous / 12/20/2010 at 12:09pm / United States / Miscellaneous